Titans $ell-Out! Special #1 (1992)

Titans $ell-Out! Special #1 (November, 1992)
"The Titans $ellout $pecial or, The Bucks Stop Here!"
Writer - Marv Wolfman
Pencillers - Tom Grummett, Steve Erwin, Adam Hughes, John Statema, & John Costanza
Inkers - Adam Hughes, Al Vey, Kevin Branch, Dave Hunt, & Charles Barnett
Letterers - L. Lois Buhalis & Bob Pinaha
Colorist - Adrienne Roy
Assistant Editor - Frank Pittarese
Editors - Jonathan Peterson & Rob Sampson
Thanks - Gordon Kent
Cover Price: $3.50

Tired of the Titans yet?  Me neither... though, ask me again in about five minutes, and I might give you a different answer.

Today... we sell-out!  What an awful thing to "sell-out", am I right?

By the by, if anyone wants to contact me about any sort of selling-out opportunities, you'll find all of my contact info on the right.

Ahem.

--

We pick up hot off the heels of our Totally Chaotic conclusion.  The amalgamated Titans have returned home from the Home of the Gods.  Upon arrival on Titans Island, they notice that Lord Chaos' pyramid has been destroyed.  One of the Teamers posits that Battalion is likely responsible for the mess.  Battalion, by the way, ain't here... even though he was at that God World with them all.  Phantasm does some spooky monologuing (is that a word?) before vanishing through a portal.  As the Titans get their bearings... they see they already have a visitor.

Well, of course it's New York City Mayoral Hopeful, Elizabeth Alderman.  I swear, she's starting to feel like a thorn in my side, much less the Titans.  She's flanked by reporters and cameramen, and it's made clear that she's running on a platform of, get this, banning the Titans from New York City.  That's it!  Taxation... transportation... who cares about any'a that stuff?!  Pantha gives her a... uh, warm welcome.

Alderman, who is currently a City Councilwoman... so, she might have some stroke, hands over to Nightwing a court order banning the Titans from using their powers within the city.  Dick is dumbfounded (gobsmacked, I tell you!) but can hardly be too surprised, considering the smoldering island they're currently standing on (which is smoldering for the second time in about as many months).  Also, Alderman's been after them for quite some time now... so, it's not like this was going to go completely unnoticed.

Just then, rhe Feds arrive on the scene, and suggest Alderman slow her roll.  Deep among the wreckage, Beast Boy finds... Deathstroke... and he's dead!  So, Deadstroke, then.

Despite some Titanic debate, the Feds bag Slade and load him into a chopper.  The Titans aren't exactly pleased.  Then, the rest of the team(s) show up, already defying Alderman's court order by actually flying in.  Oh, and Donna's hair is short again.  It wasn't three pages ago, but it is here.  Guess adding that third editor worked like gangbusters!  Anyhoo... the Titans hop on their T-Raft, and head over to Manhattan proper, where they are met with a fair amount of heckling.  No cursing though, so DC's New York is definitely different than the one I grew up in.

Steve Dayton is waiting for them... and he sweeps the team off to yet another of his fabulous estates.  I mean, is this wise?  In the past few days, the Titans have destroyed both his penthouse, and that other estate.  Oh well, the Titans are happy so long as this crib's got a pool.  While funnin' and sunnin' Dick considers their options... maybe they don't have to stay in New York anymore.  Steve Dayton perks up... he's got just the place.

Hollywood.

The next few pages are set up to look like a photo album or a scrapbook.  There's some cute stuff here... but, I'm not so sure about any of it.

We shift scenes to see the Titans doing some more sunnin' and funnin'... this time on a beach.  Dayton chats Dick up about repairing the image of the Titans... and suggests marketing!  Ya see... the title of this book is coming back to roost.  Since Dayton owns... like, one of everything... he's sure to have a toy manufacturer and a public relations firm in there somewhere.  Dick stops reading his book-with-no-words-in-it, and thinks on it.

But, let's not stop with toys... am I right?  We can do cartoons... movies... all sorts'a stuff!  They even talk casting (Tom Cruise for Nightwing, Julia Roberts for Starfire).  Baby Wildebeest is pretty bored by all of this (and I can't say that I blame him, so he leaves to build a sand castle).

