Action Comics Weekly #634 (Phantom Stranger)
"Cat and Mouse, Chapter Four"
Writer - Paul Kupperberg
Art - Fred Carrillo
Letters - Dan McKinnon
Colors - Petra Scotese
Editor - Renee Witterstaettter
Let's wrap this one up...
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Picking up where we left off last time, the Phantom Stranger is stood before Tannarak, Tala, and the Cat-Beast. They exchange some pleasantries, before the Stranger accuses them of being slaves to the "Lords of Order"... I thought they were all about the Lords of Chaos? Are they the same thing? Maybe they are... I certainly don't have any interest in researching further. We learn that Cassandra Craft has been deposited in some Nether-Dimension, which is good enough for me. Elsewhere, Doctor Thirteen hails down a police car and points them toward the weird lightning storm atop the Empire State Building.
There, our baddies have the Phantom Stranger in a sort of stasis, preparing a ritual to summon the Lords of Chaos (I knew it was supposed to be Chaos!). So far, it looks like it's actually starting to work!
On the ground, Thirteen is stopped at the door. The police won't let him inside, and so... he socks an officer in the face. Yeah, right.
Back up top, it looks as though they're conducting some sort of psychic bloodletting or something. The Cat-Beast slashes at the Stranger's chest... and appears to be absorbing all of his magickal energies... or something.
After watching this go down for a few moments, Doctor Thirteen decides it's time to intervene... and he does so with, get this, a broom! He rushes into the scene... swinging a friggin' broom! What's more, it actually gets the job done! The Cat-Beast is knocked off the top of the building! I'm not sure if this is a statement on the innate power of mundane things (and people), but... this is pretty lousy.
The Stranger comes to his senses and judo-tosses Tannarak off the building, where he (and the still-hovering? Cat-Beast)... explodes? Wha-? Okay, so long as it ends the story, I ain't gonna complain. We wrap up with a portal opening, Cassie Craft rushing out, and we're happily ever after!
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I tell ya what... in the nearly four-years that I've been blogging every single day, there's only been one time I stopped reading something part way through out of absolute boredom. That was the The L.A.W. (Living Assault Weapons) mini-series from 1999. It was painfully dull, and I only made it halfway through. I sometimes feel bad about that, but... ya know what, I probably shouldn't.
While trying to get into this arc, I was feeling those same "L.A.W." pangs... I really just wanted to not talk about this story. I feel like I've built up enough goodwill that I might've been able to take a "Mulligan" on this one... and actually began writing a post to that effect. Basically, just a parody post of what I usually do here... just to keep myself entertained, because the story here... just wasn't doing the job.
I ultimately decided to play it straight... for better or worse. What we have here is... still wildly dull. For the amount of actual "story" we get, this could've easily been a done-in-one... two chapters, tops. Again though, ACW editorial was pretty weird around this time, what with all the changes in the air. For all I know, Paul Kupperberg had this written as a tight two-parter, and was told at the last minute that it had to fill four. Or, this was just a relic from a different "age" of comics that somebody found while cleaning out a filing cabinet in a storage room that hadn't been used in over a decade. Either way... this is perhaps the most skippable thing I've read as part of the Action Comics Daily project... and that covers a heckuva lot of ground.
Tomorrow: The Final Canary-ing
Action Comics Weekly #633 (Phantom Stranger)
"Cat and Mouse, Chapter III"
Writer - Paul Kupperberg
Art - Fred Carrillo
Letters - Dan McKinnon
Colors - Petra Scotese
Editor - Renee Witterstaetter
I can always tell when fall is in the air at the Palatial Christate because as the days grow shorter, I no longer have adequate natural morning light to write these pieces by... and so, I'm writing this morning at the ol' kitchen island.
Now, if only the temperatures outside would realize the fact that Summer's over!
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We pick up where we left off, for better or worse. The Phantom Stranger is tangling with Tannarak's Cat-Beast at the Bronx Zoo. Cassandra Craft and Terry Thirteen are outside the gates. After a bit of posturing... there's a lot of posturing in this arc... 'Rak and the Stranger look like they're about to trade blows. At this point, however, Cassie Craft has hopped the fence. At this point, the Stranger looks a bit catatonic... not sure why, maybe he's been exposed to this horrendously dull story too!
Next, we're at the top of the Empire State Building (or thereabouts), where Tannarak looks to summon forth the Power of *yawn* Chaos.
