Action Comics #692 (October, 1993)
"And Who, Disguised as Clark Kent?"
Writer - Roger Stern
Co-Plotter - Karl Kesel
Pencils - Jackson Guice
Inks - Denis Rodier
Letters - Albert DeGuzman
Colors - Glenn Whitmore
Associate Editor - Frank Pittarese
Editor - Mike Carlin
Cover Price: $1.50
If you were to take a poll and ask those folks who trawl the 25/50-cent bins which books show up most often during their hunts, you're probably going to get a bunch of different answers... though most, I'd assume would be early-Image (or early-Image adjacent).
If you were to ask me though... it'd be this book, and lemme tell ya, it's not even close! Action Comics #692, for being such an important book (as we're about to talk about), is my most tripped-over weed in the cheap-o bins... and has been for well over a decade!
This is all apropos of nothing, of course... just something that immediately comes to mind when this cover passes my gaze.
Let's get to it!
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We open with our newly-returned Superman digging through the rubble of a building destroyed during the brouhaha with Doomsday... where he manages to find Clark Kent, alive and well! Hey, that takes care of that! Lois rushes over to embrace her missing fiance, before posing for a great photo-op.
Superman is pulled aside by Cat Grant for a statement. While they talk a slimy fellow rushes up to inform Superman (and the world) that the rights to the name "Superman" now belong to Rex Leech Enterprises... and that teen-age Superman clone!
Superman doesn't seem to be sweating this, and just figures he'll have a chat with the kid somewhere down the line. Speaking of Superboy (and the other three would-be Supermen), the news broadcast next jumps to a "where are they now?" segment. After sacrificing himself out at Coast City, the Eradicator is down and out at S.T.A.R. Labs. Steel was also injured during that to-do, and is expected to make a full recovery. Superboy, er, "the Teen Superman" has been seen canoodling with "LexCorp's" Supergirl, and the Cyborg has been confirmed as having been "destroyed".
We rejoin Superman in the sky, when he is approached by Lex Luthor (II) in his helicopter. He wants to know what Superman has done with his Supergirl. Turns out, she's been pretty evasive since the business in Coast City. Superman assures him that he's not Supergirl's keeper before taking off. Luthor seethes... but only for a moment. He now realizes this is the real Superman... which means, he still has the chance to kill him!
Back to Lois and "Clark", who are at Metropolis General. Clark is examined and given the medical stamp of approval. To explain his phenomenal shape, Clark claims that the place he'd been "buried" for the past month was well-stocked with food and water... and plenty of room for him to keep up with his calisthenics.
Meanwhile at S.T.A.R. Labs, the Eradicator is loaded into one of those fluid-filled tubes that people always seem to be loaded into anytime they visit S.T.A.R. Labs. Many of the sci-guys (and gals) assume he's a lost cause... until they pick up a heartbeat!
We shift scenes back to the Kent apartment, where Superman and Clark finally have a "private" face-to-face confrontation. Superman's all "hands off my woman", Clark goes "oh yeah, try and make me". They let Lois decide, and she picks Superman... which was always her way, wasn't it? Anyhoo, it's revealed here that "Clark Kent" was actually a shape-shifted Supergirl!
The Kents thank her for the help, and she heads off to return to her man, Lex Luthor (II). Lois and Clark have a bit of a reunion... until Clark remembers that he never checked in with Pa after his heart-episode. If you recall, Pa and Superman fought side-by-side on the other side during Adventures of Superman #500 (which I could've sworn we'd discussed here... must be getting my Treadmilling confused with my Infiniting).
Anyhoo, Superman goes to dial up his folks... when suddenly the scene dramatically shifts. Next we know, we're in the office of Dr. Occult, who Superman recognizes from an earlier adventure (which hadn't been told yet). He's here to spill the beans on exactly how Superman was able to cheat death.
He first takes them back in time to the battle between Superman and Doomsday. With every punch they experience, (present day) Superman appears to feel it! It's as though he's going through the same ordeal all over again. Occult assures Lois that Superman ought to be strong enough to survive this time around.
