Chris and Reggie's Cosmic Treadmill, Episode 70: Christmas With the Superheroes #1 (1988)

Chris and Reggie's Cosmic Treadmill, Episode #70

Christmas With the Superheroes #1 (1988)
"Wanted: Santa Claus - Dead or Alive!"
"The Man Who Murdered Santa Claus!"
"The TT's Swingin' Christmas Carol!"
"Star Light, Star Bright... Farthest Star I See Tonight!"
"Twas the Fright Before Christmas!"
"The Silent Night of the Batman"
Writers - Denny O'Neil, Len Wein, Bob Haney, Paul Levitz, E. Nelson Bridwell & Mike Friedrich
Pencillers - Frank Miller, Dick Dillon, Nick Cardy, Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez, Curt Swan & Neal Adams
Inkers - Steve Mitchell, Dick Giordano & Murphy Anderson
Letterers - Ben Oda
Colorists - Glenn Whitmore, Helen Vesik & Jerry Serpe
Editors - Len Wein, Julius Schwartz
Cover Price: $2.95

Keeping our Christmas on Infinite Earths... in July festivities rolling along, today I'm sharing Reggie and my first Holiday special... DC Comics' Christmas With the Superheroes #1 from 1988.


Download

This was one of our longer episodes... as we were looking at like skatey-eight hundred creators and a half-dozen stories.  This was also my longest ever blog post to that point... and, actually, it very well still might be!  I still haven't published that "full-length" Bizarro World piece yet, so I think this one still might take the length-crown!

With that said... Just as with yesterday, if podcasts ain't your thing, there is a text-n-pics variation on this discussion that you can check out if you decide to click the cover below!  While you're at it, you might wanna check out my discussion of Christmas With the Superheroes #2 (1989)!

Legacy of... Sinbad...?

Legacy of Superman #1 (Sinbad)
"Funeral Pyres!"
Writer - William Messner-Loebs
Pencils - Curt Swan
Inks - Josef Rubenstein
Letters - Bill Oakley
Colors - Glenn Whitmore
Assistant Editor - Jennifer Frank
Editor - Mike Carlin

Shazaam!  Today we're going to talk all about my main man, Sinbad!

Oh, not him?  There's another?  Hmm... ohhhhh, the kid!  Yeah, I remember now.  Been a heckuva long time since I read the short "Sinbad Saga" in the Superman comics... I don't think it left all that much of an impact on me.  If I'm being honest, I was surprised to be reminded that he got himself his own little chapter in this here Special.  In flipping through it (today is the first time I've gotten to it), I just assumed this was a Lex Chapter.

Probably would've been able to give y'all a better "cover logo" if it were a Lex Chapter... there ain't all that much in the way of clean Sinbad logos out there... especially not for someone so inept at image manipulation as I!

Anyhoo, let's check it out!

--

We open at LexCorp, where Lex, Jr. is arriving for the day.  He's greeted by his bank of receptionists, secretaries, employees, and assistants... which includes a certain sister-of-Sinbad.  She thinks to herself how lucky she is to be working for the "nice" younger Luthor.  We follow Lex-da-Second into his office, where he dictates some notation into a very of-its-time tape recorder.  Ya see, he knows that this certain secretary is, in fact, Soraya Nassur... the sister of Davood Nassur, who is... ya know, Sinbad.  He laments the fact that, without Superman, there's been something of a "power vacuum" in Metropolis... and there are a group of bad guys calling themselves the "TerrorMasters" trying to establish themselves as that power.

Soraya leaves for lunch, where she is literally "picked up" by her brother.  Here's the thing... the people of Metropolis have been led to believe that Davood has been depowered, and has retired the Sinbad alter-ego.  We see here that, that's not entirely the case.

Davood and Soraya have themselves a picnic in the sky... which, I dunno, is that a little "on the nose"?  Ehh, nevermind.  The Nassurs chat about Davood's Sinbad powers... and it would appear that they're back, and better than ever.  While they dine, Davood offers Soraya some Tahini... like, an entire bowl of it.  Hmm.  Okay then.  Anyhoo, they talk about how nobody should know that the Sinbad powers are back.  Davood is confident that the secret is safe, however, since Luthor is involved... it should come as no surprise that that's not the way this story is going to go.