Suddenly, the Stranger realizes the artist and writer took the time to create this story focused around him, and so... he actually does something! He punches the Cat-Beast, and wrestles around the roof with him... until they both fall off. The Cat comes crashing down onto the streets below. Cassie and Tannarak exchange an oddly "knowing" glance.
Tannarak heads down to get between the Beast and the Stranger, while pointing toward the skies. It looks like Cassandra has been caught between Chaos and New York City... crazy, but true.
Now, instead of helping his lady-love... err, lady-like... I dunno. I've never seen this woman before. Anyhoo, instead of helping her, the Stranger has a think on it... then proceeds to blast her with his Phantomy energies.
Ya see, the Phantom Stranger's "sanity" has returned... and he now realizes that this woman is not in fact Cassandra Craft, but instead Tala Whatsherface!
--
Hoo boy, but this is boring.
This almost had to be some sort of long-lost inventory story, right? Like, it was probably supposed to run as an Action-Plus backup feature back in 1978, but got lost in a drawer or something? Because this is just not up to the standards Kupperberg set with the Stranger in his earlier ACW appearances... those were interesting, this... is not.
Thankfully, this... like most of ACW's offerings... is a, say it with me, penultimate chapter. The Stranger will join us on the other side of The Crash of '88!, but it won't be this story... and that, my friends, is a good thing.
Tomorrow: Penultimate Blackhawking!
Action Comics Weekly #632 (Phantom Stranger)
"Cat and Mouse, Chapter II"
Writer - Paul Kupperberg
Artist - Fred Carrillo
Letters - Albert DeGuzman
Colors - Petra Scotese
Editor - Renee Witterstaetter
After the tremendous highs of finally meeting Lord Malvolio yesterday to... some gaudy dude who looks like he just escaped Marvel Limbo to rattle the Phantom Stranger's cage. Action Comics Weekly certainly works in mysterious ways...
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We pick up right where we left off... Tannarak has crashed the party, and is not ominously pointing at our hero. We learn that, last time these two met (whenever that was), the Stranger was able to destroy ol' 'Rak... however, the Lords of Chaos were able to put Humpty Dumpty back together again. Doctor Thirteen stands by, being all incredulous... like, annoyingly so. Thankfully, Cassandra suggests he kindly shut uppa his face.
The Stranger chases Tannarak out of the apartment, and advises Terry and Cassie against following them. Yeah, like that's gonna work! Our hero tries to get Tannarak to fight him fairly, however, the baddie reminds him that he is indeed... a baddie, and proclaims that he'd rather fight dirty. Oh boy. As this chase continues, Cassandra dupes a cabbie into "following those glowing men in the sky".
Turns out the chase made it all the way from the East Side of Manhattan to the Bronx Zoo. Now, Tannarak is surrounded by the entirety of their large cats exhibit. After some cliche pleasantries are exchanged, he begins casting a spell.
Doctor Thirteen and Cassandra Craft hop the fence, and arrive just in time to see... well, Tannarak transform all of the Zoo Critters into a fairly generic-looking feline demon beast thing.
--
Well...
I never thought I'd be saying this, but... I think I found a story that might be best told in the two-page "Sunday Strip" format! This is... just painfully dull. A throwback, without any of the charm.
A shame, really... considering our last few ACW "visits" with the Phantom Stranger have been quite strong! This feels like something that had been lining an editor's drawer for... probably over a decade? I'm not saying that's what happened... but, it wouldn't surprise me to learn that it had! It makes Action Comics Weekly look and feel like a sort of "clearing house"... which, heck, for all I know, is exactly what they were using it for this late in the game!
Whatta we got here? Tannarak acts like the most generic of villains... and summons his "son" the Cat Beast to destroy the Phantom Stranger? All the while, Dr. Thirteen won't shut his gob about the impossibility of everything going on? Dude... you live in the DC Universe, get over it.
Anyhoo... story could've probably been told (better) in eight-panels rather than eight-pages... but, whattayagonnado?
Tomorrow: A different kind of "Cat" strikes...
Action Comics Weekly #631 (Phantom Stranger)
"Cat and Mouse, Chapter 1"
Writer - Paul Kupperberg
Art - Fred Carillo
Letters - Albert DeGuzman
Colors - Petra Scotese
Editor - Renee Witterstaetter
And, taking the place of the Secret Six... ladies and gentleman, I present to you: The Phantom Stranger. Not only is it a Phantom Stranger tale, it's going to be an entire story arc! Hrmm... maybe I should've gotten a running start...
