Wonder Woman #253 (March, 1979)
"Spirit of Silver... Soul of Gold"
Writer - Jack C. Harris
Penciller - Jose Delbo
Inker - Frank Chiaramonte
Letterer - Milt Snapinn
Colorist - Jerry Serpe
Editor - Ross Andru
Cover Price: $0.40
Welcome to day two of our Wonder Weekend... where we're celebrating, ya know Wonder Woman stuff.
--
We open on the Moon with Diana explaining to her mother Hippolyte how her battle with the Empress of the Silver Snake went down. The fight ended with the Empress peering into Diana's soul expecting to find a great evil... instead, realizing she has immense courage, then turning herself to lead! Hippolyte (which I'm sure I'm going to type as Hippolyta at least once) approaches the leaden figure... whose eyes begin to glow red! The Empress attacks calling out Hippolyte as a betrayer!
The Amazons, seeing their Queen being attacked, leap into action. They fire a few blasts from their rayguns... the force of which causes them to fly backwards due to the lack of gravity. Diana can tell from the way the Empress speaks that this is not the first time she's encountered Hippolyte. She wants an explanation, however, that's going to have to wait. The Empress hops on her Silver Snake and flees... and Hippolyte allows it. The Amazons are puzzled.
We rejoin Diana back on Earth where she is heading to work at NASA. She is an astronaut trainee, and she arrives just in the nick of time to participate in the Weightless Chamber. Among her fellow trainees is a man named Mike Bailey who she appears to be a bit standoffish with. We get the impression that he might remind her of somebody she was once close with.
While Diana and company are having a game of Zero-G catch, we revisit the Empress. She reveals that she believes that Diana is somehow occupying her body... and has also turned the Amazons against her. Not sure what any of that means, but the plot is sure thickening!
Back at NASA, Diana and Mike are readying for an exercise in the subterfuge. As Mike goes for a (literal) spin, his capsule breaks free, slamming into Diana... who, thankfully has the power to stop it before it does any real damage. She pulls Mike out of the capsule, and in the heat of the moment, they share a kiss! He refers to her as "Angel", which was also what Steve Trevor once called her. Confused and perhaps ashamed, Diana rushes away.
Later, Wonder Woman and Hippolyte lead the Amazons back into space to face off with the Empress for their final battle. The lady warriors charge, leading to the Empress reacting by blasting the bracelets of the Amazonian "extras". This causes them to go mad... like frothing at the mouth mad!
The Empress grabs Hippolyte with the intentions of relieving her of her magic girdle. Diana attempts to interfere, leading to the baddie hoisting the Queen over her head, at which time she refers to her as... her sister?! Uh oh...
Now we finally get an explanation. The Empress is really the sister of Hippolyte... Diana! She had been killed many years prior in a struggle with Hercules... after which, her ethereal form just sorta floated around... watching. When she returned to Paradise Island, she found a group of Amazons that were unfamiliar to her... they were fortified and armed. As she observed... she continually grew weaker. She headed into space where she came across an asteroid comprised of silver and gold... and so, she decided to craft herself not only a new physical body... but a neat-o Silver Snake spacecraft!
With her new body, the Empress went back to observing. This time around she sees Wonder Woman whuppin' on some fools. The Empress is puzzled... why would an Amazon impose herself on an ordinary man? And, more importantly, how did this Amazon in particular wind up in her body?!
Back in the present, the Empress wonders aloud how Hippolye could hate her so much that she would give away her body. Before she might attack, Wonder Woman catches her in a full nelson. At this point, Hippolyte decides to come clean... Wonder Woman is her daughter... who she crafted in the image of her late sister Diana! Well, that's all new information to me! It's at this point that the Empress fully grasps the fact that she is... dead.
The issue ends with the Empress begrudgingly accepting her fate... and she is greeted to the afterlife by a pair of Amazon spirits, finally about to go to her final rest.
--
Wow, wasn't expecting to find out how Diana got her looks in this issue! How 'bout that? I really wasn't expecting all that much to happen here... just figured it was any ol' pre-Crisis issue... they always seemed so interchangeable to me.
I like the idea that if Diana had to be "created" it was done in the image of someone Hippolyte held dear... perhaps even in tribute of that person. That's a neat little wrinkle that I'd never known... or even considered.
I don't really consider Wonder Woman a "cosmic" character... that is to say, didn't expect to see a space adventure here. I'm usually think about Greek pillars and architecture, not stars and spaceships. I'm not a fella who really digs space stories, but I gotta say, I was a bit relieved when I cracked this open.