Soraya returns to the office, just as a bunch of packages have been delivered.  Her friend, Clarice is attending to the boxes, and is preparing to open 'em up.  Just then, a group of old dorks burst in... and hold the office up!  These must be... those dang TerrorMasters!  These goofballs are wearing these tiny domino-masks... I mean, that's their entire disguise.  What's more, one of them, the guy with the Cincinnati Reds cap, loses his mask during the robbery!  Anyhoo, they shoot Clarice thrice, and steal the packages.

Soraya wonders what was so important about these packages... and we learn that this Lex was continuing his father's weapons research... and those boxes contained what he refers to as "the most terrible weapon ever developed".  Welp... you'd almost assume someone would have to sign to have such a thing delivered, no?  Oh well, Lex laments the fact that this research has cost a human life... but, it's worth noting that he's smiling broadly when he says this.  Weird.  As this is going on, our man Davood is being fitted for an all-new super-hero costume, complete with a domino mask and cape!

That night, we join Sinbad and Soraya to a rather dumpy area of Metropolis where those "TerrorMasters" usually meet up.  I mean, TerrorMasters?  For real?  Okay.  Anyhoo, as they look on, that one dude whose mask fell off during the robbery saunters in... and they realize they're in the right place.  Inside, the baddies are assembling "the most terrible weapon ever developed" on a pool table.  Cincinnati Cap takes a look through the scope, and reveals (via thought balloon) that he's actually working for Lex Luthor.  Hmm...

Reds-Cap fires the blaster... resulting in blowing holes in several walls... kind of like you might see in a cartoon.  Then, just as they bad guys are celebrating the fact that nobody can stop them... Sinbad shows up!  And boy, does he look like a nerd or what?

Sinbad informs the bad guys that they're "all under arrest", which is just adorable.  He nails one of the baddies with an energy blast, however, forgets to protect-his-neck... and suffers a shot from "the most terrible weapon ever developed", which sends him flying out of the building!

Just then, like a Genie (Shazaam!), Lex Luthor's visage emerges from the barrel of "the most terrible weapon ever developed".  He informs the goofballs that they've now fired off two shots... which is all he accounted for them needing to take care of "whoever he gulled into attacking them"... and so, they've now outlived their usefulness.  Three-seconds later, dey go boom.

We wrap up with Sinbad, all safe and sound... having been knocked clear of the explosion.  He and Soraya leave the scene... however, Davood isn't entirely pleased with how everything went down.  While he doesn't seem especially bothered by the result, he's certain that Superman would have handled it far differently... and without casualty.  Fair enough!

--

Not bad!

I certainly wasn't expecting much from this one... but, found myself quite enjoying it!  Ya know, I think I gave this entire Legacy of Superman Special a pretty bad rap in dismissing it all these years.  So far, it's been really very good!  Really digging this new perspective on Metropolis as a city without Superman.

Let's look at Lex.  Dude seems... kinda bored without Superman around.  He still has to be the sort of puppet-master of the city, but since he's the "good" Luthor, can't be quite as overt about it.  I appreciate the lengths he goes to here in order to "wield power from the shadows".  While, it requires quite a few "happy accidents" to go as planned, it was still pretty satisfying that it did.

He had to "take care of" the, ahem, TerrorMasters... and spun a pretty good web to trap 'em in.  He knows their game... and their designs, and used them to his advantage.  Lex also doesn't mind young Davood winding up in the crossfire... the kid don't mean anything to him.  Just another casualty... in the wrong place, at the wrong time.

The "TerrorMasters".  Yeesh.  These old goofs look like they'd be more likely to be regaling people about that one time, back in high school, that they scored four touchdowns in a single game!  They don't exactly look up to the task of taking over the Metropolis underworld, do they?  I mean, they probably need to stop for multiple TUMS breaks during a given firefight.

