Titans East Special #1 (January, 2008)
"The Fickle Hand, Part One: Go East, Young Man."
Writer - Judd Winick
Pencils - Ian Churchill
Inks - Norm Rapmund, Andy Lanning & Jon Sibal
Colors - Edgar Delgado
Letters - Comicraft
Assistant Editor - Adam Schlagman
Editor - Eddie Berganza
Cover Price: $3.99
The late 2000's. It was the best of times... oh, who am I even trying to kid... it was the worst of times (to be a Titans fan).
Anyone who might be following my reviews of the contemporary (post-Rebirth) Teen Titans (vol.6) over at Weird Science DC Comics knows that up until a few months ago, I was very hard on the direction (or lack thereof) of the book. It was the same thing every month, high on angst with the looming threat that somebody was going to quit the team at any time. Rarely an issue would go by without someone quitting, threatening to quit, get kicked off, or threatened to be kicked off. It was an awful run.
But then... if you're a tenured Titans fan... your mind might take you back to the post-Geoff Johns/pre-J.T. Krul era... and I realize, "Hey! It could always be worse!".
--
We open back in the long ago during a Jenni! concert that has been hijacked by... the Joker! (I did check around to see if Jenni! was a reference to some obscure Golden/Silver-Age character, but she doesn't appear to be). In fact, it's not only the Joker... but Bizarro too! Man, I love me a Joker/Bizarro team-up... what a classic, right? Right??? Okay, in fairness, I'm sure they'd probably rubbed shoulders a time or two before this... I mean, World's Finest Comics was a thing for a very long time. Anyhoo, the Teen Titans are there to (try and) save the day! This looks like it would've taken place early in the New Teen Titans era, as Wally is a) still a member, and b) still Kid Flash.
Over the next several pages, the Titans look for an opening to attack the Joker (who is revealed to be handcuffed to the lovely and talented Jenni!), all the while Bizarro plays the heavy. Beast Boy transforms into a bee, and stings Joker on the cheek, which provides Robin the opportunity to use a 'rang to shatter the cuffs. Beast Boy then turns into an ape and rescues the girl.
Wally rushes the Joker and swipes his gun... only to find out that it's actually a ticking bomb inside a gun's housing! He runs it out into the bay where it explodes... 3 seconds early. The kinda thing that would add real drama in any story that isn't clearly a flashback!
As the Joker gloats over "killing" Kid Flash, he is suddenly overcome by emotion... yup, Raven's in the house. While gettin' high on the Joker's supply, she goes a little nutty herself (but thankfully doesn't give us like a half-dozen pages of her acting like the Joker).
Back with Bizarro, Starfire realizes that since Superman is powered by yellow sunlight, Bizarro might actually be de-powered by the same. Lucky for her, she appears to be right!
Just then, Wally returns (from dead) with a box under his arm. While he was gone, he swung by... I dunno, S.T.A.R. Labs or something, and picked up a chunk of Blue Kryptonite (which is actually steeped in Bizarro history)! This puts Bizarro down for good... for now.
Robin socks the Joker, and the Titans stand together atop the heap of baddies.
Then... we jump ahead to "now". Cyborg is trying to assemble a second team of Titans. This is post-Infinite Crisis, so the San Francisco-based (Cassie-Wonder Girl-led) iteration ain't doin' all that hot at the moment. Vic asks his usual running-buddies, but they just ain't feelin' it. Donna is off doing some Countdown-related stuff with Kyle Rayner, Beast Boy is hanging out with the All-New All-Old Doom Patrol, Roy is part of the Justice League of America... hell, even Lilith turns him down, and I'm sure she ain't doin' anything!
Finally, Vic reaches out to Dick Grayson... who also ain't feelin' it. Ya see, Cyborg has drafted some "newbies" and he wants the vets on board to help whip 'em into shape (yes, again). Nightwing says they were a great team once, and they may be a great team again... but now might not be the right time. They get nostalgic for a moment, before Dick asks Vic about these "newbies"...
And so, let's meet a few. First stop, Dawn and Holly Granger, the all-new Hawk & Dove! It seemed like they really wanted to play-up Holly (Hawk)'s sex appeal, and so naturally, we catch her in the shower. She tells Dawn about "some guy" she picked up the night before. More on that in a bit...
... or, right now. Next, we meet... Power Boy (complete with booby-window!). He talks about how last night he "got some" with a freaky girl who didn't mind wearing a Supergirl costume while they "did it"!
He goes for a swim before heading over to the first meeting of Teen Titans East. His teammates include, Little Barda, Anima (a Bloodlines buddy), (semi-obscure Charlton character) Son of Vulcan, Lagoon Boy, and, of course... Hawk & Dove.