As the trip down memory lane continues... Superman dies. Occult explains that after "death", as Superman's spirit was vacating his body... that body was still soaking up energy from the Sun. Also, that Bibbo's efforts in resuscitating him were actually helpful!
Next stop... Superman's coffin. It's just Occult and Lois for this leg of the tour... present-day Superman has been kayoed. Occult drops even more knowledge. Ya see by this point, Superman's spirit did evacuate the body... however, all of the stored energy inside the body managed to preserve it.
All this explains how Superman was able to fight side-by-side with Jonathan Kent during the opening salvo of "the Return".
At this point, the Eradicator awoke and sought to claim Superman's body. The body was taken, and placed in a Kryptonian Regeneration Matrix. During the process, the Eradicator took some of Superman's energies... and as we know, briefly attempted to usurp his role.
And now... Superman's back! Lois wonders if this means Superman is unkillable so long as there's a Sun. Occult assures her that that's not the case at all... and that it was due to the confluence of a whole lot of factors that he was able to come back at all.
Next thing we know, Lois and Clark wake up in a field.
But not just any field... it's actually part of the Kent Farm! We wrap up with Lois, Clark and the Kents having a joyous reunion.
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Well, there we have it... so many questions answered in a single issue, that it's kind of mind-boggling, ain't it? Could not imagine something like this happening today. Explanations today are dragged across six-issues (if we're lucky!) and often wind up rendered moot with the arrival of subsequent creative teams.
It's hard to consider just how tight everything was back then. 90's comics get a ton of flack (some warranted, some not so much) for being vapid and shallow, but... c'mon, this is some solid stuff that doesn't just tie a bow on what came before, but spurs out into several new story threads.
Let's take a look at the explanation... by first being thankful that it wasn't the Phantom Stranger who took Lois and Clark on their magical mystery tour (though, he is sorta Phantom Stranger-adjacent... they're both part of that Trenchcoat Brigade we talked about a few months back).
The actual explanation though? It worked well enough. I mean, we're dealing with the life, death, and return of a superpowered alien here, so it's not like we should go into this expecting some crazy scientific deal... it's your standard "spirit left the physical husk" type'a stuff... only with the hows, whys, and whens included... and, of course the spirit reoccupying the body bit.
I appreciated the "where are they now?" bits discussing the four impostor Supermen. We didn't need full-blown visits with them here, and a panel a'piece (Eradicator excepted) was good enough. This wasn't their story this time out... but, it's good to know there's still "stuff" going on with them.
Overall, it's not quite business as usual for the Super-books... even though the Real Steel Deal is back to wearing the colors. This feels kind of like an evolution from where the books were pre-Doomsday, and I gotta say, it's a pretty welcome change. That isn't to say I didn't like/appreciate what came before... but, a quarter-century removed, this feels more like "my" Superman going forward. This issue has been collected... well, at least the "Clark gets dug out of the rubble" bit, and is available digitally (though, I'm sure if you really want it... dollars to donuts, it's in your local cheap-o bin!).
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Letters Page:
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Superboy (vol.3) #1 (January, 2011)
"Smallville Attacks! Part One"
Writer - Jeff Lemire
Art - Pier Gallo
Colors - James Grant
Letters - John J. Hill
Assistant Editor - Wil Moss
Editor - Matt Idelson
Cover Price: $2.99
Ya know what's annoying... how if I mention say, Walmart or Target while in the presence of my phone, my social media will suddenly be bombarded with ads for those places... but, my spellchecker/auto-correct, with as much as I've written about comic books over the past three years, still puts the squiggly-red line under the word "Superboy". Ya kiddin' me with this?
Worth noting, Superboy often auto-corrects to "superbly"... could that be an indication of what we're in for with this very issue?!