Sinbad... not exactly the most stylish superhero, right?  Very dorky "costume"... if we can even call it that.  This would actually wind up being his fourth... and final appearance, ever!  That wasn't supposed to be the case, however... he was originally slated to make an appearance during the dirt-worst Superman story of all-time... Superman: Grounded!

Davood was supposed to make an appearance in Superman #712 (2011), during Chris Roberson's attempt at salvaging the Straczynski garbage-fire.  Davood was going to be all grown up and take the name "Sharif", which is a name with many meanings... I'm no expert, but from my research, those meanings include "honorable" and "noble", so a pretty great name for a superhero!

According to Roberson, this story had been turned in and approved by DC Comics.  The story, would have to do with Superman (still on his ridiculous walk across America) in Los Angeles, meeting with Sharif, who finds himself with quite the quandary.  He's a hero, who the public aren't completely keen to accept due to the fact that he is a Muslim.  Yeah, it's kind of "torn from the headlines", which I'm not always a fan of... but, this could make for an interesting chapter.  Certainly would have been more interesting than the Krypto story DC jammed into the schedule in its place!

DC got themselves some cold feet, and decided to pull the story... even though they'd already approved it!  What's more, according to the creative team, DC Editorial kind of dragged their feet about informing them all of the change!  Who'dathunkit?  DC Editorial not being forthcoming with information?  Perish the thought!  Though, in fairness... they (Editorial) probably didn't even have the foggiest idea that the Grounded storyline was still going on.  Clearly, they hadn't actually read an issue of Superman since JMS took over.  If they had, and still allowed Superman #701 to happen... they all deserve to be fired and black-balled from the industry.

Wait, where were we?  Oh yeah, Sinbad!  Even after DC decided to pull the story... they didn't even bother to change the solicit (barring the new Krypto cover).  Even more evidence of the right hand not knowing what the left hand's doing?  Here, take a look:

And, the letters page from Superman #711... the issue right before Sharif was set to show up!

Oh well, what could'a been.  Figure, for completion's sake, we'll wrap this up with Davood's Who's Who entry... 

Overall, a good story... and a real shame that Davood/Sinbad/Sharif never showed up again.

Tomorrow: Linearity

BONUS BOOK - Masters of the Universe (1982)

BONUS BOOK - Masters of the Universe (November, 1982)
"Fate is the Killer"
Writer - Paul Kupperberg
Pencils - Curt Swan
Inks - Dave Hunt
Letters - Ben Oda
Colors - Anthony Tollin
Editor - Dave Manak

Still recovering from Christmas, and so I decided to repurpose something I'd written a long while back... perhaps even seguing into the next iteration of this blog!

I've long wanted to discuss the old "Bonus Books" program that DC Comics ran back in the long ago... I wanna say the first time they tried it (in modern times... in an organized way) they just referred to the stories as "Insert Previews", and these ran from 1980-1983.  Then, post-Crisis we'd get a smattering of "Bonus Books".  I'm guessing many of us are familiar with these... it's always a treat digging through the cheap-o bins and suddenly coming across a book that feels twice as thick as it ought to be, and realizing there's likely an off-the-wall extra inside!  These are the things I'm kinda wanting to talk about for the next little while.

We're going to kick things off with the Masters of the Universe "Insert Preview" that ran in a whole lotta books with a November, 1982 cover-date.

This story ran in the following books:

• Action Comics #537
• All-Star Squadron #15
• Arak Son of Thunder #15
• Batman #353
• Captain Carrot and his Amazing Zoo Crew #9
• Daring New Adventures of Supergirl #1
• Detective Comics #520
• DC Comics Presents #51
• Firestorm #6
• Justice League of America #208
• Legion of Super-Heroes #293
• New Adventures of Superboy #35
• New Teen Titans #25
• Superman #377
• Warlord #63
• Wonder Woman #297

Hope you all enjoy!

--

We open with Metron Zodac riding the Cosmic Winds into Eternia.  He is there to save a single life... a life which very well might bring (and keep) peace to Eternia.  Though, he fears that he also might be damning them.  I dunno about you... but, I'd err on the side of caution... maybe sit this one out.