The NASA bits were good in that I got the impression that these characters had been part of Diana's cast for at least a little while... and they were written in such a way that I didn't feel lost. I didn't need to know their backstories, as the only one we needed to worry about here was Bailey. Harris did a fine job letting us know all (I feel) we needed to know for this particular chapter.
Overall, a nice issue. We get a big reveal (perhaps a really big reveal) without interrupting ongoing subplots. If I were a betting man, I'd say nothing that happens here still "matters", but I feel it's still well worth giving a look if you come across it. As far as I can tell, this issue has not been made available digitally... and to my knowledge, has yet to be collected. If anyone knows otherwise, please let me know.
Just like I said yesterday, I hope all the folks who headed out to the theater over the past couple days had a Wonder-ful time!
--
Letters Page:
--
Interesting Ads:
Wonder Woman (vol.2) #190 (May, 2003)
"The Game of the Gods, Part 2: Red Eyes in the Morning..."
Writer - Walter Simonson
Penciller - Jerry Ordway
Inker - P. Craig Russell
Letterer - John E. Workman, Jr.
Coloring - Trish Mulvihill
Separations - WildStorm FX
Editor - Ivan Cohen
Cover Price: $2.25
Welcome to Wonder Weekend... where we'll pretend that the weekend consists of Friday and Saturday in celebration of some movie that I'm not going to see* coming out! Let's not get it twisted, I don't have any problem with this film in particular... I just don't see comic book movies... ever. If you're a long time reader/listener, you already know the deal.
Anyhoo, I wasn't quite sure where to start with Wonder Woman... which reminded me that, back around the turn of the century... I felt quite the same way. Wonder Woman was the only member of the JLA who had an ongoing book that I just couldn't get into. It felt like it was too dense, and far too uninviting for a relatively-new DC Comics fanatic... and I don't think there were trades (at least easily-accessible ones) collecting the Perez run at that time.
I kept waiting for an opportunity to jump on... and in early 2003, the news broke that there was a jumping-on point on the horizon! You couldn't miss the news if you were a comics (or pop-culture) fan, because this one was going to start with... Wonder Woman getting a haircut. Sounds silly, yes... but this tweak in Wondy's appearance made the actual (non-comic) news. I saw it in the newspaper... and it got a mention on the television news as well!
I figured, well hell... here's my opportunity to finally get "in" on this character that had eluded/intimidated me for so long. Then I get to the store to pick up the iconic "haircut issue"... and find that it's Part Two of a story-arc. Wonk wonk wonkkkk.
Well, no bother... we're gonna discuss it anyway. In honor of the film, here is the first issue of Wonder Woman I ever bought.
* This doesn't mean I don't want anyone else to see it. I hope everyone who goes... which I'm guessing will be a lot of you... has a Wonder-ful time, and enjoys her long-time-coming silver screen feature!
--
We open with Diana appearing in the middle of Columbus Circle in New York City. Her clothes are torn, she looks freaked out, and... oh yeah, she's carrying a baby... or a figurine that looks like one. She works her way through some very confused New Yorkers and heads toward the park... with designs on stashing the tot. She uses an errant kite-string to tie the tike high in a tree for safe keeping while she... tries to figure out who she is! She's got amnesia, by the way.
As she walks down the crowded street, the eyes of each person she passes begin to glow red. One ordinary-looking (if we discount the glowing eyes and vampire teeth) businessman coming out of the subway suddenly pounces! Diana easily mops the floor with him... slamming him into the wall. His eyes go normal, and he has no idea how he wound up there. He offers her all the money in his wallet not to involve the police. Just so happens Diana needs a few bucks for some non-ripped duds, so she takes him up on it. She chops him in his carotid to ensure she gets far enough away from him in case he "goes red" again.
And so, she buys herself a new non-ripped outfit and peruses the web at an internet cafe. Imagine a time before folks didn't carry the internet around with them in their pockets all the time! I should mention that the computer she uses is one of those old chunky Macs with the bright colored housing around the monitor... haven't thought about one of those in... probably 15 years! As she leaves the cafe, a pair of elderly folks take notice... and their eyes glow red! They follow her back onto the street.
Diana's no dummy, she knows she's being tailed. She leads the couple into an empty park... which Diana knows is usually empty, so it would seem that her amnesia is limited to things about herself. Anyway, before they can jump her... she grabs them... and before she can question them, they whither away to dust.
Confused and frustrated, she plops down on a park bench to think. In a nearby tree, it would appear that a pigeon and a squirrel are having a full-blown conversation. The pigeon flies off, and Diana gets it in her head that she ought to follow. It's a good thing too... because it leads her to... her number one fan?