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We open with Conner Kent, back from the dead and now living in Smallville. As he sits atop a grain silo he thinks to himself what his life might've been like if he'd had a normal childhood... or, ya know, any childhood at all! While he's thinking about this, we see a little boy dressed like a superhero frolicking in the fields. As Kon rubs a grain between his fingers, Krypto barks, informing him that they're not alone. Superboy finds himself joined by... oh, c'mon, the Phantom Stranger.
The Stranger comes with bad tidings, as he normally does. He tells Superboy that the fate of someone close to him is hanging in the balance... and that he should return home post-haste. Just so happens, at that very moment, Ma Kent is stood atop a chair watering some plants on the porch... she slips, but thanks to the warning, Kon is able to swoop in just in the nick of time.
He tells Ma about his recent visit with the Stranger... and wonders if his staying in Smallville might actually do more harm than good. Ma assures him that there's nothing to worry about... and Ma's got a way of being pretty convincing. Worth noting, if you're reading the panels, read these backwards... the page has this clockwise-circular gimmick going on.
We rejoin that tot dressed like a superhero as he happens across a critter that looks to have been sucked dry. Could the Phantom Stranger have been there to warn of a Chupacabra outbreak?! Well, no... instead, a giant purple mass of a man bursts onto the scene and chases the boy away!
We shift scenes to Smallville High School, where Conner Kent is grabbing some books from his locker. He is approached by Lori Luthor (Lex's niece, natch... which also makes her Conner's sorta-kinda "cousin"). She asks why he's been avoiding her... and he coyly tells her he hasn't been. He's just been busy with "other stuff".
Back in the fields, that Purple Beast is trudging his way toward town... leaving a whole lotta dehydrated flora and fauna in his wake. Is it okay to reveal that this is Parasite yet?
After school, Conner heads to a diner... where he meets an old man. The fella informs him that today is the 154th anniversary of Smallville's founding. He hands over a little blobby figurine he'd whittled and wishes Conner a "Happy Birthday". Conner returns the favor... well, more like he returns the sentiment, it's not like he hands over a whittled figurine himself.
On his way out, Conner runs into Simon Valentine... his best pal in Smallville, who naturally has red hair. That's kinduva "thing" with Super-Pals. Simon pulls him aside because he's got biiiiig news. Conner is certain it has something to do with his army of trained frogs, but nope... it's even bigger than that. Ya see, Simon has figured out that Conner Kent... is Superboy!
Before the Boy of Steel can even begin to digest this revelation, he is attacked by that purple beast Parasite!
Parasite is there... to kill Superman. Kon tears off his shirt, and lets the baddie know he's got the wrong dude... but if he wants to get to the "main event", Parasite's going to have to go through him. As luck would have it, that's exactly what Parasite wanted to do! Ya see, he's going to drain Superboy of his power... and use it against the Real Steel Deal!
After getting punched through a Barber Shop window, Simon shouts that Superboy should take the fight off the street... because, ya know, they're tearing the place up. Superboy tackles Parasite and rams him right back into the wheat fields so they might continue. Unfortunately, upon landing... Superboy ain't good for much!
He realizes he's going to have to count on his tactile telekinesis... and attempts to use it to lift up and hurl a tractor. Only, he's not strong enough at the moment!
As Parasite stomps ever closer, Superboy realizes that it might not take the biggest thing around to put the baddie down.
He focuses his attention on the tens-of-thousands of wheat grains in the area... and absolutely bombards Parasite with 'em! It's actually pretty gross if you think about it... which is why we probably shouldn't!
Simon rushes on the scene to see if "Conner" is alright. Superboy informs him that it's, ya know, not cool to call him by his civilian name when he's in his work clothes. I mean, c'mon, that's Super-Pal 101 stuff there.
Suddenly the flora around them starts going nuts... and we wrap up with the arrival of Poison Ivy, who is fearful she's too late to save Smallville!
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Ya know, it says a lot about a book when it can open with the friggin' Phantom Stranger, and close with Poison friggin' Ivy... and I can still give it the ol' "two thumbs up"! This was a wonderfully enjoyable issue, and a fine start to this new volume of Superboy.