Of course, the sand castle is insane.  Titans $ell-Out! is filmed before a live-studio audience.

Next thing we know, the Titans are preparing to sell their souls... and are watching Hollywood-types volley ideas for their licensed feature film.  Dayton puts the financials at "one hundred million" by the way.  One of the agents pitches a story... and, not kidding... I swear they're pitching the plot to Youngblood #1.

The discussion shift to perhaps making the Titans film into a "toon" (just try and get them to say cartoon... they won't do it!).  They list the benefits of doing it this way... which is mostly a kinda hamfisted attempt and making commentary about how awful things in media are.  Not saying anything they say is wrong... but, it's like... dude, we get it.

Then... er, wait a sec.  Mr. Cameraman?  Can we get an "enhance" here.

Okay, one more time.

J-just... what in all hells is going on here?  Is that man... pulling his eyeball out of its socket?!  Is that what we've come to?!  Just what is it he doesn't want to see???  Should we be seeing it?!  What. Does. He. Know?  Well, okay okay, maybe the art's just unclear... but tell me that doesn't look like it!  Anyhoo... the Titans dig what they hear, and sign on the dotted line.  They are officially licensed.

And we immediately jump into... the pilot of Teeny Titans.  The episode is called "Teeny Roast!"... and folks, this isn't good.  I mean, there's a certain novelty to it... and if it only lasted a page or two, I'd be on board.  This is thirteen-pages long... it overstays its welcome by at least ten.

Suppose we oughta press on.  The Teeny Titans are Nighty-Night (Nightwing), Daddy's Little Princess (Starfire), Presto-Chango (Beast Boy), Beesty (Baby Wildebeest), and Kitty Litt'r (Pantha)... and it only gets worse from here.  They fight a bit in their "play room", until their gun-wielding "teacher" Mr. Wilson pops his head in to tell'em to "Shaddup".  I'm not sure if this is supposed to be a riff on Muppet Babies... not that it would make this any more enjoyable.

After this, Daddy's Little Princess realizes that her Beesty is missing, and fears it's been snatched.  And so, she searches all ova da place for her lost doll.  I think it's a doll.  I mean, we'll learn soon enough, but I think we're supposed to think it's a doll for now.

Don't worry DLP, Nighty Night's on the case.  He pulls out a magnifying glass, and literally circles the planet looking for the Beesty.  Along the way, they pass before an electronics store with a television in its window.  On said television is a commercial for the Toymanator... who is, ya know, Deathstroke.  He holds aloft a broken toy... with hair that looks like a bowl of buttered popcorn.

The Teeny Titans rush off to the television studio in order to confront the Toymanator... but find the place is completely booby-trapped.  After falling into one trap, Pantha... uh, kills and cooks a cow with her bare hands.  Why there was a cow at a TV station, I'll never know.

They give chase to the Toymanator... across several different show sets, including phony versions of Star Trek, Cheers, and Oprah.  Daddy's Little Princess finally spies her Beesty amid a pile of toys... and the Teeny ones learn the true identity of the Toymanator.  Why, it's their own Preschool Teacher, Mr. Wilson!

They fight some more before Beesty grows into his final form... and proceeds to maim poor ol' Mister Wilson.  Also, Wilson is a toy himself... got batteries in his back and everything.  A Nighty Night Nightyrang sees to those.

And... bah-bleep, bah-bleep, bah-bleep... that's finally over, folks!

Back in the "real world", the Titans are none too pleased about the "toon" they were just subjected to.  Trust me Titans, I'm with ya on that one!  Despite having already signed all of the necessary contracts, the Titans do not want this "toon" to air.  Again, can't blame 'em.  They threaten the (shirtless) Hollywood agent... and he seems to come around.  And so, the Titans head home.

As the Titans jet off, however... Hollywood falls in love with the Teeny Titans property... and decides to spin them off (despite never having actually aired) into their own programs... hoping by the Fall to be the, get this, "All-Teeny Titan Channel".  Yee-ikes.

--

Well...

What's there to say?  This just wasn't very good, was it?  There were a few cute ideas... just, stretched over faaaaaaar too many pages.