Cyborg informs them that for this first training session, Power Boy is going to be something of a tackling dummy. The rest of the team are to track him down, and defeat him in combat... which is the case for the next dozen or so pages! During those pages, he exchanges banter with each teammate, and even learns that the freaky girl he was with the night before is now a member of his team! Each member of Titans East gets to sorta-kinda "show their stuff" during the brouhaha... which, sadly, isn't saying much.
The team eventually loses sight of Power Boy, and heads into the nearby woods to investigate... and what they find is, rather grim. A badly-burned Power Boy has been impaled on a tree branch!
Vic rushes in to see what's up, and suddenly beams of energy start raining down on the heroes... one of which goes right through poor Anima!
When Cyborg makes it to the clearing... the beams get a bit bigger... and by "a bit" I mean, a whole lot. A tremendous beam bears down, smashing into the team, and leaving a crater in its wake. To be continued...
--
Okay, before we begin. I gotta say that being a decade-plus removed from this one, I didn't hate it as much as I did when I first read it. I didn't like it... but, I'm not as mad at it as I was back in the Winter of 2007. If you weren't reading the Titans back in the "nebulous interim" that was post-Infinite Crisis/pre-Final Crisis, you wouldn't know just how many team members were "sacrificed". This was the era of the Teen Titans "casket cover"... lotsa teen-age heroes were being thrown on the fire... and the fatigue was real!
Look at this cover... "Who Will Die?" That's your selling point? What is this, Heroes in Crisis?! I'm sorry, you're going to need more than that. Buying a book only to find out who dies? Really, if that's all you're interested in... just hang out on social media a week before the book comes out, some "pro" reviewer will undoubtedly spoil it. If that's all you're looking for... there's no reason to shell out four-bucks for this.
Let's put this book aside for a moment... and say, you missed out on it. Didn't even know it was a "thing". One day you head into the local comic shop, and see a bright-shiny Titans (vol.2) #1 sitting there on the shelf. You pick it up and take it home. Upon opening it, you're greeted with "The Fickle Hand, Part TWO". Part Two... in a #1 issue! What a mess.
Now, let's look at the issue itself. It's kinda empty. It's basically two big fight scenes separated by a couple of pages of exposition. Not sure why we needed the "This was Then..." bits, other than the desire to shoehorn the Joker into the issue. That's fair enough... not sure why it necessitated so many damned pages though.
Speaking of an embarrassment of pages... that training exercise probably didn't need twelve of 'em! I get that we want to try and flesh these newbies out... let 'em "show their stuff" before the big "gotcha". But, that only works if you don't spoil the fact that someone's going to die on the cover! We never get the opportunity to lose ourselves in the story... we're just looking for someone to die. We're anticipating the "gotcha" moment, so that when it finally happens... it doesn't really have the desired effect!
The expositional middle... was okay. It feels like the Titans are always in "rebuilding mode"... nobody can just tell a story about them coming together... there has to be some cockamamie reason behind it all. The past several times has been about "training the next bunch"... which... I mean, there's already a Teen Titans team... and before that, there was Young Justice. This is redundant... and I totally understand the "originals" wanting to be as far away from it as possible. This whole thing feels like a "here we go again" rather than... "Hell yeah, new Titans!"... which isn't the best way to launch a new series.
I suppose we could go into Power Boy and Hawk's cosplay sex... but, I mean, what can I say? It's pandering, crass, and ultimately unnecessary, but it's pretty much exactly what I'd expect from DC and Judd Winick at that point in time. Was this to give us a feeling of "loss"? It wasn't depicted as romantic in the slightest... and it's not like nu-Hawk has all that much time left among the living either. I dunno... the whole thing was just really off-putting.
Overall... I really don't know what to say. Back in 2007-2008 I'd give this a hard-pass, and suggest everyone else would too. Now? I still don't need this in my life, but that doesn't mean other folks won't dig it. The era of Titans-death-fatigue is in the distant rear-view at this point... and so, this might actually feel novel rather than just another few bodies being haphazardly thrown on the fire. It is worth noting, the art here is good. I had some problems with early Ian Churchill... he was very much in the Rob Liefeld-alikes list. You can still see some of the influence here, but it's softened quite a bit. This issue is available digitally if you're interested... but I would suggest holding off until you find it in the cheap-o bins instead.