Now, if you're a regular reader/listener, my feelings on the Phantom Stranger ain't a big secret. I find him, like many of DC's mysterious/undead/ethereal characters... to be rather a bore. They seem to pop in and either spout some cryptic nonsense, or just serve as a hand-wavin' deus ex machina. Luckily, he only occupies a couple of pages here... and he facilitates a nice discussion between Conner and Ma.
As for Poison Ivy. She's kinda up there with Ra's Al Ghul in the pantheon of "Bat villains I never need to see again". Especially if we were to jump back to the Winter of 2010/2011. Talk about having a lotta Bat-Books today, back pre-Flashpoint, half the line was like Bat-Books on steroids. I mean, the Avengers would raise an eyebrow and say "Innat a bit much?" So, yeah... seeing a (traditionally) Bat-Family character here didn't exactly rock my socks... but, it also didn't make me not want to pick up the next issue, which is the most important thing.
I thought having Conner move to Smallville and live with (the relatively-recently-widowed) Ma Kent was a great idea! Thought this was a great way to make Smallville relevant, and tell stories that didn't necessarily have to take place in the big city. Also looks like Lemire was pulling together a great little supporting cast for the kid!
The fight with Parasite was pretty great... and concluded with a wonderfully clever use of Conner's much-lauded (by him) tactile telekinesis! This one act of understanding the potential value in "little things" showed a (much welcome) leap in maturation for the Boy of Steel.
So, yeah... I loved this issue. With that said... Why am I so annoyed, then?
Well... this book is yet another example of some of the great things DC had going on before flushing 'em down the toilet less than a year later. Actually, if we're to go by The "official" Chris is on Infinite Earths "hot-take"... this issue had the same cover-date as Flash (vol.3) #6... which is where I personally feel like the "other shoe dropped". That was the issue/month (to my mind) where DC decided that Flashpoint was going to be something more than just the next big Flash event.
So... was this book always doomed to a short life? Did DC launch this knowing it wouldn't survive the year... or, was it already in the works before the seminal beats of The New-52! were in the ether? Whatever the case, this series is a shining example of the good-to-great books DC was putting out before the plug was pulled.
Speaking of "great"... how 'bout this art? Where'd this Pier Gallo come from... and why haven't we seen so more from him?! I mean, holy smokes, this was some wonderful work! Gotta say, this is a top-flight book... and it's a shame it had to be sacrificed for whateverthehell The New-52! Superboy was all about.
Overall... yeah, check this one out! I know Kon-El is about to make his return in the pages of Young Justice (vol.3), but I'm not sure he's going to be the same fella as the one we read here. He's still in his 90's togs... which might just be a "funny, ha-ha"... or might be an indication of where he was "nyoinked" from. Whatever the case, this series is worth your time. This issue has been collected as part of Superboy, Volume 1: Smallville Attacks... and it's also available digitally.
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(Not the) Letters Page:
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Titans East Special #1 (January, 2008)
"The Fickle Hand, Part One: Go East, Young Man."
Writer - Judd Winick
Pencils - Ian Churchill
Inks - Norm Rapmund, Andy Lanning & Jon Sibal
Colors - Edgar Delgado
Letters - Comicraft
Assistant Editor - Adam Schlagman
Editor - Eddie Berganza
Cover Price: $3.99
The late 2000's. It was the best of times... oh, who am I even trying to kid... it was the worst of times (to be a Titans fan).
Anyone who might be following my reviews of the contemporary (post-Rebirth) Teen Titans (vol.6) over at Weird Science DC Comics knows that up until a few months ago, I was very hard on the direction (or lack thereof) of the book. It was the same thing every month, high on angst with the looming threat that somebody was going to quit the team at any time. Rarely an issue would go by without someone quitting, threatening to quit, get kicked off, or threatened to be kicked off. It was an awful run.
But then... if you're a tenured Titans fan... your mind might take you back to the post-Geoff Johns/pre-J.T. Krul era... and I realize, "Hey! It could always be worse!".
