X-Lapsed, Episode 361 - FCBD 2022: Avengers/X-Men #1 (2022)

X-Lapsed, Episode Three Hundred Sixty-One

Free Comic Book Day 2022: Avengers/X-Men #1 (June, 2022)
Free Comic Book Day 2022: Spider-Man/Venom #1 (June, 2022)
"Of Deviation and Mutation"
"Let's Talk About Krakoa..."
"Lost in the Mail"
Writers - Kieron Gillen, Gerry Duggan, & Zeb Wells
Art - Dustin Weaver, Matteo Lolli, & John Romita, Jr.
Inks - Scott Hanna
Colors - Marte Gracia, Rain Beredo, & Marcio Menyz
Letters - VC's Cory Petit, Clayton Cowles, & Joe Caramagna
Design - Jay Bowen
Edits - Biro, Cohick, McGahey, Amaro, Bissa, Lowe, White, Brevoort, Cebulski
Cover Price: FREE
Available: May 7, 2022

Welcome to AXE-Lapsed!

Kicking off the X-Lapsed coverage of the Summer-into-Fall, 2022 Crossovent, AXE: Judgment Day!  Today, we're taking a look at three short subjects from two of Marvel's 2022 Free Comic Book Day offerings - two from FCBD 2022: Avengers/X-Men #1 and one story with a surprise X-Twist from FCBD 2022: Spider-Man/Venom #1!

All three stories are fun... and offer your humble host some (uncharacteristic?) optimism about the near future of the X-Books!  Also: I willingly eat a bit of crow when I admit that Marvel (and DC) finally used the FCBD opportunity to actually deliver the goods... and reward reader loyalty!

Plus: A great Mailbag section!

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X-Lapsed, Episode 110 - X-Men Free Comic Book Day 2020

X-Lapsed, Episode One Hundred Ten

X-Men: Free Comic Book Day 2020 (May, 2020)

Writers - Jonathan Hickman & Tini Howard

Art - Pepe Larraz

Colors - Marte Gracia

Letters - VC's Clayton Cowles

Design - Tom Muller

Edits - Bissa, White, Cebulski

Cover Price: FREE

Release Date: July 15, 2020

We're on the Eve of #EcksofTens... and, we're about to be taken to school.  It's time to look at the Dawn of X offering for 2020's Free Comic Book Day... which, leads to your humble host angrily shaking his fist at the clouds about how halfhearted and throwaway so many FCBD issues are!  The one we're covering today is... well, it's something.  We'll do our best!

Also: More X-Cellent (and X-istential) Listener Mail!

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@acecomics / @cosmictmill / weirdcomicshistory@gmail.com

chrisandreggie.podbean.com

chrisisoninfiniteearths.com

xlapsed.chrisisoninfiniteearths.com/

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Dear Justice League (FCBD) #1 (2019)

Dear Justice League (FCBD) #1 (May, 2019)
"Dear Superman"
"Dear Hawkgirl"
Story - Michael Northrop
Art - Gustavo Duarte
Colors - Marcelo Maiolo
Letters - Wes Abbott
Cover Price: FREE

After the absolute slog that was this past week's coverage of Flash Forward, I decided to follow-up with something just a bit "lighter".

You might notice that this is a Free Comic Book Day book... and, if you've followed my work for any amount of time, you might already have an idea how I feel about Free Comic Book Day.  It's a nice concept... with often lousy execution.  We'll talk more about that below the dashes... but, for now, I'll give DC Comics a thumbs up for knowing the temperature of the average FCBD "consumer".

Let's do it.

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Our first story is called "Dear Superman", and... well, features some kid texting Superman.  That's what kids do nowadays right?  You know what they say, "kids be textin'!"... or, something... how the hell would I know?  Anyhoo, this kid has made a real mess of things... looks like he's destroyed a lawnmower, a sprinkler, and somehow got himself covered in light blue paint (unless that's supposed to be water).  Whatever the case, he's really interested to learn if even the Man of Steel might've made a mistake or two in his life.

Superman gets the text... and, sorta "p'shaws" it away.  I mean, Superman, mess something up?  Never!  Naturally, he immediately flies headfirst into a building.  Err, make that "back-first"... though, you really gotta be trying to mess up that badly.

Anyhoo, ramming the building causes a window-washer on the other side of the building to come loose... and so, Superman now has to save a fella he put into danger through his own lack of attention.  He saves the dude... but, unfortunately, he neglects to snag the vindow-viper's bucket'a water.