We hop inside Castle (Grayskull... I think?) where the Royal Court of Eternia is having a bit of a party.  The King and Queen wonder where their son, Prince Adam might be.  No sooner do they ask, than he saunters in with a "wench" on each arm.

(A mustache-less) Man-At-Arms ribs him about only having two "wenches", and suggests he's lost his touch at "wenching".  Suddenly, Zodac appears before them, with threats that Eternia's gonna go to pot, lest they produce their Greatest Champion.  Prince Adam hears him out... then runs off (with Cringer) to "change clothes".

He heads off to a cave... and (as He-Man... little disappointed we didn't get a scene of the change) chats up the Goddess.  She tells him that Zodac isn't a threat... he instead needs to focus on, you guessed it, Skeletor.  Duh.  Double duh.

Speaking of Skeletor... he, flanked by Beast-Man, is chatting up Mer-Man.  He asks the fishy fella to track down the other half of the Power Sword.  Rumor has it, it's in the deepest trench of the dark sea.  Fair enough.

We shift scenes to... Metropolis?  Well, that's unexpected.  Superman is delivering a crate of valuable electronics to the mainland from a broken down freighter.  He is suddenly attacked by a mustached octopus!  Maybe he took Man-At-Arms' 'stache!

They struggle for a bit... but Superman is distracted by a trio of glowing balls flying overhead.  He abandons the battle with the beastie to give chase.  He follows them into the drink, and gets caught up in a vortex.  Feels like we missed a few pages, doesn't it?

Back in Eternia, He-Man and Battle Cat meet Zodac.  He-Man asks his cosmic visitor to stand down, as he has no quarrel with him.  He's more interested in taking down Skeletor.  While you'd figure Zodac would be all-in with this plan... he ain't!  This, naturally... leads to a fight.

We rejoin Superman as he emerges from the water... only to find himself no longer on Earth, but in Eternia!  There was a portal underwater, donchaknow.  He recognizes it from the last time he visited (DC Comics Presents #47).  He knows Skeletor is behind everything... which, c'mon... who else it gonna be?

Speaking of Skeletor... he now has both halves of the Power Sword.  Yeah... this definitely feels like it's missing a grip of pages.  After pontificating a bit, he gives Beast-Man... what I can only describe as a "playful swat" on the tush with his Power Sword.  Superman than swoops in and steals'em both!

Rather than just running (flying) away with them, Superman throws 'em... one returns directly to Skeletor, the other somehow finds its way to He-Man's back.  This (somehow) ends the battle between he and Zodac.  We learn that Zodac is only fighting He-Man to keep him from getting to Skeletor, because he'd seen in the stars that such a meeting would result in He-Man's demise.  Undeterred, He-Man heads Skeletor-way.  Upon arrival, he sees that Skull-face has already defeated Superman... and is about to go for the killing blow.

He-Man and Skeletor attack each other at the same time... with He-Man actually impaling the baddie with his half of the Power Blade.  It manages to consume him... and sends him far away.  He-Man survives the blast he was hit with... and he, Superman, and Zodac celebrate their victory.  Yay?

--

Can't lie, folks... didn't much care for this.  Outside of having a handful of the action figures, I didn't really get into He-Man as a kid.  I'm sure I'd have dug this if I saw it back in 1982... keeping in mind, I was still a couple of years away from learning how to read at that point.

Today?  I dunno... it's just all over the place.  Pacing was shoddy-at-best... we get panel after panel of pontification, either by Zodac or Skeletor while important actual occurrences are left out altogether.  We always here that comics are about "showing, not telling"... but, that's certainly not what we get here.

I mean, we waste so much time with monologues... and we don't even get the "By the Power of Grayskull..." scene?  Lame.  Tying Superman into the story?  I guess it's neat to see him side-by-side with He-Man... but, his involvement didn't exactly rock my socks.

Reading this makes me remember that weird time back around the turn of the century, where all of those 80's properties were coming back in style.  I remember sorta "buying in" to that fad, and quickly coming to the conclusion that... outside nostalgia, there just wasn't much there for me.