The young lady excitedly invites Diana inside... and she accepts. Her small basement apartment is almost completely decorated with Wonder Woman tchotchkes... and it's here that Diana learns that she is actually Princess Diana... otherwise known as, well... you know. She ain't buyin' it.
The fan, Becca Doherty, intends to prove it... and makes sure there's nobody on the streets before asking Diana to... spin! Diana's still not convinced, but in order to pacify her pal... spins! Before long, she is Wonder Woman... only without her bracelets or tiara.
Wonder Woman is still confused, however, it just so happens that Becca has been keeping a scrapbook of Diana's exploits since she arrived on the scene. Convenient, sure... but a helluva way to give a new reader some exposition without it feeling forced. We (and she) learn about Paradise Island, and Diana's upbringing... her tenderness as well as her combat prowess. The story continues to include Steve Trevor, the man who arrived and would ultimately change her life. I should mention that, at the moment, Diana is dating... a different Trevor... Trevor Barnes.
We shift scenes to a place that reminds me of Zeal from ChronoTrigger. I'm not entirely sure where we are, but there are Amazons here, including Artemis and Chancellor Phillipus. They are concerned that they haven't seen Diana in two-weeks... in fact, nobody has seen her. She's skipped out on Justice League meetings and everything. While they talk, a panicked Catalyn arrives to inform them that she had just returned from Olympus... where she found that all of the Gods have disappeared!
We shift scenes again, this time we're back on Earth... the Deccan Plateau in India to be (more) precise. It's here that we (well, I... for all I know, you already knew him) meet Trevor Barnes. He's arrived at a small settlement in search of a called Darryl Souder. The locals tell him that his friend has entered the "cycle of rebirth"... which, back in 2003 India didn't mean you were getting a bi-weekly ongoing... instead it meant you was dead. Trevor is a bit incredulous... and asks to be taken to the last place he was seen. They take him into the fields... where it is believed that demons tread. Barnes manages to find Souder's body, however, when he goes to touch it... it turns to dust!
And that dust stirs into a dust devil, and begins to spin out of control. At this point, Trevor begins to hear a voice... one he's heard before. He looks to the sky and sees Karisin, the Hindu God of Wealth looming over the city. She speaks to him of receiving sacraments. No sooner does a plane arrive, with news of a dire emergency in Zambia which requires his attention. At this point, Karisin has vanished.
Back at Becca's apartment, Diana realizes that there is someone or something tracking her... trying to kill her, and so she decides that she might be able to buy herself more time by... changing her appearance. She asks for a pair of scissors and plunges them into her hair... until, Becca stops her. She cries that it is sacrilege to do such a thing, but agrees to perform the haircut for her... as luck would have it she is a hairstylist by trade.
She says it's better for her to do it, because if Diana does it herself, it would look like she stuck her head in a blender. Hmm... it's funny you say that, Becca... considering the "style" you foist upon her. After the deed is done, Diana bids Becca adieu... and heads off on her way to the Amazonian Embassy.
The issue wraps up on, of all places, Oa. There's a mean bit of energy at work... and it's causing all sorts of havoc at the center of the universe.
--
Well, I'll be damned... this was a pretty good jumping on point. As I read through this today, I'm about 90% certain that I never had before. I gotta figure that I got home... saw that it was a "Part 2", had thoughts about heading back to see if I might find Part 1... then ate and slept... and completely spaced it.
I have somehow amassed a decent-sized collection of Wonder Woman in the time since... mostly grabbing whatever I could out of the cheap-o bins, which, lemme tell ya... pre-New 52! Wonder Woman is an absolute rarity in the cheap-o's in my neck of the woods... so they immediately stand out. I just haven't really had the opportunity to sit down and give them a fair shot. I'm probably at a point in my fandom where I need to do a little less buying and a lot more reading.
Now, for the issue... it was a good jumping on point, yes. We got some Paradise Island (which I'm gonna call it here because I can't spell Theme... Thema... Themy... ya know, the other name) backstory and we were introduced to some of the current cast. With all that said... was it a good issue? Well, I enjoyed it... so, I'd say yeah... this was a good issue. Having Diana be partially amnesiac for this issue was an excellent narrative tool to allow exposition to be shared without it feeling like we were being clobbered by it. Having her run into her #1 fan was a nice touch as well... it facilitates there being a scrapbook from which to educate her... and me. Really liked that.