The bucket narrowly misses a snobby-looking woman... who, startled by the nearby splash, walks right into this other pedestrian... nearly knocking him right into the middle of the street.

The fella manages to catch his bearings... but then, trips over an inconvenient #2 Pencil that just so happens to be laying in the gutta'!  C'mon, that's not Superman's fault, is it?  The poor dude falls squarely on his butt.

A bicyclist narrowly misses the man, but swerves right into the path of an oncoming truck!  The hell?  This is getting a li'l bit darker than I thought.  Thankfully (for him) Superman managed to swoop in just in the nick of time.

Unfortunately for another Metropolitan, the wheel from his bike went "brong!" "brong!" "brong!", bouncing right into her direction.  Ya see, she's a dog-walker, and is... well, walking dogs.  She's also picking up after dogs, ya see... cuz, kids these days seem to be really big fans of poop.

This rogue bike wheel hits her with such force... it might've just impregnated her.  I mean, that was a direct shot.

The poop goes flying (remember, kids love poop!), the dogs go runnin'... and wouldn'tcha know it, a cat just so happens to be running by!  Superman manages to wrangle up the dogs, and return them to their now-aching walker.

The cat, however, continues its reign of terror across Metropolis... and, mercifully, the creators use short-hand to illustrate this path of rage.

We wrap up with Superman getting a ticket for "texting while flying" (nyuk, nyuk, nyuk), and finally responding to the kid from the beginning with the admission that, yeah... even Superman messes up every now and again.

Our second story in this little preview edition is "Dear Hawkgirl".

It opens with Kendra returning back to the Hall of Justice after a successful mission.  After greeting Cyborg and making her way through the JLA's retina-scan, she retires to her room to go online for a little (er, long) while.  Worth noting, there appears to be a bit of a Mo Willems Pigeon homage on her wall here, which is pretty neat.

After several hours of surfin', she finally checks her e-mail... and, what she finds is a doozy of an awkwardly-worded question.  Young (I assume/hope) Haley Lu comments that Hawks EAT small mammals, and asks if Hawkgirl does to.  Kendra instinctively peers over at her hamster cage... 

... she gets up from her seat, and slowly walks over to her pet... and it looks like she's really considering taking a bite.  Nahhhh... It's all a swerve (bro), she's just heading over to FEED her hamster, not feed ON it.

She hops back on her laptop and answers the electronic missive.  She doesn't EAT small mammals... she FEEDS them!  I have a sneaking suspicion she's just fattening the little beastie up though.

--

Alrighty, during the pre-ramble I gave DC Comics a big ol' "thumbs up" for putting this out as part of their Free Comic Book Day offerings.  Now, that doesn't mean I liked this... or even thought it was all that good.  It's just an acknowledgement that DC Comics knows how to use FCBD efficiently.  They know that most of the people who dare to darken the doorway of a comic shop that one Saturday in May will either a) never come back, or b) only come back the next time the day starts with the word "Free".  For the most part, these are not people who will return week after week for another "fix".  They're in the store so they can take a picture, hashtag it, and get a half-dozen likes on their Instagram Page because "lol, so nerdy".

I guess what I'm trying to say here is, Free Comic Book Day is a wasted effort, folks.  The Big Companies know this... which is why their offerings over the past several years have been trash.  Barely anybody's bringing their A-Game for a freebie that will most likely wind up laying on the floorboard of the car until you remember to throw it out.  At least with something like this, a parent/grandparent might see it, and then go to an actual bookstore (or, if we're being realistic, Amazon) to buy their child this "age-appropriate" graphic novel... which the child will likely look at once.

Does this help comics retail... or the industry at large?  Hell no.  It's not breeding "life long" fans... or, heck, even short-term ones!  It's a way of selling one book, one time... to people who have zero interest in comic books (and likely never will).  It's not like DC (or any of the big companies) really need to appeal to or entice us to make an extra trip to the shop... we're already there anyway.  Again though... thumbs up for not just handing out a twice-out-of-continuity reprint of something with Harley Quinn on the cover!  Because those help NOBODY.

As for the stories we looked at here... they're cute.  I'm not going to go into any sort of analytical detail, because... I'm a forty-year old idiot, these weren't written for me.  All I'll say is they're something I'd imagine a first or second-grader might find humorous... nothing wrong with that.  However...

If we look at the full-page ad for the full-size Dear Justice League (included below), you can see that this is advertised as "A new middle grade graphic novel"... I think we're really selling many "Middle Graders" short with stuff like this.  A quick search of the ol' internet tells me that "Middle Grade" usually refers to like 4th through 8th grade.  Thinking back to my own "middle grade" years (and, yeah this is just me being "anecdotal")... Superman died, Batman was broken, Venom was routinely doing horrible stuff to Spider-Man... warts and all, comics didn't talk to you like you were an idiot.

