DC Universe Holiday Special '09 (Huntress)
"Naughty or Nice"
Writer - J. Torres
Pencils - Hubert Khan Michael
Inks - Julio Ferreira
Colors - Tom Smith
Letters - Sal Cipriano
Editors - Adam Schlagman & Eddie Berganza
Looks like Huntress is going to be our sole female-led story this time out. Weird, we've looked at four or so of these Holiday Anthologies here at the blog, and I'm pretty sure only one of 'em had a Wonder Woman story in it! Not a great showing for one of the "trinity"... and certainly not something that'd happen during "current year", regardless of how boring Wonder Woman might be!
I kid, I kid... no, really... I don't. It's pretty well documented (here, and only here) that I find Wonder Woman to be, in most situations, almost aggressively dull. I'm happy we're getting the Huntress here.
--
We open in a candy store, where the shop owner is giving a young fella some side-eye. Ya see, the child happens to be African-American... and so, the owner thinks he might be up to no good. He even goes as far as having the poor kid empty his pockets to ensure he didn't steal anything! Huntress watches this all go down, and wonders if the Candyman should wind up on the "Naughty or Nice" list. After kicking the kid out of the shop, a white fella enters the scene, who is welcomed with open arms. Ya see where this one's going? Naturally, the white dude pulls out a pistol and proceeds to rob the joint!
After robbing the place, the thief steps outside... right into the path of the Huntress... she takes care of him pretty quick.
The story wraps up with the Candyman inviting that same African-American child back into the store and giving him a bunch of free sweets. Helena looks on and thinks that she's seen the "worst" the shop owner can do... and now she's considering moving him to the "nice" list. Wait'll she finds out about that refrigerator full of body parts he's got in his basement!
--
Is it too late to send this one back for a Wonder Woman story? I mean, barf.
These stories we're reading "after the staples" have been pretty weak... it's almost as though DC feels like most people would give up after reading two or three of the included stories... and that nobody would ever see any of this stuff! Well, they weren't counting on this idiot blogger, now were they?
So, whatta we got here? It's a classic (and heavy-handed) "Don't judge a book by its cover" story. We really could have ceased right after that opening caption... because that's as good as this story was going to get. It's cliche, it allows us all to feel kind of superior, and... well, it really doesn't do a whole lot more.
As with a lot of these wildly-weak stories we've looked at over the past couple of weeks, the art is really nice. HKM really makes the best of the four pages he's given... and navigates to a good story with his work. The most interesting part of this story for me is the fact that this particular candy store had a pretty big Sugar-Free candy section! As a dude with a sweet-tooth who's (mostly) cut sugar from his diet... that's something I'd definitely appreciate!
Tomorrow: Raggin' around the Christmas Tree (err, Menorah)...
DC Universe Holiday Special '09 (Red Tornado)
"A Night Before Christmas Story"
Writer - David Tischman
Pencils - Adam Archer
Inks - Sandra Hope
Colors - Jonny Rench
Letters - John J. Hill
Editors - Adam Schlagman & Eddie Berganza
It takes some doing to have a Red Tornado story in your Holiday anthology... and for it not to be the most far-out one in the ish!
Let's check in with the Smiths!
--
We open on... Christmas Eve, and Reddy is taking care of some last-minute shopping for his daughter, Traya. Ya see, the hot toy this season is the Ecko-Gecko doll... and every store in a three-state radius is completely sold-out. In fairness to those maintaining inventory... it is Christmas Eve, perhaps our John Smith should've considered looking for the hottest toy going a bit earlier. Or, hell, it's 2009... look online! Anyhoo, a little old lady saunters up, revealing she has a Ecko-Gecko doll she'd happily part with... for two-hunnid bones!
Reddy scoffs, claiming that to be a 345% increase on the MSRP... so, I guess he's never heard of "war profiteering". His hesitation provides the opportunity for a fellow shopper to rush up and offer the walleyed old biddy $250! Ya snooze, ya lose Tornado!