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We open in New York City where there seems to be something of a plague of cats roaming the streets. They all gather around Cassandra Craft, who I'm assuming is someone I probably ought to recognize. She is then attacked by yet another person I probably ought to know... Tala, Mistress of Darkness! It would appear that Cassie had been blinded, but again... I wouldn't have the foggiest idea how, when, or why. Elsewhere, the Phantom Stranger and Doctor Terrence Thirteen play chess.
Thirteen isn't quite sure why the Stranger wanted to hang out this evening, and during their conversation manages to lay out exactly why characters like the Phantom Stranger never seem to work for me. He says of the Stranger, "You pop out of nowhere, do your magic, and then disappear--", and yeah, that's just about the size of it! The chat is interrupted by a powerful psychic something or another emanating from the door... when the Stranger answers it, it's... duh, Cassandra.
We're briefly invaded by a flood of their shared memories. We learn that they'd once faced off with Tala and, not to get too far ahead of ourselves, a fella called Tannarak. After the battle, Cassie was blinded and left to believe that the Phantom Stranger had been destroyed. Little did she realize, he just took this as an opportunity to slum it on the East Side getting to learn about the human condition.
The next two pages were laid out of order, which made this already rocky read for me all that much more confusing the first time through. We'll just cover it the way it was intended. Cassandra informs the Stranger of Tala's return... which catches him off guard. Dr. Thirteen is incredulous about the whole deal, and is kind of a jerk about it.
The Stranger retires to a darkened room so he can engage in some psychic search, but comes up empty... that is, until Tannarak bursts into the apartment!
--
Welp... this was the sort of story I was worried we'd get every time the Phantom Stranger feature popped up in Action Comics Weekly. A kind of dully, over-dialogued slog. The last few times we bumped into him, the stories have had a more experimental feel to them, here though... it's like I grabbed a random eight-pages out of a random Bronze-Age Marvel Essentials volume.
In reading this, I actually got pangs of trying to fight my way through the first Essential Defenders volume just trying to get to that fun and esoteric Steve Gerber stuff I'd heard so many good things about. There, as here, It was just characters (or takes on characters) that I didn't care much about, pedestrian art, and a feeling like what I was reading didn't actually matter. Not bad, but dull... and could've been so much better (as Paul Kupperberg has shown us).
We've got four or five more weeks with the Stranger (he'll actually survive the upcoming Crash of '88! crossover, hopefully this one picks up adequate steam and interest before long. I know this character and sort of story can speak to a great number of comics fans, but I'm sorry, I ain't one of 'em! Speaking of which...
Tomorrow: Superman... actually in-costume!
Ghosts #100 (May, 1981)
"The Ghost Gladiator: The Blackmailed Spirit"
"The Ghost Gladiator: Spectral Dream"
"The Ghost Gladiator: The Phantom's Final Debt"
"Hands from the Grave"
Writer - George Kashdan
Pencillers - Fred Carrillo & M.D. Bright
Inkers - Fred Carrillo & Vince Colletta
Letterers - Esphidym Mahilum & Shelly Leferman
Colorists - Jerry Serpe & Bob LeRose
Editor - Jack C. Harris
Cover Price: $0.50
Welcome to day three of the big October special. I've taken to referring to it as "Boo, Haunted Blog!"... which, yeah... it's lame, but I kinda dig it. Plus, it gives me a way to catalog all these scaaaary stories. So, like... the next time you're huddled around a campfire, just pull out your tablet and click the #boohauntedblog tag. Your friends will be sure to thank you... for the sleep-aid, if nothing else...
Anyhoo... onward and upward to our Ghostly tales...
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Heyyy... it's the one-hundredth issue of Ghosts... let's celebrate by checking out the covers of past landmark issues... and ask ourselves if we still believe.
Our first chapter this issue opens at an archaeological dig site. Old coot and digmaster supreme, Sir Alex Quayle confides in his (relatively) young aide, Ernest Langford that he has been seeing ghosts. Just then, he gets the bejeezus scared out of him by an apparition while Ernie can't seem to see it. Sir Alex has himself a bit of an episode, and passes out.
Later that night, Alex wakes up. He thinks to himself that what he saw couldn't have been a hallucination... and begins wandering around the site. That's smart, right? Anyhoo... he walks past Ernie's tent to hear him in the midst of an argument. Alex throws open the flap, and finds that Ernie was arguing with the g-g-ghost... for, ya see... he wanted the ghost to scare poor Sir Alex into retirement so that he may take over the dig! Good plan!