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Action Comics #975 (May, 2017)
"Superman Reborn, Part Two"
"The Man in the Purple Hat"
Writers - Dan Jurgens & Paul Dini
Pencils - Doug Mahnke & Ian Churchill
Inks - Jaime Mendoza
Colors - Wil Quintana & Mike Atiyeh
Letters - Rob Leigh
Associate Editor - Paul Kaminski
Editor - Mike Cotton
Group Editor - Eddie Berganza
Special Thanks - Peter J. Tomasi & Patrick Gleason
Cover Price: $3.99
Alrighty, it's Part Two... otherwise known as that issue where we find out who the fake Clark Kent has been! A plot point, which was unfortunately spoiled by a litany of comic reviewers on Twitter (and I'd assume other social networks) the day before the issue hit the stands.
Ya know, I get annoyed when Marvel and DC spoil their stuff... but I've come to almost expect it, because they're absolutely starving for any "mainstream" attention they can get. It lets them feel like they're famous for a few minutes if USA Today decides to darken their doors and yawn their way through an interview.
But the fans/reviewers? I expect better of us. We should be above spoiling things... especially things that have been built to for a number of months.
The thing about this issue is that there was an embargo on the comps... they weren't released until Tuesday (we usually get them the Friday before they ship)... this was done to limit spoilers as best as possible.
But, it didn't stop a whole lotta "professional" reviewers from tweeting out four-panels of Mr. Mxyzptlk with a an adorable "Just Because, tee-hee..." as the message before the book hit the shelves. Not technically spoiling anything, but I mean, c'mon... if you open up a social media site a day before a big reveal... and a bunch of people you follow are coyly poking each other's ribs about Mxy... that's going to spoil the surprise. I know it did for me!
So, hey... professional reviewers, quit being jerks. I'll letcha keep rating everything a 10/10, but please don't go out of your way to spoil-not-spoil the books. I get that it's cool to have "privileged information", but c'mon, you've also got a responsibility.
--
We open with Lois and Superman, having just lost their son, heading to the Metropolis apartment of the fake Clark Kent. After some expositional catch-up, they arrive to find that nobodies home. The do some digging and, for whatever reason, check the fridge. Inside they find a whole bunch of sweet goodies... certainly not the fridge of a grown man (unless that grown man is me). Just then... fake-Clark shows up!
Superman asks where Jon is... to which, Clark plays off as not knowing what he's talking about. Clark drops the pretense pretty quickly, and the conversation becomes more intense... he asks Superman if he likes Jon more than him... he asks why he was "left behind".
They have a little test of strength... and Superman is shocked by just how strong this phony Kent is. In a pretty clunky bit of dialogue, he refers to Clark as an "enemy"... which facilitates the faker referring to himself as a "friend"...
... but a friend, who likes to play games! He shape-shifts into... Lex Luthor!
But, that's just for starters. He then shifts into the forms of Bizarro... then Brainiac. Worth noting, the background is candy... like literally, candy canes and all sorts of sweets.
Next, he's Mongul... then Parasite! As Superman is staring down the latter, Lois becomes distracted by a nearby snow globe.
As Lois gazes into the globe, the phony shape-shifts a couple more times... first to Cyborg Superman, Hank Henshaw... then into Doomsday! Inside the globe are some familiar-looking impish characters... which sorta tips the whole thing off.
Bada-bing, bada-boom... it's Mxy! Which... would've been a better reveal had it not been spoiled on social media!
Mxy reveals his plan. Since Superman had forgotten about him... he's going to make Superman (and the entire world) forget about Jon Kent! It'll be as though the boy never existed at all... which is a damn fine indictment on just how scarily powerful Mr. Mxyzptlk can be. Also, how useful he can be when we're trying to cherry-pick continuity!
Mxy blinks away, leaving Lois and Clark standing alone in Clark's old apartment. Superman tells Lois they've gotta find Jon... to which, Lois asks "Jon who?"...
What a strong cliffhanger... well, it would be... but we're not done yet. This is a milestone issue (#975) and so, we gotta cram s'more graham into it. So hey, were you wondering about how Mxy got tied up in this mess? No? Well, we're going to find out anyway! It begins with Jon telling Mxy how his father would tell him stories of Mxyzptlk, only referring to him as "The Man with the Purple Hat", Ruppletat.
Mxy thinks the story is adorable... but has one of his own to tell. Ya see, one time when he returned to "play with" his pal Superman, he found himself caught up in a transdimensional somethin' or another... and right into the grasp of the enigmatic Mr. Oz! After a little back and forth, Oz is able to secure him in his Negative Space Prison.
Mxy doesn't mind so much... he knows his friends will come looking for him when he doesn't show back up soon. Oz tells him that time works a little differently where they are, and it'll be as though two-thousands years have passed before anyone even realizes he's missing.