So, ticked off and completely disappointed with humanity, our Red Tornado whips up several cyclones... collecting all of the snow from outside and depositing it right at the exit points of the building... in effect, trapping everyone inside the store. Let's hope there isn't a fire.
The patrons inside the shop start freaking out, wondering just how they'll get home to their families (and demanding children). A man with a bushy mustache suggests that this all might be a sign... giving them the time and opportunity to reflect on what Christmas is really all about. John suggests they all join in and sing carols along with the store's P.A. system. Really, dude? Okay. Anyhoo, a clerk emerges from one of the aisles to calm everyone down and assure them that the Fire Department will soon be there to let 'em all out.
Our story concludes on Christmas Morning, where an excited Traya hops into her parents' bed to wake 'em up and wish 'em a Merry Christmas. John asks if she wants to see what Santa brought her... to which she says "Nah, I got all day for that..." and would rather spend time being thankful for what she already has. Bulllllllll...oney.
--
Sometimes, and I'm not sure if this is due to some of the stories we've already read during Christmas on Infinite Earths this year, but sometimes... it's hard to suspend disbelief to fully enjoy a "slice of life" story. I get that "looking for the hot toy of the season" is a story that has been so overused at this point that it almost writes itself... and I understand how superior we can all feel in the reading, because certainly none of us would act like these ugly, greedy, selfish people in the store... but, c'mon... Red Tornado's in the Justice League. He couldn't give the Flash a call and have him scoop up an Ecko-Gecko from the factory in China? We've seen Wally do something just like that twice already this season!
It'd be one thing if this was a story looking to be comedic... but, I didn't get that at all. This was a commentary on consumerism... in an overpriced comic book they expected people to shell out six bucks for! From an industry that tries non-stop to whup its ever-shrinking fandom into a frenzy with incentives and variants and gimmicks... is this really the place to look down our collective noses at people who want to buy things? Not a good look.
This was certainly not my favorite story in this book... I know what it's trying to "learn" us, but it fails. It fails as a comedy, because it isn't funny... it fails as satire/commentary, because it's far too unsubtle. I mean, the only things these ugly consumers were missing were snouts and curly tails. Our hero throws a tantrum, and potentially endangers everyone who made him upset. Just not great. The ending... well, again, I see what they were going for... but, it came across as too unauthentic to properly receive.
Tomorrow: The Huntress decides whether you've been naughty or nice
DC Universe Holiday Special '09 (Deadman)
"Unbearable Loss"
Story/Art - Scott Kolins
Colors - C.P. Smith
Letters - Jared K. Fletcher
Editors - Adam Schlagman & Eddie Berganza
Who's ready for a... darker Holiday story... that only barely touches on the fact that it happens during Christmastime?
Yeah... me neither! Let's do it anyway though...
--
We open with a look at the front cover of the Gotham... er, Gazette? Is that the official newspaper of Gotham? I dunno... the fact that it's a newspaper is all that matters at the moment. The headline reads that there are 13 children missing... courtesy of the Scarecrow. Oh, also... it's Christmas Day. We're introduced to a homeless boy named William, who is using newspapers to keep warm... and a woman named Karen, who simply-put cannot deal with what the paper reports.
Ya see, this Karen... just so happens to be, the Scarecrow's Mother! Dang, she looks pretty good for her age! She blames herself for her son's numerous crime-sprees... and it looks like she's really feeling this one. Probably because she's just received confirmation of her guilt... via her evil offspring!
From here we get a quick-n-dirty origin story for the Scarecrow. He was taken from Karen as a baby and raised by his Great Grandmother... who, from all accounts, was a real piece of work. She basically tortured children... and twisted little Johnny into the psychopath he'd become.
Unable to cope with the guilt, Karen ascends to the top of her apartment building... and dives off!
Here's where Deadman enters the story. He sneaks into Karen's body... and manages to sorta-kinda save her life... well, her soul, anyway. Deadman/Karen splash into the water below... which is convenient. Much easier to finish this story in the water, rather than, ya know... on the pavement. I wonder how much water-front apartment living in Gotham costs? Maybe Mrs. Scarecrow is doing really well for herself?