The folks at Wizard certainly did their part to foment the post-speculation speculation (above)... I even checked through several of their price guides to see if this issue of Justice League of America got a "bump" for having the Masters of the Universe bit.  It didn't... but, that's not much of a surprise... the Wizard gang never seemed to give a rip about DC, unless Kevin Smith was writing something.

Overall...  if you're a fan of He-Man and the Masters of the Universe... you're probably going to want this too.  Won't break the bank in either case.  Many of the issues this story appears in are available digitally... and are listed as having "40 Pages", so there's a good chance this Bonus Book is included!

ACW #642 - Chapter 3 (of 4)

Action Comics Weekly #642 (Chapter III)
"Where There's a Will, Chapter III: The Summoning"
Writer - Elliot S! Maggin
Pencils - Curt Swan, Jim Aparo, & Jim Mooney
Inks - Ty Templeton, John Nyberg, Ian Akin, & Brian Garvey
Colors - Glenn Whitmore
Letters - John Workman
Editors - Mark Waid & Brian Augustyn

Well, here we are... the penultimate chapter of Action Comics Weekly!

Funny thing about that word... it feels like one that would be used incorrectly more often than not.  "Penultimate" just doesn't sound like it ought to mean "second-to-last" or whatever... it sounds like a much more meaningful word... almost "powerful" in a way.

Reminds me of words like "prolific"... which, I've come to find in my time online, is misused nearly every time I see it!

--

We open at an Eastern European seaport, where it looks as though there's about to be some sort of stand-off.  A mustachioed gentleman is brought in to try and diffuse the situation.  Ya see, this one fella's grandfather just got his pink slip, and he ain't handling it all that well.  As the negotiator enters the scene, he is struck by a green light.  Get used to that, it's going to happen a few more times!  We shift scenes over to, I wanna say New York City... where two rival gangs are about to square off.  One group is definitely being depicted as more "noble" than the other, they'd rather use their words (and perhaps a dance step or two) than weapons.

From outta nowhere, Nightwing bursts onto the scene!  He starts taking out members from the armed side of the fracas, before... getting struck with a green light.  Hmm...

Next stop, somewhere in California.  Guy Gardner is confronting an arms dealer... and in order to prove that this dude ain't nothin', Guy even removes his own Power Ring... and slips it on the dealer's finger!  Before he can kayo the creep, however, he is... dun-dun-dun, struck by a green light!

We now shift over to segregated South Africa, where an Arch Bishop is preparing to meet with a journalist about spreading the word.  Upon arrival, he is met with a vandalized church.  As he gives his statement, he is... struck by a green light.

Over in the U.K. (I'm guessing), there is a police stand-off going on.  The baddies are clad in balaclavas and are carrying some pretty heavy-duty firepower.  Before things can bubble over, our old friend Deadman arrives... and takes up residence in the body of one of the baddies!  Just then... you guessed it, he's struck by that green light.

Meanwhile, in North Dakota, a Native American gentleman named Rufus is out camping with his grandson.  Their camp is suddenly attacked by some sort of big cat (I can never tell 'em apart!).  Grampa Rufus leaps into action... and is struck by that green light!  This is starting to feel like Millennium!

In Metropolis, Clark Kent is doing some research into something going on concerning the New York Mets, when... duh, he's struck by the green light.  I thought we already established that he couldn't be a Green Lantern for this Sector?  Like, in this very issue!

Next stop, Beirut... where a hostage negotiator is freeing himself from captivity.  Rather than just quit while he's ahead and head for sweet freedom, he knows that his job won't be complete until he frees the rest of the captives.  He rushes toward his captors... and just as they open fire, he's struck by the green light.

Hail, hail, the gang's all here.  Time stands still for a moment, and the specter of Hal Jordan rises from his corpse to take a look at all of his potential replacements.  Before he gets too good'a look, he's met by another spirit vacating its body... Deadman.