Let's start with the Teeny Titans.  This "animated" style really did the issue no favors.  It was like "animated without the charm".  Instead of looking like Looney Tunes characters, which I'm assuming was the gimmick, they instead come across like... I dunno, dollar store Garbage Pail Kids.  Just very little charm here... and any charm they might've had, wore off within the first few panels.  Unfortunately, this was a thirteen page "bit".

A few cute ideas, yes... Deathstroke firing "seventy-billion bullets" made me chuckle... and also, crushing the Jericho doll was neat... but, for the most part, lame-city.

Let's talk about the ridiculous notion that the Titans would license their likenesses at all.  Here we've got a team... led by Nightwing, ward of Batman.  Like he's really going to sell his likeness and risk anybody out there putting two-and-two together?  And, I mean... Steve Dayton's a smart dude... is this something he'd ever really recommend?

Hell, dude's the... what, fourth richest man in the DC Universe... if he's so concerned about the Titans financial situation... he could probably lend a hand, right?  Or, just hire a P.R. firm without all of the movie nonsense.  If "current year" media has learned us anything, you don't have to have a movie out in order to engage in some optics-improving "spin".

The art here... well, it's sort of a "jam book", and it's pretty uneven throughout.  It's to be expected, I guess.  What I'm concerned about, and this is going to sound silly... the continuity here is a bit of a mess.  I mean, with every additional editor we pull on board, they seem to get more and more wrong (Hi, 2018 Marvel!).  Silly things like, Donna's hair length drastically changing between pages.  I mean, nobody caught that?  Battalion, despite being with the Titans a few seconds ago, nowhere to be found?  And, where were the Teamers during the licensing spoo?  Just hanging out on the beach the whole time?  Characters just seemed to walk in and out of the panels, nilly willy... as though this was a sitcom.

Waitasec... you don't think?  Nah... this couldn't be a commentary on things like sitcoms, could it?  I mean... a few of the hallmarks are there.  Characters have become caricatures... it's like we've hit the sixth season of Full House or something... Danny's a neat-freak first and foremost, Jesse's futzin' with his hair, and Joey's got a beaver woodchuck (thanks Google!) puppet sitting on his lap at all times.  These Titans have devolved into their base traits... which is especially bothersome coming off of the (relatively) strong ending of Total Chaos.  Also, I swear I heard a laugh track when Baby Wildebeest built that wacky sandcastle.  I assume you all heard that too.

Or... or... does this book feel so soulless because... like on a meta-level, the Titans have sold their souls to Hollywood?  I mean, this book (and team) definitely feels as though it's soul has been forcibly ripped from it... maybe that's the game?

Wow, those paragraphs sure got away from me.  Chalk it up to me embracing my inner caricature.  I'm in one of my "later seasons", might as well just let myself go!

Anyhoo... despite some cute moments, I really didn't dig this.  I don't see Dick and the gang just leaving a newly-depowered Donna on the other side of the country without a thought.  I'm not sure if Marv and Company thought the Titans needed a "cool down" period... but, even looking at it that way, this book fails.  It straddles the line of real and wacky... and, in my opinion, fails to stick the landing on both sides.

Not really one I could recommend... unless, of course, you're dying to see that Teeny Titans bit in its entirety.  Otherwise... hard miss.  Which, uh, doesn't necessarily mean we won't follow up on this one sometime soon.

--

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907

Deathstroke the Terminator #1 (1991)

Deathstroke the Terminator #1 (August, 1991)
"Full Cycle, Chapter One: Assault!"
Writer - Marv Wolfman
Penciller - Steve Erwin
Inker - Will Blyberg
Letterer - John Costanza
Colorist - Tom McCraw
Editor - Jonathan Peterson
Cover Price: $1.75

Gonna be talking Deathstroke today... which is pretty cool, because I'd never read this issue before!  This was always one'a them "wall books" growing up... however, didn't quite share the same "quarter bin" fate as other "wall books" of its era.

Sure, we can find stacks of Youngblood, Reign of the Supermen, and Knightfall books that were once pinned to the walls of our comic shops in the cheap-o bins... but, Deathstroke the Terminator?  Not so much.  Least not in my neck of the woods.

Which is exactly why I immediately jumped when I happened across this one in the dollar bin not too long ago!  So, without further ado, let's get right into it!