In the drink, Deadman and Karen('s soul) have a chat. He more or less tells her to let go of all of her guilt... and she cries ethereal tears.
The homeless boy from earlier, William notices Karen's body... and rushes in to help her. As he pulls her out of the water and attempts to resuscitate her... Deadman tries to impress upon her the value of her life. And so, she chooses to live.
We wrap up the following day... still really bummed out about the Scarecrow's most recent crime. Looks like he got away with it... which, doesn't say all that much for, ya know, Batman. Wandering the streets, she happens across young William... and she offers to take him out for lunch.
--
Well that was kind of weird, wunnit?
Not so much a Christmas story... heck, feels kind of like an inventory story that, as luck would have it, just happened to include a newspaper that they could date as December, 25!
I feel like I've used the "of two minds" excuse to fence-sit a few times over the past couple of weeks... but, here we are again. As a story on it's own... it's okay. It's well-told, and has all of the nuts and bolts of an above-average anthology chapter. It fits into (the then) continuity, and doesn't really hurt anything. Sometimes that's all we can hope for!
On the other hand, this kind of illustrates one of my main problems with the Deadman character. There's really no way Karen should have survived the fall, simply because she "chose life". There's also the convenience of her just happening to live in an apartment building within inches of deep water. I mean, I get it... it's a Miracle, yadda yadda yadda... but, again... it's a Deadman story where he can more or less snap his fingers to remove any possible tension or stakes. As you all may know... that ain't my favorite sort of deal.
Overall though... I dunno, it ended on a high note. One can hope that maybe Karen decided to take William in, to give her a second chance at raising a productive member of society... and give him a warm place to sleep. Not bad.
Tomorrow: Rudolph the Red Tor-nay-do...
DC Universe Holiday Special '09 (Captain Marvel)
"Home for Christmas"
Writer - Steve Horton
Art/Colors - Afua Richardson
Letters - John J. Hill
Editors - Adam Schlagman & Eddie Berganza
Today we look at the second (of two) single-page offerings in this Holiday Special. Man, this ish is the gift that keeps on giving, innit?
--
It's Christmas, and Captain Marvel (actually not Shazam this time out!) is duking it out with Ibac. Their battle sends them both crashing through a Mission... which gives them a measure of pause. They know they just messed things up for everyone who stays there! Well, that's sort of the "best case scenario" here... let's just hope there weren't any families inside at the time of impact!
Cap and Ibac reflect on their own pasts... and their connections to homelessness. And so, they decide to put their differences aside for a time to rebuild the joint they'd just destroyed.
Once that's done, Marvel offers Ibac amnesty... or, they can go back to fighting. Although he's certain he can take the Big Red Cheese in a fight, the baddie takes Cap up on his offer. We wrap up with Billy Batson volunteering at the Mission... and he's working next to an old fella who is wearing some very familiar armbands. Hmm...
--
This is another one of dem "of two minds" sort of stories. In a vacuum, it's pretty touching. Two enemies putting their differences aside for the greater good... Christmas spirit, all that jazz.
The fact that Cap and Ibac actually stopped fighting to rebuild a place they'd just destroyed has the unfortunate side-effect of reminding us (or me) that hero/villain battles often result in quite a bit of property damage... and almost never do the fighters stop to both reflect and pick up the pieces.
Probably the most interesting thing about this story is... the fact that our hero is called "Captain Marvel" and not Shazam! It just feels like they've been trying to change that forever at this point... but, I suppose in the pre-Flashpoint DC Universe they weren't so hard-and-fast over it. He's even called "Captain Marvel" in the Table of Contents page... because, yes, even though this was only a single page... it got a spot on the list.
Overall... decent enough little story... really nice art.
Tomorrow: Deadman vs. the Scarecrow?