Sir Alex asks how Ernie was able to pull it off... rather than tell him, Langford pulls a gun on the oldster! He takes him, by gunpoint to a building in a remote corner of the site, where through a window they find an ancient Pompeiian gladiator laying in perfect condition... preserved, and alive! But how? You may be asking... well, ya see when Vesuvius erupted, the lava coated this building and hardened... leaving it airtight!
The g-g-ghost is the Pompeiian gladiator, who only agreed to help Ernest if he would break the window and allow his body to die. Now, however, Ernie has raised the stakes. He will free the ghostiator only if it kills Sir Alex! The ghost is all "screw that" and refuses. Amid the quarrel, Alex picks up a stone and throws it right through the airtight window. The apparition reenters his body... and finally dies.
Our second chapter opens during World War II in... you guessed it, Pompeii. German Captain Lothar Von Koenig notices that the Italian soldiers are surrendering in large number. He decides to wait until the Americans arrive in Pompeii... and then blow the entire city up. Dang... that's hardcore.
I guess I'm not the only one that thinks so, as a German soldier crosses enemy lines to tip off an American fleet to the boom-boom in Pom-Pom. The Colonel ain't buying what ol' Himmel is selling, and decides that they'll proceed into Pompeii anyway.
Corporal Haskell pleads with the Colonel to heed the German's warning. He states that he is, by profession, an archaeologist, and would hate to see so much history destroyed. The Colonel gives Haskell one night to reconnoiter the terrain and report back.
Our man Haskell... ehh, he ain't no Solid Snake. Just moments after entering Pompeii he is spotted by the German's. They chase him into a house, and fire off a few shots... with one grazing his head. He lay unconscious for a time, before waking up when a spear hits the wall by his head. He finds himself in ancient Pompeii! A Gladiator stands before him... like the one in Sir Alex Quayle's diary... hey, we know him! The Gladiator shows him the secret passageway out. In time, he really wakes up... and uses the passageway he learned about while out-cold.
Haskell reports back to camp, and tells the Colonel that he found underground passages they could use to get a jump on the Nazis. The G.I.'s claim Pompeii, and everything's cool! We close with Haskell showing the Colonel where he had his dream... and he finds that spear he dreamed about embedded in the wall... Whoa...
In our third chapter, we join a museum reenactment of Mount Vesuvius doin' it's thing all over Pompeii. The attendees all comment on how realistic the exhibit looked.
We meet Walter B. Fraser, the man behind the exhibit. He reveals that the entire works was done via holographic hooziwhatsits. Later, he is met by his girlfriend Alexandra. She is upset that he didn't mention that she helped him with much of the exhibit... and so she shoots him. No wait a minute... somebody else shoots him... right in the back. He collapses to the ground.
The man with the gun shows himself and demands Alexandra give him the key to a silverworks display. Before she can act... the ghost of a gladiator appears! He chases the gunmen, and he flees... up the phony Vesuvius? Yeah, that's not smart. Guess what... he falls in... and dies. The woman? Alexandra-- Quayle! The Gladiator Ghost just payin' it forward. The End.
Wait... there's another story in here? It's a shorty... here goes... A man has his hands chopped off after slapping a Middle-Eastern Sheik. He would then be executed... handless!
From that point on, the Sheik is haunted by terrifying nightmares consisting of... haunted hands... He imagines them choking him. He struggles to remove them from around his throat... but to those around him, it just looks like he's choking himself... to death! Now, that's impressive stamina!
We close out on the executed fellow in his casket... with both hands and a broad smile on his face.
--
This wasn't nearly as bad as I feared it might be. I was fully prepared to groan my way through this review portion... but, it was a pretty decent book. The art was very nice all throughout, and the story/stories were pretty neat. While I was reading through this, I wasn't paying attention to the story titles... I figure, this is an anthology book... and totally glossed over the fact that the first three stories were part of the same series. When the Gladiator appeared to the American Soldier in Pompei, I was actually a bit surprised. It totally enhanced the story for me... and had I been more vigilant in my "title reading" I don't think it would have had the same effect.
I will say... this issue did drag on a bit. Once I finished with the Gladiator story, I was ready to put the book down... only to find that the Haunted Hand story was there. I know it's ridiculous to complain about extra content... especially in the comics era we now live in, where certain companies have tried selling us 16 pages of story for upwards of four and five bucks, but I did find myself feeling a bit of morality-play-disguised-as-horror-story fatigue by then.
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