Now... the "big deal" of the book, Diana sticks her head in a blender. I kid, but... wow, that's not a good look for her... for the couple of panels we see it. I definitely gotta say she looks excellent on the (Adam Hughes) cover though. He makes the new-look work in all of the covers for this arc. It's funny how back in 2003, after the initial mainstream reaction to the "event", it kinda just went away. Nobody really complained about it... nobody swore off the book... nobody made any silly comments. Maybe that's just because this is from the halcyon days before Twitter and Facebook (you can follow me at both places by the way, links on the top right) where people could lob complaints and insults at a creative team without abandon.
I'm thinking about when, in 2010, J. Michael Straczynski took over the title and Diana was put in those Jim Lee designed duds, which included the tiny jacket and pants. People were ticked... and that was just an outfit. What Simonson and Ordway did in 2003 was a much more (relatively) permanent change to the character. I mean, she could have kept the shorter hair from that point on for all we know... it's not like she had a movie coming out back then.
Hindsight (and Google) tells us that this new look only lasts until Greg Rucka arrives on the title about 6 months down the line. I haven't read this arc through, so I'm unsure if there is any in-story reason for her rapid hair growth, or if the next creative team just decided to go back to the way it was. If I remember right, she didn't appear in JLA with this look... or anywhere outside this title, not that that really matters.
Overall... I think this was a lot of fun. A nice introduction to the character, a strange, almost horror-inspired threat, and nice dialogue and art. I now really want to see what I missed in Part One of Game of the Gods. I'd certainly recommend this to Wonder Woman fans, new and old. Great novelty value with her new appearance, and a good story to boot. This is available digitally.
Hope everyone who got out to the Thursday showing of the film had a Wonder-ful time!
--
Interesting Ads:
Superman #701 (September, 2010)
"Grounded, Part One"
Writer - J. Michael Straczynski
Penciller - Eddy Barrows
Inker - J.P. Mayer
Colorist - Rod Reis
Letterer - John J. Hill
Assistant Editor - Wil Moss
Editor - Matt Idelson
Cover Price: $2.99
Remember that time, back a few years before the New-52! when Superman left Earth to futz around on New Krypton? Yeah, me neither... because I kinda walked away around that time.
Remember at the end of that story where we were told that the same guy who saved Spider-Man from the Byrne/Mackie reboot was going to do the same thing for the Man of Steel? That I remember, because it led to me buying Superman books again.
Remember when we all got through the first issue and sorta scratched our heads and furrowed our brows? Well, if you don't... you're about to.
--
It's the south side of Philadelphia, and a few neighborhood fellas are gathered around the open hood of an old pickup truck. They know there's something wrong with the rig, but just can't agree on what. A passerby sticks his head in and suggests they take a look at the fuel line. Well, how in the world would a random dude know what's wrong? Well, if that dude's got x-ray vision... ya may wanna listen to what he's gotta say.
Superman has just started his walking tour of the United States, and in the excitement, he finds himself hounded by the press. Nobody can seem to wrap their head around why the Man of Steel is just... walking. And by nobody, I mean in and out of this book. The reporters posit that he might be on some sort of secret mission... or maybe he was exposed to "Red K" and lost his powers. Red K? Isn't this post-Crisis? Did Red Kryptonite (besides the Mxy-made stuff) come back and I missed it/forgot? One especially portly reporter suggests that Superman can no longer fly, and he's kind of a jerk about it. To prove him wrong... and up the ante on jerkiness, Superman grabs him and flies him ten-thousand feet into the sky. Wow, you... er, showed 'em, Supes!
As he walks away from the press gang, he is approached by a very special reporter... Lois Lane. She asks what's going on, and even questions if he had been exposed to "Red K"... oy. She asks what he's planning... and how she can explain his absence. All valid questions, however, some might be missing... What's the big idea? Didn't you just get back from New Krypton? Are you really leaving me for another year? Are we still married? Ya know, stuff like that.
We hop scenes to a small diner... and I think the young man with the camera around his neck is supposed to be Peter Parker. JMS wrote Spider-Man, donchaknow. Anyhoo, inside Superman is considering what he should have for lunch. He really wants a Philly cheese steak, but only has enough cash for a small salad. I know I'm not Superman or anything, but that just feels like poor planning. The waitress tells him it's on the house, but he insists that he pay. He cleans their stock room in exchange for a meal. After all, he's just an ordinary dude... who can organize a stock room in less than a second.
That night he runs afoul of a group of drug dealers. One especially stupid one gets right in his face. The dealer just starts laying into Superman... telling him there's nothing he can do to stop them... or even scare them. In response, Superman uses his x-ray vision to locate all of the illegal drugs in the neighborhood... and setting them on fire with his heat vision.