--

We open outside Stuttgart, Germany where a teeny-tiny helicopter fast approaches a moving train.  Well, actually several helicopters make the approach, but the larger choppers are actually trying to stop the teeny-tiny one.  There is a "Lady A" on board the train, who we quickly learn is Adeline Kane, Slade Wilson's ex-wife and the mother to Jericho and Ravager.  The teeny-tiny chopper man boards the train... shoots Addie in the gut, then tosses her from the moving train!

A job well done, he hops off the train just before it derails... and, naturally, explodes!  Now, lemme tell ya... that's how you open a comic book!  That's how you open a volume!

We shift scenes to join the man of the hour, Slade Wilson... just as he's hunting down a Bull Elephant.  He turns the pursuit into a sort of dance, before popping the beast right 'tween the eyes.  At first I was like "hmm...", then we learn that the beast "deserved" it.  I guess your mileage may vary on that... turns out the elephant destroyed a local village.  I dunno, elephant's gonna elephant, right?

Back at the Deathstroke Chalet, Slade takes a shower... and Wintergreen fields a phone call.  It's the news of the attack on Adeline... she's alive, but in critical condition.

Outside, Slade and Wintergreen are attacked by that same fella in the teeny-tiny helicopter.  The baddie makes it clear that he's the one who shot Addie... he then goes on to 'splode the Chalet... and the Strokemobile.

Slade and Wintergreen walk the thirty-plus miles to the nearest airfield and catch a flight to Stuttgart.  Their "inside man" Lockhart brings them to Addie's side... and it's made pretty obvious that there are still some feelings lingering inside ol' Mr. Wilson.

We hop into flashback mode as Slade recalls how he met and fell in love with Adeline.  Of course, we've been there, and done that... but this is mucho helpful for new readers who nabbed this for it's number-one-iness.  Addie wakes up and informs Slade that this teeny-tiny helicopter man knew both of their names... and then passes out again.

Slade realizes that Addie was hired to protect the train's cargo... and so, he and Wintergreen head a few hours north to visit her employer and find out just what was on board.  As he watches Deathstroke climb the side of a castle, Wintergreen flashes back to how Slade Wilson became the man that he is... super-serums, super-sons and what-not.

Inside Castle Waller... we meet, well... a fella named Waller (no relation, I'm sure).  Dude doesn't seem to be in the mood to chat... but Deathstroke manages to persuade him to at least "step aside" while he does some digging.

He discovers some checks sent from a Willem Neustadt with an address in Baden, Germany... and so, that's our men's next stop.  They stake out the address from a cafe across the street.

Finally, a car returns home... it's Mrs. Neustadt, and her armed chauffeur.  Deathstroke does some Deathstroking... and learns that the Neustadt's son had been kidnapped.  Mrs. N. even mistakes Deathstroke for the kidnapper!  Turns out the family made a deal to exchange Plutonium for their son's safe return... and it just so happens, that was the cargo Adeline Kane was protecting!

Oh, and there are armed men watching this chat go down from a closet... they'll probably play a part later on.

We wrap up the issue in Adaam, Qurac... where the Plutonium is being delivered by the teeny-tiny helicopter man... who is finally revealed as being... The Ravager?!

--

Well, well, well... this was one helluva fine comic book.

From the bombastic opening to the last-page reveal... I had a great time finally getting to read this one.  I mean, this has a sorta-familiar tone to other Wolfman works... while at the same time feels completely fresh, new, and different.

Let's talk about that opening.  Amazing job from all involved... it really felt like the opening to an action movie, or the opening cinematic to a video game.  Instantly drew me in, and perfectly set the tone for things moving forward.

Slade the "Game Hunter"?  Well, I'll just leave that alone.  It does fit into his established character-history... however, I can see it rubbing people the wrong way.  It's funny how we (myself included) can not be phased by people killing other people in media... but, when it's an animal... it kinda sticks with us.  I mean, this issue would have been just fine (better?) without this scene... and unfortunately, it's one of the first things I think about upon reflection.  We'll just leave it alone (he says, a hundred words later).