I was reading about Doomsday and Superman fighting across the country back in 1992... a kid that same age today is reading about Hawkgirl giving "nom noms" to her pet hamster?  Back then, Bane was running Batman through a hellish gauntlet, that ended with him snapping the Bat's Back across his knee.  A kid that same age today is giggling as a pooper scooper... full'a poop... goes flying?

I guess I shouldn't really comment... I'm not a 2020 kid... but, boy howdy, am I happy I grew up when I did!  Then again, if I grew up nowadays I definitely wouldn't have this crushing comics habit... so ya take the good, ya take the bad.

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Superman: War of the Supermen #0 (2010)

Superman: War of the Supermen #0 (June, 2010)
"War of the Supermen, Prologue"
"Filling in the Blanks"
Writers - James Robinson & Sterling Gates
Pencillers - Eddy Barrows, Julian Lopez, Aaron Lopresti, David Finch, Gary Frank, Cafu, Ethan Van Sciver & Diogenes Neves
Inkers - J.P. Mayer, Bit, Joe Weems & Vicente Cifuentes
Colorists - Rod Reis, Blond
Letterer - John J. Hill
Assistant Editor - Wil Moss
Editor - Matt Idelson
Free Comic Book Day

Today we're gonna look at one of my, relatively-recent Superman blind spots... and I'm going to complain about contemporary Free Comic Book Day offerings.

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We open with a rather peeved off Superman bursting through a wall.  He has arrived at a Kryptonian Military Installation located one mile below the surface of New Krypton.  He's there to... you guessed it, talk to Zod.  Can't have a Krypton story without him... unfortunately.  To fill us in a bit, Zod was made General of New Krypton's army (seems a stellar idea, don't it?)... and Superman had left Earth for a time to serve in that army... and make sure Zod doesn't act all Zoddy.

Speaking of acting "Zoddy", Superman is here to confront the big Z has because he's declared war on Earth.  The two exchange punches for a bit, until Ursa (who I initially mistook for Zaora) slashes Superman across the chest with a Kryptonite knife!  She claims it hurts to even hold the thing, but the satisfaction wielding it brings outweighs the pain.

Superman blasts the knife away with heat vision before once more, stepping to Zod.  Zod's having a grand old time, and brings Superman up to speed, advising him he was about to surrender... and I am pleasantly surprised and thankful Robinson and Gates didn't resort to using this to shoehorn a "hilarious" "Kneel before..." reference.  As Superman approaches, he is crushed from above by the body of Non (who I mistook as Quex-Ul).  Zod always seems to have one big dude and one lady as his seconds.

With Ursa and Non holding Superman at bay, Zod reminds him that on New Krypton, he's no "super" anything... he's simply one of one-hundred thousand... all with the same powers.

He continues running through his justification for the war declaration.  It appears General Sam Lane and his spies were responsible for the death of Supergirl's father, Zor-El.  Zod's own spies claimed to have uncovered Earth/Sam Lane's own plans to declare war on New Krypton... before they were killed.  It all feels very he said/he said... but whattayagonnado?  Zod does wrap up his monologue by ensuring Superman that this isn't just about New Krypton's safety/sovereignty... it's also personal.  He hates the House of El, and is still looking for revenge.  If he can destroy Kal-El's adoptive home, and kill everyone he holds dear... well, that's all the better.

Superman breaks free, swearing to stop Zod before he can initiate the plan.  As Ursa and Non tackle our man again, Zod just laughs and goes all Ozymandias on us... ya can't stop what's already happened, Clark... everybody knows that.

Our back-up is framed around Lois Lane writing a story for the Daily Planet... nothing we haven't seen before.  This is pretty good stuff though... it serves to fill all of us Johnny-DC-come-latelies (and, read-this-stuff-so-long-agos,-we-can't-remember-what-happeneds) in on the New Krypton clusterschmazz.  Of course, we open with a page telling us about that fateful day a rocket was sent from Krypton with a "baby on board" placard.  Seems we can't go more than an issue and a half anymore without reading about that.

We jump ahead years later to Superman and Supergirl rescuing the Bottle City of Kandor from Brainiac.  Upon enlarging it, they discovered 100,000 new Kryptonian brothers and sisters.  Humans would invade the city (Which apparently wasn't destroyed-to-dust upon enlargement like the first time this story happened) and Supergirl's father Zor-El would be killed.  This led to Zor-El's wife Alura creating a new planet for the Kryptonians... a New Krypton, if you weeeeell.