Ol' Boston's all "Dude... you're about to die... how lucky are you?".  Hal still isn't sure exactly what's going on.  As Deadman tries to convince him to just "let it go", one of the line-up of Lantern candidates in stasis begins to stir.  Naturally, it's Clark Kent.  Now here's where some of our backstage shenanigans begin to rear their heads.  Clark introduces himself to Hal as someone who "interviewed him once".  Hmm.  So, with that line, it's been established that Hal Jordan no longer knows that Clark Kent and Superman are one in the same.  If you remember that bit from ACW #606... it was pretty clear they did know each other's secret!  Whatever the case, Clark is here to play the "angel" on Hal's shoulder in opposition to Deadman's "devil".

Hal's spirit flies around a bit, getting a better look at who's hand might soon be wearing his (er, Malvolio's) ring.  He can hardly believe that he beat these people out in the first place, considering their courage and resolve.  He asserts that his successor is his call to make... however, before he can commit to a pick... a "genie" emerges from his physical ring.

It's... Abin Sur!  Err, shouldn't it be Malvolio?  Or, at the very least Malvolio's Daddy?  Abin (a programmed response operation of the ring) talks... a lot.  Like, a lot - a lot.  What it all comes down to is... Hal's got a choice to make.  He can either live... or choose someone with a lesser will than he (remember, Hal's the top banana on Earth) to follow in his footsteps as this Sector's Green Lantern.

Taking advantage of the situation, Deadman takes this as his opportunity to convince Hal to "choose death".  Clark's all "Hey, hey, HEY... what is going on here?!" and tries to sway him the other way.  It's to the point where Boston and Clark are basically just arguing among themselves... and are barely paying any attention at all to Hal...

... who, at this very moment, rises to his (physical) feet.  As his would-be replacements blink back to their prior locations, it's make abundantly clear that Hal Jordan has chosen life.

--

Well, there we have it... Hal Jordan ain't dead after all!  Whole lotta weird build to get here though, wasn't it?  I mean, introducing all of these potential replacements?  It really did feel like those opening chapters of Millennium!  Which is to say, pretty dull... and ultimately unsatisfying!

We could talk about some of Hal's would-be successors... but, really... why?  Outside of the superheroes, these aren't folks we're going to run into again (though, we'll see 'em in the next chapter).  I do appreciate the "every day hero-ness" of the cast, which puts into perspective that Hal Jordan himself was chosen for the role while a civilian.

Something that stood out to me, and this is probably very "current year" of me, but... there were no women here!  Weird, right?  Nowadays, with the over-corrective nature of the comics industry, it'd probably be all women.

I dug Deadman and Superman playing the "angel/devil" on Hal's shoulders, trying to convince him of his next move.  They felt like the right characters to fill those roles.  Deadman, as a dude who's been stuck between life and death for so long, it would stand to reason that he'd be on the side of "letting go".  Superman, despite anything that J. Michael Straczynski wrote, is a character who values life.

I didn't like poor Malvolio getting jobbed out again.  There's no reason why Abin Sur would have been inside this particular Power Ring to confront Hal.  I guess that's just another indication that Hal's Action Comics exploits (outside of the death of Katma-Tui and the breakup with Arisia) are completely null and void!

Speaking of which... it looks like he no longer knows Superman's secret identity!  Ya see, that's kind of the entire reason why this story even exists!  The original ACW #642 was scripted by Neil Gaiman... who, did his due diligence... and ya know, read Action Comics Weekly!

That scene from Action Comics Weekly #606 ... again!

When he read (the oft-referred to) ACW #606, he took the conversation between Hal and Clark (as seen above... again) as the confirmation of Hal knowing Superman's secret ID in the post-Crisis DCU.  Editorial decided, some time in the interim, to reel back on the amount of folks who knew the Secret of Steel... buuuut, didn't fill in their freelancers.  When Neil turned in his script... which is very much a Hal/Clark "buddy" story, it got rejected!  Couldja imagine DC ever rejecting a Neil Gaiman story?  Well, it happened!  Pre-Sandman... but still... it happened!  Don't worry though, as mentioned... that story will eventually be told... but, that's for another day.

Overall... a bit of a long chapter here, with a whole lot of extra "stuff" that didn't feel necessary.  I understand and appreciate the need to "fill pages", especially when it's a fill-in script... and, even more especially when it's a Weekly title.  Nothing offensive, and the art was great!

Tomorrow: Let's wrap this bugger up!