Mxy's undeterred. He's sure his pal Superman will find him quicker than that... only, he doesn't! The imp takes this as a sign that the Man of Steel doesn't actually care about him.
He tells Jon about how closely associated he's always been with Superman... even on different Earths where he's just in Superman comics and cartoon shows. This is an especially neat little bit.
Anyhoo, Mxyzptlk was finally able to escape from Oz's prison (which we saw at the open of the previous chapter), and what's more... he found Superman! How would he be able to get back into his life though? Well, that's why he chose to come back as Clark Kent. This would certainly get Superman's attention... and also, help put the secret identity genie back in the bottle.
It was only after visiting the "Smith" farm, that everything came back to him... he understood the changes made to reality, including the fact that he'd been written out of it! Only now... he's back!
Back to, wherever he and Jon are, Jon suggests that maybe Superman didn't come looking for Mxy because he assumed he'd "grown up". This gives the imp a nice belly laugh, and he decides to offer the boy a sporting chance to return home. If Jon can say the one magic word... he'll be free to go.
Jon goes to say Kltpzyxm... but stops himself. Instead, he says Tatelppur (Ruppletat backwards, natch). Turns out, that was the ticket! An imp of his word, Mxy sets Jon's free to return to reality.
Well... not really. Ya see, Jon was allowed to go home... just not stay there. Wonk wonk wonkkkk.
--
So yeah... here's the reveal! The fake Clark Kent has been Mr. Mxyzptlk... you heard it here last!
And while that's pretty cool... the first half of the issue leaves me a little bit cold. I'm not sure if it's just my peanut brain expecting more of a story when there are so many pages remaining... but, the "stop" felt rather sudden. It was just... the big reveal... then, rather than digesting the information, we shift into an overlong back-up story.
Let's talk about the choice of Mxy. I know I was a bit deflated when I first read this (or, rather, had it spoiled online). I was hopeful that perhaps the Super-team was going to use someone a bit more obscure. Really, the sky was the limit here... and theories were poppin'... I think I was hopeful that fake-Clark was going to be Superboy-Prime. I mean, who betta to "fix" reality, right?
However, in retrospect, Mxy was as fine a choice as any. Maybe that just means that I was so much more disappointed by the Mr. Oz reveal that I've softened on this one. Who knows?
I mentioned above that Mxy removing Jon from memory is a real sign of just how insanely powerful the imp can be. In "fixing" the secret identity snafu... I mean, it puts things back where they "belong", but... I dunno... I feel like that's a genie you can't truly ever put back in the bottle.
I mean, sure, we can make it so nobody knows... but, part of the fun/magic of the secret identity is the anxiety we readers potentially have when it's put in jeopardy. Now, however, we already know what will happen... ya know? Sure, it's just the New-52! Superman... but, still. It takes a bit of the urgency away from subsequent situations.
The backup managed to fill in some blanks, and let us know where Jon is hanging out... but, I feel like it overstayed its welcome. I mean, we really didn't need 3-4 pages of Mxy being locked up in Oz's prison. Those pages would have been better spent fleshing out the "feature" story... even if it was just 3-4 different indulgent full-page shape-shifts!
Overall... just like I said yesterday... the "feature" took (maybe) five minutes to read... but, it was an enjoyable five minutes. I do recommend checking this out, however, don't exert the effort of seeking out the singles... just grab the trade.
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Et-Cetera:
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Action Comics #836 (April, 2006)
"Superman This is your Life, Part Two"
Writer - Joe Kelly
Pencillers - Dan Jurgen, Dick Giordano, Ed Benes, Ian Churchill, Phil Jimenez, Tom Derenick, Renato Guedes, Lee Bermejo & Doug Mahnke
Inkers - Kevin Conrad, Jose Marzan, Norm Rapmund, Andy Lanning & Drew Geraci
Colorists - Guy Major, Dave Stewart Renato Guedes
Letterer - Nick J. Napolitano
Assistant Editor - Jeanine Schaefer
Editor - Eddie Berganza
Cover Price: $2.50
Sometimes we can get a little too "close" to our comics. For the longest time, this was a Superman story I couldn't bring myself to reread.
I mean, as comics readers (or fans of any consumable entertainment/media), I think we've all experienced that feeling where we have an idea where a story is headed... and knowing that we're powerless to stop it. That's how I felt reading this back in 2005-2006.