For protection, these New Kryptonians would turn to... no, not Superman... General freaking Zod.  Ya kinda get what you deserve sometimes, right?  I don't understand the logic of grabbing a fella you imprisoned... for e-ter-ni-ty... and asking him to protect you.  Gotta figure there might be some sour grapes there, no?  Anyhoo, this is where Superman decides to move to the new planet, and join its army.

While away from Earth, Superman made arrangements for his adoptive home to be protected.  This crew includes, Kon-El, Mon-El (and, I just realized their names are only one letter apart!), Steel, Krypto, the Guardian, and Nightwing and Flamebird.

Lois next discusses Project 7734, which is a military black-ops organization focused on countering potential alien invasions.  It is being run by her father, ol' General Lane.  She talks about some of the operatives, which includes some 1st Issue Special love in Atlas... also, Lois' own sister Lucy Lane is now somehow a "Kryptonian killing machine" going by the name Superwoman.  I don't remember that at all.

She begins to wrap up her article, discussing the death of her pal and co-worker, Jimmy Olsen!  It appears he "got too close" while investigating Project 7734, and was found at the bottom of the harbor.  If only that were true... because a few panels later (a still wet?) Jimmy arrives with all the information Lois was looking for.  He claims that Natasha Irons rescued him and kept him out of sight (but not dry).  Now, Lois can learn the whole truth about her father.

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Man, whatever happened to DC Free Comic Book Day issues that meant a damn?  All we get these days are garbage reprints with zero context aimed at people who only go to the comic shops one day a year... if they remember "which Saturday in May" they get free crap handed to them.

This is how ya do it!  What a great way to kick off a story... a free issue front-loaded with prologue, and back-loaded with everything you might need to jump into the impending event.  Both stories promise "to be continued... in four days".  If you wanna get readers (new, old, lapsed, whatever) interested and excited, this is the way to go.  You don't promise something "in thirty days" or "Summer 2017" or with a nebulous "Next", you give them less than a week.  You remind some of them that comic book shops are open more than one day a year... and you also catch shop regulars who may not necessarily be into Superman... but decide to give him a go after checking this out.  It's crazy, it's almost as though DC thought this one out!

For the story itself... well, it's called a prologue and that's precisely what it is.  We learn of our threat... and it ramps up to the point where it's about to boil over.  A great bit of storytelling that sets the stage for whats to come.  I'm still no fan of Zod... I find him kind of a bore.  I'm just thankful there were no requisite cutesy "Kneel before..."s in here.

The backup was really well done, even if framing a story with "writer writing about something" is a bit tropey.  I suppose things become that way for a reason.  This worked well for me, as a lapsed reader... who, if I'm being honest, walked away from the Superman books early/mid-New Krypton... so a bunch of this was new to me.

The art throughout the issue was another high point.  Another really good use of the platform (and opportunity) that Free Comic Book Day can (and should) be.  I hope I'm not coming across too angry (or old-manny) sounding here, I just feel pretty strongly about using things like FCBD as ways to promote comics and comic shops... not whatever movie might be coming out.  Contemporary "throwaway" offerings, like an issue of Suicide Squad without context or a half-decade old (and no longer in continuity) issue of Action Comics are part of why I sometimes refer to the event as "Pretend you care about Comics Day".

Overall, if I were to have read this during that weekend in May, 2010... I'd be totally psyched to check out the War of the Supermen and the entire New Krypton schmazz.  Having read it in 2017... I only wish I had the time to!  If you're interested in checking this one out, you've got no excuse not to... it's available digitally FOR FREE!

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513

The New 52: Futures End #0 (2014)

The New 52: Futures End #0 FCBD Special Edition (June, 2014)
Writers - Brian Azzarello, Jeff Lemire, Dan Jurgens & Keith Giffen
Pencillers - Ethan Van Sciver, Patrick Zircher, Aaron Lopresti, Jurgens & Jesus Merino
Inkers - Art Thibert, Mark Irwin & Dan Green
Art Consultant - Keith Giffen
Colors - Hi-Fi
Letters - Carlos Mangual
Assistant Editor - Kyle Andrukiewicz
Editor - Joey Cavalieri
Group Editor - Matt Idelson
Cover Price: FREE

As I rapidly approach one solid year of daily blogging, I figured I may as well discuss one of the books that brought me back into the "Greater DC Universe" fold.  When this book was announced, it was rumored that it would ultimately lead to a return to the old (er, real) DCU.  I was down to my last few titles and was planning on dropping DC altogether, but I'll go into further depth after the usual spoilery synopsis.