DC Universe Holiday Special '09 (B'wana Beast)
"The Hunt for Christmas"
Writer - Beau Smith
Art - Gary Kwapisz
Colors - Pamela Rambo
Letters - Travis Lanham
Editors - Adam Schlagman & Eddie Berganza
Wouldja believe... the B'wana Beast?! Not a character one might expect to see in a circa-2009 Holiday Special... and not one I have all that much in the way of experience with. Only B'wana Beast story I can remember reading was when he appeared in the early issues of Grant Morrison's run of Animal Man. Never considered the fella a "leading man", but here we are!
Also, it's worth noting that this "branded" cover was a tremendous pain-in-the-butt! I can often find cleaner art online or I can snap a picture and remove the background... but with B'wana Beast? It wasn't that easy. I'm still not entirely happy with how it came out... but, it'll have to do.
--
We open with some smugglers attempting to flee the B'wana Beast and his animal pals. Oh, it's Christmas, by the way. With the aid of a rhino and some monkeys, the Beast is able to overtake the baddies... and commandeer their loot-filled truck! All the while, a hymm credited as "God Moves in Mysterious Ways" by William Lowper fills our narrative captions.
The Beast is able to kick off the final few smugglers, perhaps even sending them to their deaths... I mean, one dude goes flying off a cliff! Even if he survives the fall, I don't see him surviving all that long!
Anyhoo, the B'wana Beast flips the truck... and has to use his larger animal buddies to deliver the loot back to a nearby village who had been offered aid by a Christian Mission. And so, it looks as though they will have something to celebrate this Christmas.
--
This was an odd one, wasn't it?
First, I mean... it features the B'wana Beast. I know he had a bit of a surge in popularity (relatively speaking) due to an appearance or a few on Justice League Unlimited... heck, I'm almost positive he got an action figure out of the deal. Still though... a weird pick to be featured here. At least to me.
Second, the fact that it's so heavily rooted in religion. This was kind of a shock, seeing a nearly "current year" comic book narrated via a hymm... kinda jarring! It's not something I minded all that much, though I could see it taking some folks out of the story. Worth noting, the citation here isn't quite right. I did a little digging to see if this was a "real" hymm... and it is, only rather than being called "God Moves in Mysterious Ways", it's actually called "God Moves in a Mysterious Way"... and the fella who wrote it is William Cowper, not William Lowper. Now proofreading and attention to detail like that actually does make this feel like a "current year" comic! Good work, folks!
Now, as far as the "story" is concerned... there really isn't much of one. B'wana Beast is doing a nice thing for a poor village on Christmas... and, I suppose that's all it really needed to be. The art's pretty good, I never had to second-guess what I was looking at... and sometimes that's all we can ask for!
Tomorrow: A Captain Marvel story... where he ain't called Shazam! A Christmas Miracle!
DC Universe Holiday Special '09 (Enemy Ace)
"Stille Nacht"
Writers - Seamus Kevin Fahey & Sean Fahey
Art - Howard Chaykin
Colors - Edgar Delgado
Letters - John J. Hill
Editors - Adam Schlagman & Eddie Berganza
Welcome to Day 2 (of 2) of our War-Themed Christmas Coverage! These stories have a bit of a pattern of behavior, in that they're far more peaceful than our usual Blood 'n Metal War Comics Fare. I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that this one will be just like that.
--
We open on Christmas Eve... Eve, and the year is... hmm, 1914. Feel like we've referred to that particular Christmas a time or two before here. One time in particular while talking about the very same fella we're going to look at here! The long and short of it is, General Werner Dietrich has concluded that the next big German offensive will happen on Christmas Day. The Men aren't pleased in the slightest... but don't dare speak up. After the meeting a Lieutenant named Eric sidles up to Von Hammer to get his thoughts on the matter. Our Enemy Ace is steadfast that "orders are orders"...
In the day leading up to the attack, Von Hammer is questioned a few more times by his peers... and his answer remains the same. They have orders... it's not theirs to wonder why. Before we know it, it's Christmas Day... and the German fighters are sent west to get the jump on the English and French.