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We open back in the long ago during a Jenni! concert that has been hijacked by... the Joker! (I did check around to see if Jenni! was a reference to some obscure Golden/Silver-Age character, but she doesn't appear to be). In fact, it's not only the Joker... but Bizarro too! Man, I love me a Joker/Bizarro team-up... what a classic, right? Right??? Okay, in fairness, I'm sure they'd probably rubbed shoulders a time or two before this... I mean, World's Finest Comics was a thing for a very long time. Anyhoo, the Teen Titans are there to (try and) save the day! This looks like it would've taken place early in the New Teen Titans era, as Wally is a) still a member, and b) still Kid Flash.
Over the next several pages, the Titans look for an opening to attack the Joker (who is revealed to be handcuffed to the lovely and talented Jenni!), all the while Bizarro plays the heavy. Beast Boy transforms into a bee, and stings Joker on the cheek, which provides Robin the opportunity to use a 'rang to shatter the cuffs. Beast Boy then turns into an ape and rescues the girl.
Wally rushes the Joker and swipes his gun... only to find out that it's actually a ticking bomb inside a gun's housing! He runs it out into the bay where it explodes... 3 seconds early. The kinda thing that would add real drama in any story that isn't clearly a flashback!
As the Joker gloats over "killing" Kid Flash, he is suddenly overcome by emotion... yup, Raven's in the house. While gettin' high on the Joker's supply, she goes a little nutty herself (but thankfully doesn't give us like a half-dozen pages of her acting like the Joker).
Back with Bizarro, Starfire realizes that since Superman is powered by yellow sunlight, Bizarro might actually be de-powered by the same. Lucky for her, she appears to be right!
Just then, Wally returns (from dead) with a box under his arm. While he was gone, he swung by... I dunno, S.T.A.R. Labs or something, and picked up a chunk of Blue Kryptonite (which is actually steeped in Bizarro history)! This puts Bizarro down for good... for now.
Robin socks the Joker, and the Titans stand together atop the heap of baddies.
Then... we jump ahead to "now". Cyborg is trying to assemble a second team of Titans. This is post-Infinite Crisis, so the San Francisco-based (Cassie-Wonder Girl-led) iteration ain't doin' all that hot at the moment. Vic asks his usual running-buddies, but they just ain't feelin' it. Donna is off doing some Countdown-related stuff with Kyle Rayner, Beast Boy is hanging out with the All-New All-Old Doom Patrol, Roy is part of the Justice League of America... hell, even Lilith turns him down, and I'm sure she ain't doin' anything!
Finally, Vic reaches out to Dick Grayson... who also ain't feelin' it. Ya see, Cyborg has drafted some "newbies" and he wants the vets on board to help whip 'em into shape (yes, again). Nightwing says they were a great team once, and they may be a great team again... but now might not be the right time. They get nostalgic for a moment, before Dick asks Vic about these "newbies"...
And so, let's meet a few. First stop, Dawn and Holly Granger, the all-new Hawk & Dove! It seemed like they really wanted to play-up Holly (Hawk)'s sex appeal, and so naturally, we catch her in the shower. She tells Dawn about "some guy" she picked up the night before. More on that in a bit...
... or, right now. Next, we meet... Power Boy (complete with booby-window!). He talks about how last night he "got some" with a freaky girl who didn't mind wearing a Supergirl costume while they "did it"!
He goes for a swim before heading over to the first meeting of Teen Titans East. His teammates include, Little Barda, Anima (a Bloodlines buddy), (semi-obscure Charlton character) Son of Vulcan, Lagoon Boy, and, of course... Hawk & Dove.
Cyborg informs them that for this first training session, Power Boy is going to be something of a tackling dummy. The rest of the team are to track him down, and defeat him in combat... which is the case for the next dozen or so pages! During those pages, he exchanges banter with each teammate, and even learns that the freaky girl he was with the night before is now a member of his team! Each member of Titans East gets to sorta-kinda "show their stuff" during the brouhaha... which, sadly, isn't saying much.