The brief Addie/Slade reunion was pretty cool... and it's confirmed that Adeline is aware of the events of Titans Hunt.  I didn't wanna spoil it in the synopsis... but, Jericho figures quite heavily into it... and hasn't really recovered, even to this very day in 2018!

I love the idea of Slade and Wintergreen globetrotting like a suped-up Holmes and Watson.  Though, maybe I'm just projecting since I feel like Watson and Wintergreen might be the same person.  I think I've already shown y'all that I'm no "Holmesian"... if that's even the word for it, so I could be completely off base here.  Still like their "buddy-globetrotter" shtick.

The reveal at the end... was a good one!  I know I've joked in the past about how Deathstroke has been the "last page reveal" more than any other character in DC history... so, it's fitting in a way that we get a Ravager reveal on the last page of Deathstroke's initial outing.  I'm not sure how this all pans out... but I'm definitely interested enough to track down the rest of the arc!

The flashbacks here were handled well, and didn't really interrupt or intrude upon the ongoing story.  Gotta remember that this was a "New #1" in 1991... there were going to be a ton of folks grabbing this "sight unseen"... which is to say, not have the faintest idea who or what a "Deathstroke the Terminator" is.  Then again, many of those folks probably wouldn't think to open the thing to find out.  Either way, I didn't need the flashbacks... but I'm glad they were there for those who might.

Overall... had a really good time with this, and I think most DC (and comic) fans would too.  This issue (and series) is available digitally... and this arc has been collected in the Deathstroke the Terminator, Volume One: Assassins trade paperback.

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(Not the) Letters Page:

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880

Vigilante #50 (1988)

Vigilante #50 (February, 1988)
"A Life!"
Writer - Paul Kupperberg
Penciller - Steve Erwin
Inker - Jack Torrance
Letterer - John Costanza
Colorist - Liz Berube
Editor - Mike Gold
Cover Price: $1.50

Spoilers are a funny and terrible thing.  I've had my share of comics stories spoiled before getting the chance to actually read them myself.  I've even had major key plot twists ruined for me while waiting on line at the comic book store.  So, uh... spoilers to follow...

One time in particular was back in 2003.  My absolute favorite book at the time was Marvel's New X-Men written by Grant Morrison.  I'll never forget standing in line to pay for my unhealthily large stack of books... only to have the jerk-ass behind the counter look at me and say:

"Can you believe Xorn was Magneto?!?"

My chin hit my chest, and the dude instantly realized what he had done.  He ruined the plot twist that the part two years of X-Men stories was leading up to... and he didn't just ruin it for me, there were other people in the shop as well.

He rang up my books, and I stopped him before he scanned New X-Men #146.  He looked at me funny, and I just shook my head "no".  Rather than argue, he gave it to me for free... I mean, the entire thing was ruined, it was the least he could do.  So yeah... I really don't like spoilers.

I said all of that so that I may say this.  This final issue of Vigilante will be irreparably spoiled for you should you choose to continue.  Granted this is a nearly thirty-year-old book, but I want to make it perfectly clear that I am about to ruin the (fairly shocking) ending in this here post.

Still with us?  Okey dokey... let's do this.

--

Adrian Chase picks up the latest edition of the local newspaper.  The headline states that someone called the Homeless Avenger has been killed.  The Homeless Avenger, like Chase, was a Vigilante.  It is alluded to that Chase left the Avenger to die in something of a riot the night prior.  This is just the beginning of Chase's realization of all the harm he has inflicted on those around him.

In order to perhaps justify his actions to himself, Chase thinks back to why he started on this path.  Why he became the Vigilante.  He was a District Attorney in Manhattan who had a hit put out on him... however, it would be Chase's family that paid the ultimate price.

Enter, Chase's on-again-off-again, Black Thorn.  She's sporting a black eye (courtesy of Chase... see, he's having a pretty rotten time of late).  They discuss the recent events concerning the Homeless Avenger.  Thorn wishes to speak about what happened between them the night before as well, however, Chase ain't having it.  She tries to keep him there, to which Chase smacks her across her face and knocks her down.

A man exits the building.  The police have been staking out the place overnight.  Captain Arthur Hall instructs his men to chase the fella down.  The pursuit continues through several blocks, several buildings, and over several fences.  They finally catch up with who they believe to be Adrian Chase... however, they got the wrong guy.  Probably still a bad guy, given the frantic escape attempt... but not their target.

Adrian Chase decides to take in a wholesome slasher movie to get his mind off of things.  There are some punk kids harassing an elderly fellow a few rows back.  Chase tries to maintain his cool, however, completely flips out and thrashes the little bastards.  As he pounds away, he comes to the terrifying realization that he no longer has any control over his Vigilante instincts.  He flees the theater as security approaches.

Black Thorn meets up with Detective Harry Stein at a diner to discuss what's going on with Adrian.  She fears his mental capacities are failing, and he just may be losing his mind.  Stein, understanding chap that he is tells her to chill out.

Chase, now in his Vigilante gear, raids an opium den... which becomes an incredibly violent and shooty affair.  The nearby police along with Hall receive word of the raid, and head over.

While Vigilante shoots anything that moves, he carries on an internal monologue recounting several others who wore his Vigilante costume and met with a fatal end... one by his own hand.  Before he knows it, Chase has killed dozens of men inside the opium den.  Surrounded by piles of fresh corpses, he thinks to himself how everyone in his presence winds up dead.  He collapses forward, and vomits.

The Police burst through the door, and Chase throws himself out a window.  Outside, after a brief period of rest and further reflection, Chase reenters the fray.  What appears to be a shootout between the police and some thugs was ultimately a trap to lure the Vigilante in.  No sooner does he enter, that all the guns turn to point at him.  What is a Vigilante to do?  He fires back.  Now, Adrian Chase is a cop-killer.

Attempting to flee before he can commit any more atrocities Chase is approached from behind.  He turns and instinctively fires... and realizes that he just shot Captain Hall dead.  They exchange a few, pretty contentious words as Hall lay dying.  As the rest of the officers approach, Chase flees once more.

The next scene... is the big one.  We observe Chase in his apartment.  He's holding a pistol, and he carefully inserts one bullet into the chamber.  He lifts his Vigilante mask and crushes it in his hand as he enters the bathroom.  He considers the significance of what he is about to do, and after a few moments of hesitation proceeds to place the pistol under his chin, and somewhat reluctantly... pulls the trigger.  Black Thorn enters moments later and discovers what had just occurred.

Click to Enlarge

The issue and series ends with the very small funeral service of Adrian Chase.  Adrian was cremated, and Thorn keeps his urn of ashes.

--

Now that was a damn fine way to close out a series.

I'd read this issue a few times before today's review, and each time I still get the butterflies as I work my way through it.  The moment after he shoots Hall... you know that he's taken that one step too far, and there would be no coming back.  In the hours leading up to the event in question, he recounts all of the lives he'd left in his wake in the name of his twisted form of justice.  He was initially put on his path due to the death of his wife and children... not unlike another certain skull-chested vigilante.  However, unlike the Punisher, Chase's motive was more justice than revenge.  I believe he somehow justified his actions, almost making it though they were for the overall good... the Punisher, I feel knows what he's doing is wrong... and he just gets over it.

You get the feeling that the Punisher doesn't really take inventory of his actions.  Never stopping to consider what he was doing.  Adrian Chase, however, continuously beat himself up over what he'd caused to occur.  When that overwhelming guilt... almost tangible... the physical heft of that guilt, was just too much for him to bear... well, he needed both a way out, and a way to pay for his sins.

Suicide is something that should not be taken lightly.  Kupperberg does an amazing job showing Chase actually hesitate.  He's sitting in his bathroom with that pistol... and he... stops.  He sits down.  He thinks.  He realizes the irrevocable nature of what he is about to do.  A lot of credit needs to be given to artist, Steve Erwin as well.  He gives us, in Chase's facial expressions (and even posture and visible mannerisms) such conflicting emotion.  Even to the final panel before killing himself, the detail of his finger trembling is included... up to the very last moment, Chase was struggling with his decision.

A terrible and wonderful issue that I'm sure this piece did very little justice to.  It is something that should be read... even though I've just ruined it.  If you come across this issue, don't hesitate... pick it up.  You can then hesitate with every turn of the page until Adrian Chase ultimately makes peace with and meets his (un)timely end.

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