Enemy Ace and Company fly over some European wasteland as our man laments the fact that just five short months ago, this was a peaceful place. As they near their destination... they can suddenly hear something quite strange... they hear, singing?!
It's the English and French... they're singing Christmas Carols at Von Hammer and the Gang! And so, the Germans come in for a landing... to share in an unsanctioned Christmas ceasefire with their fellow European Soldiers.
--
What's that thing... ya know, where you learn about something, or are reminded of something you hadn't thought of in quite some time... but then, it's like everywhere you look, it's all you can see? Is that a thing? I could'a sworn it was one'a those literary "biases" you'd learn about in undergrad English and Lit classes.
Whatever it's called... that's what I've got right now. I honestly wasn't expecting to see a direct reference to the Christmas Truce/Ceasefire of 1914 here! It's funny how stuff like that happens!
Enemy Ace is certainly a complex character... I'm not sure I could read him in "large doses", however, for these little stories I find him quite captivating. A loyal soldier who follows orders without question... even when he has reservations about what he's being asked to do. There's definitely story potential in that... and for this story in particular, it works quite well. Really come away from this one with a deeper appreciation of War Comics... though, I'm still not overly anxious to do a deeper dive.
Something weird I noticed here is... Howard Chaykin on art. Not that Chaykin in and of himself is weird... what's weird is, this is the very first time we're talking about him on this blog! It's been four years of daily discussion... and somehow Howard Chaykin has never come up! That's weird! I do want to state for the record that I loved his art here! I feel like it matched the tone of the story and really added a lot to the overall package!
Tomorrow: Wouldja believe... B'Wana Beast?!
DC Universe Holiday Special '09 (Sgt. Rock)
"A Peace on Earth"
Story/Art - Billy Tucci
Colors - Hi-Fi
Letters - Rob Clark, Jr.
Editors - Adam Schlagman & Eddie Berganza
Today we kick off the first of two War-Era Christmas Stories, with Sgt. Rock. Definitely not my wheelhouse, but I'm confident even I can do war stories in short bursts! Especially when they come with a Holiday backdrop!
--
Guess what day it is... c'mon, you got this one. Yes, my friends... it's Christmas Eve (1944)! We open with Sgt. Rock out patrolling in the snow... when, as he passes under a bridge... he walks right by a German Soldier! They both scramble for their guns, and wind up slipping in the slush... with their firearms primed on one another, both men start laughing at the absurdity of the situation.
The German Solider asks Frank if he can spare a cigarette... and the two become fast friends. For the next little while, they drink, smoke, and share stories of their lives back home. Family pictures are exchanged... tales of woe are told, it's really quite a powerful little scene.
When the bottles are empty, they get back to their feet... and remind one another that they're both under strict orders from on high to "shoot on sight" when they are confronted by the enemy. And so... they do.
They both empty their guns... into the air.
They wish each other a Merry Christmas, and part peacefully... both likely knowing that the next time their paths cross, it won't turn out the same way.
--
I really enjoyed this. This might low-key be the best story in the issue.
I'm am, however, kind of "of two minds" on it... in that, I dunno... I feel like we've been here before. Regular readers will know that I'm not really a "war comics" kind of guy... quite frankly, (outside of a certain era of Blackhawk) they bore me. That being said, the only times I can really force myself to read them... is usually when they're in the form of some sort of Holiday special.
And yeah... this feels like a "been there, done that" sort of scenario. It's not bad... not in the slightest, it's just very well-trodden ground. Enemies putting their differences aside on one special day a year... I mean, it's even happened in real life during the Christmas Truce of 1914. Again though, when it's done as well as it is here... I can't be mad at it.
Not only was the story wonderfully touching... the art was... oof. The art was phenomenal... and so fitting of the tone of the story. Just a wonderful little Christmas story... and one I'd highly recommend.
Tomorrow: The third Enemy Ace story I'm going to force myself to read... also, the third Enemy Ace Christmas story I'm going to read!