I remember the first time I heard (in comics) that a Crisis was on its way. It was an issue of Teen Titans by Geoff Johns... and from that point on, my DC-reading fell into sort of a fog. I wasn't around for the first Crisis... so this was really my first time not feeling "safe" as a DC Comics fan.
Of course, these days that almost seems quaint. DC is getting just as bad as Marvel when it comes to reboots/relaunches/re-whatevers... and the industry has become so knee-jerk reactionary that I can't even remember the last time I felt "safe".
Anyhoo... this issue (and the story it's a part of) comes from a very... shaky time in my (and likely some others') DC fandom. Things were weird... and nebulous at best.
Let's give it a look and see if time has soothed this fan's soul.
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We open with three... kinda different tellings of Superman's origin story... it's a tale of three Kryptons... three families of El... three rockets, and three sets of Kents. Yeah, there's definitely something weird going on here. It's almost as though we're in the midst of experiencing a... Crisis of sorts. Hmm...
We jump ahead to the events(ish) of Man of Steel #1, where Lois and company are about to crash the "space plane". They find themselves saved by a strange flying man, who upon setting them down gives Lois a peck on the cheek and introduces himself to her as "Superman". Well, that's not right... right?
We briefly pop into the present, and find Superman in the heat of battle with... somebody. This somebody is commenting on the corruption in the world... and is wondering why Superman hasn't done more.
We hop back to the past... this time, it's the first meeting between Superman and Batman. This is a contentious meeting, so clearly post-Crisis. Batman tells Superman if he steps near him, it will set off a bomb that will kill an innocent. Superman calls his bluff, because he knows the bomb is on Batman's person. They agree to team up.
We briefly check in with the Earth-2 Superman, who is holding vigil over the ailing Earth-2 Lois Lane.
Back to the past! We relive an... altered version of Lex Luthor's Kryptonite Ring saga. It starts similarly enough, Lex taunts Superman with the one thing that appears to hurt him. He (Lex) then contracts cancer due to the Kryptonite exposure. Then, on his death-bed, Superman makes Lex an offer he can't refuse... he'll use Kryptonian technology in order to grant Lex a quarter-century of life. Lex accepts.
Then... a couple of versions of Lois Lane learning "the secret". They both end the same way.
Then... Doomsday! It's a greatest hits (pun!) from Superman (vol.2) #75... right up until the ending. Ya see, the titans both land their "finishing blow"... only, this time around Doomsday's punch isn't enough to keep the Man of Steel down.
We jump ahead... though, still in flashback... to the events of Identity Crisis. The satellite-era League is arguing about what they ought to do about Doctor Light. Just as in the original story, half of the team seems a-okay with the mindwipe... and the other half ain't exactly on board. Superman arrives to offer a third alternative. Well, he doesn't so much offer it as "invoke" it. He zaps Doctor Light... and banishes him to the Phantom Zone!
This, somehow, is viewed as the worst option by the League. Mindwiping is totally cool... but Phantom Zoning is "crossing the line". It's not that I disagree, but, c'mon... the League was acting a bit shady in the original Identity Crisis story. It's not like they have all that much room to talk. Anyhoo, the League holds an intervention with the Man of Steel... it seems as though the "Phantom Zone banishment" has become something of a go-to for him. Superman decides to disband the JLA... to which, Zatanna attempts to put Superman "to sleep"... but cannot seem to muster the words.
Then we meet Superman's new running buddies: The Elite. Well, the Justice League Elite.
We wrap up back in Metropolis where Jimmy Olsen and friends are having drinks and trying to ride out the apocalypse. Jimmy tells his pals that Superman has the situation under control... and there's nothing to worry about. Then... something happens.
--
Such an... uncomfortable read.
This entire issue just feels "off", which I suppose is the point. It's like the "fun-house mirror" version of the post-Crisis Superman story. Added the "jam" of artists here... I'm not entirely sure what to make of it.
I get that this is just running alongside the actual Infinite Crisis event book... so things are being left purposely nebulous, but today... just as over a dozen years ago... I really can't talk myself into liking this. Perhaps it is the years of hindsight we now have... or maybe I just never let go of my reboot-bitterness. We've definitely hit, at least in my opinion, the point where these sort of things have diminishing returns.
I think back to the early days of the "Berganza era" and the influx of, what many post-Crisis fans referred to as "S.A.S." (that's Silver Age Sh-tuff)... and how that didn't really bug me. I felt like that was adding something, where I feel like this is only taking away.
Overall... this is a difficult one for me to recommend. I will say, if you do decide to give this a whirl, read the entire three-part story... and not just the middle chapter like we're doing here. It's available digitally, and has been collected in the Superman: Infinite Crisis trade paperback.
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