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We open in Central City, 35 years from whenever you read this.  An aged Flash is working alongside some of his Rogues... and he enters their compound with his quickness.  It is revealed that he is running from... Wonder Woman... at least it's something that resembles Wonder Woman.  It is made (relatively) clear that she has been assimilated by Brother Eye... and is looking to "spread the love".  She chops off Captain Cold's hands, and the Flash proceeds to pound her into the ground.

After regaining his bearings, the Flash finds himself stood before... Frankenstein.  He gives Flash the choice of joining Brother Eye, or... ya know, dying.  Flash tells Frank to eff-off, which leads to the big guy opening his vest... revealing Black Canary's head grafted to his chest.  Her sonic scream turns Barry (I think it's Barry) to dust.

We next get a look at many DC Universe locales in this sorta-kinda far-flung future... Brother-Eyed folks have, for most intents and purposes, taken over the Earth.  In Metropolis, we join Green Lantern John Stewart and Blue Beetle Jaime Reyes running through the sewers.  Outside we see several assimilated heroes, including Booster Gold.  Jaime is the first to fall.

John looks like he might be able to hold his own... but then, Superman shows up.  It's pretty much academic from there.

Next up, we join the oddball team of Grifter and Amethyst.  They have been tasked by Bruce Wayne to infiltrate the Brother Eye... Compound (?) and disconnect Firestorm, which would sever its link to the assimilated heroes via satellite uplink... or something.  They run afoul of Superman and the newly cybery-John Stewart... and get atomized pretty quick.

We shift to the man who gave them the task... Bruce Wayne, at Wayne Manor.  He is alongside Terry McGinnis, ya know... that other Batman... from the cartoon.  Anyhoo, Bruce is planning on going back in time to stop this dark future from happening.

Before he can, however, the Assimilated Batmen of All Nations infiltrate the Manor... and before we know it, it's a pretty bad time.  The Knight slices off Bruce's right arm before he can hop into the time-travel portal device.

Terry is able to better the Batmechs, and heads over to tend to Bruce.  He is given the time-travel watch thingie, and instructed to stop this Brother Eye present, by heading to the past... and so he does.  Next thing we know, Batman Beyond is standing in Times Square, five years from now!

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Well... this was, interesting... right?  I remember really not knowing what to make of it... but felt as though it wasn't so ingrained in "New 52ness" that I could still get something out of it.  Like I mentioned in the preamble, in early 2014 I was down to about 4-5 DC books a month... and I was only really enjoying Justice League.  Batman was kind of hit or miss for me... though, definitely more hit than miss... but I still could've dropped it without losing much sleep over it.

With Futures End, there was that rumor... as slight as it might've been, that the weekly series was going to end with either the return of the Multiverse... or simply a return to the pre-Flashpoint DCU.  Well, that was enough for me.  Suddenly I was sorta-kinda back with DC... even picking up other titles I didn't normally read if I felt there was the slightest possibility that there'd be some "old" DC hinted at... which kinda paid off during that Superman: Doomed storyline...

Overall, this issue wasn't half bad.  Like I said... there wasn't that "New 52" feeling to it, title notwithstanding... it could have easily taken place in ANY DC Universe... hell, the "Brother-Eyed" Superman is cut off at the waist... for all I know, he could've been wearing the red trunks before he got assimilated... right?  I guess he's still got that horrendous collar though... ehh...

The art here is almost scarily consistent... I actually had to take a second look at the list of creators at the end... I thought there might have been two pencillers... but didn't expect for this to have been a jam-issue at all.  

We get ourselves a great opening mystery... in both the sorta-far flung and the near futures... with ramifications promising to change the outcome of one to affect the other... all told, not too shabby.  Perhaps a bit too dismembery for my tastes... but, whattayagonna do.  For a Free Comic Book Day issue, this was a great one.  Sure beats the hell out of the outdated reprints we're accustomed to from DC...

Of course, hindsight... that horrible thing... tells us how all of this works out... but, let's not worry about that for now.  I was hoping to be able to direct folks to grab the digital version of this issue... and I was sure DC would have it available seeing as though it was a FCBD book... but, damned if I can find it on readdcentertainment.com!  Not sure I can recommend actually paying for this issue... though the Futures End series, ending and (lack of?) fallout notwithstanding is some pretty decent comics.

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