The team eventually loses sight of Power Boy, and heads into the nearby woods to investigate... and what they find is, rather grim. A badly-burned Power Boy has been impaled on a tree branch!
Vic rushes in to see what's up, and suddenly beams of energy start raining down on the heroes... one of which goes right through poor Anima!
When Cyborg makes it to the clearing... the beams get a bit bigger... and by "a bit" I mean, a whole lot. A tremendous beam bears down, smashing into the team, and leaving a crater in its wake. To be continued...
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Okay, before we begin. I gotta say that being a decade-plus removed from this one, I didn't hate it as much as I did when I first read it. I didn't like it... but, I'm not as mad at it as I was back in the Winter of 2007. If you weren't reading the Titans back in the "nebulous interim" that was post-Infinite Crisis/pre-Final Crisis, you wouldn't know just how many team members were "sacrificed". This was the era of the Teen Titans "casket cover"... lotsa teen-age heroes were being thrown on the fire... and the fatigue was real!
Look at this cover... "Who Will Die?" That's your selling point? What is this, Heroes in Crisis?! I'm sorry, you're going to need more than that. Buying a book only to find out who dies? Really, if that's all you're interested in... just hang out on social media a week before the book comes out, some "pro" reviewer will undoubtedly spoil it. If that's all you're looking for... there's no reason to shell out four-bucks for this.
Let's put this book aside for a moment... and say, you missed out on it. Didn't even know it was a "thing". One day you head into the local comic shop, and see a bright-shiny Titans (vol.2) #1 sitting there on the shelf. You pick it up and take it home. Upon opening it, you're greeted with "The Fickle Hand, Part TWO". Part Two... in a #1 issue! What a mess.
Now, let's look at the issue itself. It's kinda empty. It's basically two big fight scenes separated by a couple of pages of exposition. Not sure why we needed the "This was Then..." bits, other than the desire to shoehorn the Joker into the issue. That's fair enough... not sure why it necessitated so many damned pages though.
Speaking of an embarrassment of pages... that training exercise probably didn't need twelve of 'em! I get that we want to try and flesh these newbies out... let 'em "show their stuff" before the big "gotcha". But, that only works if you don't spoil the fact that someone's going to die on the cover! We never get the opportunity to lose ourselves in the story... we're just looking for someone to die. We're anticipating the "gotcha" moment, so that when it finally happens... it doesn't really have the desired effect!
The expositional middle... was okay. It feels like the Titans are always in "rebuilding mode"... nobody can just tell a story about them coming together... there has to be some cockamamie reason behind it all. The past several times has been about "training the next bunch"... which... I mean, there's already a Teen Titans team... and before that, there was Young Justice. This is redundant... and I totally understand the "originals" wanting to be as far away from it as possible. This whole thing feels like a "here we go again" rather than... "Hell yeah, new Titans!"... which isn't the best way to launch a new series.
I suppose we could go into Power Boy and Hawk's cosplay sex... but, I mean, what can I say? It's pandering, crass, and ultimately unnecessary, but it's pretty much exactly what I'd expect from DC and Judd Winick at that point in time. Was this to give us a feeling of "loss"? It wasn't depicted as romantic in the slightest... and it's not like nu-Hawk has all that much time left among the living either. I dunno... the whole thing was just really off-putting.
Overall... I really don't know what to say. Back in 2007-2008 I'd give this a hard-pass, and suggest everyone else would too. Now? I still don't need this in my life, but that doesn't mean other folks won't dig it. The era of Titans-death-fatigue is in the distant rear-view at this point... and so, this might actually feel novel rather than just another few bodies being haphazardly thrown on the fire. It is worth noting, the art here is good. I had some problems with early Ian Churchill... he was very much in the Rob Liefeld-alikes list. You can still see some of the influence here, but it's softened quite a bit. This issue is available digitally if you're interested... but I would suggest holding off until you find it in the cheap-o bins instead.
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