The dealers scatter trying to save their stashes... and a... okay, we're going to do this one straight. A young boy approaches Superman and offers him a piece of candy to thank him. Superman then... sigh... tells the little kid that he wants him to deliver a message to the drug dealers for him. Tell them that Superman's got his eye on them. Sounds like a splendid idea, don't it? You send a tiny little kid up to the angry and armed drug dealer... to... deliver a threat?! What in all the hells is Superman thinking? In the nearly 500 posts on this blog, I've really done my best not to curse... this is probably the most tempted I've been to break that streak.
With that nonsense out of the way, Superman... continues to walk. He catches some stupid teenagers about to run a red light, and checks out an older man's heart... and then, and then, he comes upon... the jumper. There is a crowd gathered at the foot of a building. Police are trying to keep someone from jumping... and Superman decides to check it out. He meets a young lady who has had a pretty rough time of late. She says she won't talk to him unless he promises to let her jump if she decides to... and, oh boy, he does.
The police on the ground are confused... and so am I. She lists her grievances, her mother recently passed, she didn't grow up to change the world, her high school dreams never came true, she has to work in a cubicle... all that quarter-life crisis stuff. Superman's words of wisdom are tantamount to: Life's tough. Wow, I'm suddenly inspired to throw myself off of something high.
And so, he and the jumper stare at each other all day and into the night. Superman finally speaks and tells her that... get this... if she thinks she'll never have a "happy day", then she should jump! This has got to be a prank, right? Like, Superman's just trolling us... right? Anyway, the girl realizes that she'll probably wind up having another "happy day", and so she doesn't kill herself.
On the ground, an officer asks Superman if he's have really let her jump... and Superman doesn't answer. Are you... kidding me? Not even a wink? This is bad, you guys.
The issue wraps up with... oh God, not this scene. Superman is approached by an ordinary guy who asks him why he's not... ya know, being super. Instead of giving a friendly... or at least a non-confrontational... response, Superman starts quoting Thoreau. Who is this pompous horse's ass... and why is he wearing Superman's costume?! Thankfully, this is where we get off the walking tour.
--
You guys...
...
sigh...
Well, that was the first part of Grounded. This is the first time I cracked the cover on this one since the Summer of 2010... and, holy hell... I'm more annoyed at it now than I was back then! I mean, at the time we didn't realize that (had the New-52! not petered out) this was going to be one of the final storylines for this version and volume of Superman (then again... neither did DC, regardless of what they say). With hindsight, maybe I'm judging this more harshly than I otherwise would... though, that's not to say this was anything less than dull, preachy, pretentious... and just wildly unpleasant. Let's also remember that this was the only Superman book at this time, Action Comics had been taken over by Lex Luthor.
Let's start with Superman sending a neighborhood boy into danger to "send a message". We've got Superman burning up the stashes for a gaggle of drug dealers... and then asks a boy to deliver a message to them. Let's play that out... Superman just sent a kid to talk to... threaten, actually... a group of angry, dangerous, violent... armed (!) drug dealers! Good lookin' out, Supes. Pathetic.
Next, Superman and the jumper. Superman has always been a symbol of hope... an inspiration to we "mere mortals"... and here we have him giving a hopeless young lady a "take it or leave it" kinda speech, rather than anything inspiring. He's all, Yeah life's tough... if you wanna die, then die... if not, don't. What the hell is that? That's not Superman. Gotta say, I never wanna see J. Michael Straczynski try and talk anyone off a ledge.
Remember how during the preamble I mentioned that Superman was futzin' off planet for a long while? Well, now that he's back... instead of being with, ya know... his wife... he sets out on an interminable self-indulgent walking tour. Yeah, Lois... see ya in a couple years... ya know, unless our continuity gets erased in the interim.
And Superman quoting Thoreau? Good friggin' night! What pretentious holier-than-thou garbage is this... and why is it coming out of Superman's mouth? Do you see Superman as a guy who would lecture ordinary people in a way that would make them feel inferior? I don't. This is such a bad issue, folks...
Speaking of Superman as superior... how about that scene at the beginning where he gives those glib answers to the reporters. It's so strange that the entire point of this ridiculous story is to put Superman at the same level as the ordinary American/Human... and he talks to these people like they are so far below him. Glib and dismissive... that is, unless you question his motives... then he'll fly you into orbit to "put you in your place". What an ass.
I will say... it looks pretty. Eddy Barrows and company do a ridiculous amount of heavy lifting here... but it's still not enough to make this something I'd ever suggest people should check out.
Millennium... you're off the hook!
--
Interesting Ads:
