Flash Forward #4 (February, 2020)
"Flash of Two Worlds"
Script - Scott Lobdell
Pencils - Brett Booth
Inks - Norm Rapmund
Colors - Luis Guerrero
Letters - ALW's Troy Peteri
Associate Edits - Ben Meares
Edits - Paul Kaminski
Group Edits - Ben Abernathy
Cover Price: $3.99
Couple'a observations before we begin. First: Scott Lobdell has been credited only for the "Script" this entire time... which might absolve him a bit from this debacle.
Also... check it out... two new editors, four issues into a six-issue miniseries! Does it get more "Afterthought" than that? I mean, this is supposed to be a "straw that stirs the drink" sort of series, right? To drop it into another editor's lap halfway through does not speak much to how much DC cared about it. Which begs the question... why in all hells am I still wasting my time with it?
Uhhh... I don't have an answer to that.
Welp, least there's a(nother) Snickers ad!
--
We open at Wally's house, and it's early in the morning. He is attacked by... well, his kids... it's tickle-monster time! Linda enters the bedroom with some breakfast in bed for her hubby... the kids bust out of the room before the "gross" breakfast date can begin. Wally and Linda embrace talking about just how perfect their life together is... and, then... well, the other show drops. Wally's world is suddenly smothered in that Dark Matter... and, in an instant, his whole world disappears.
We next join Wally embroiled in a battle with... yawn... SuperDemon-Etrigan. Yeesh, Vampires last issue... the friggin' Demon this issue? If this isn't a recipe for disinterest, I don't know what it is! He deduces that the "perfect day" with the family was nothing more than a memory... that is to say, it didn't just happen.
As Wally's being choked out, we flash back to a little earlier at the Incursion Point. We actually get an illustration of just what is going on here... the Dark Matter is attempting to merge Earths. Not sure if that was made clear earlier on... or, if I was just too dense/too disinterested to catch on. The Dark Matter is joining Earths in the Multiverse (which would account for President Superman and the Fake-Ass Avengers occupying the same space back in Chapter Two. Anyhoo, the two Earths we're dealing with now are Earth-13 and Earth-32. Which ones are they? Who cares! It's just more weak, half-assed interchangeable alterna-Earths that don't matter in the slightest!
In the "present", the Metas from both Earths... well, they fight. It eats up a few pages, including a two-page spread... which speaks a bit to the fact that this story does not require a half-dozen issues to be told. Anyhoo, while the fight commences, Etrigan shakes the stuffing out of Wally... causing him to drop his Tempus-Rod-Thingie. Lucky for him, Lightspeed is nearby to pick the thing up! Wally vibrates out of the Demon's grip to check in with his alternate Earth wife.
So yeah, Lightspeed. This is the Linda Park of Earth-23... and I think this might be her first appearance. She's easy to conflate with other speedsters though, considering nearly every Flash story from the past decade has to do with Barry either teaming or fighting with a brand new speedster. That's not a sign that DC Comics has no idea what to do with the Flash, is it? Nahhh... couldn't be! Anyhoo, Wally and Linda have this weird half-flirt. By that, I mean Wally tells Linda she's his wife... and she is weirded out, since this is the first time they've met. Standard stupidity.
The Speedster-Spouses decide to team up and fight back the darkness... and whattayaknow, they do!
When the job's done, Lightspeed suggests she and Wally maybe consider getting together. Wally turns her down, claiming there's only one woman for him. He still gives her a big ol' kiss though!
Our man goes running (back into the Quantum Leap Accelerator)... and finds himself at... that place on the Cusp or whateverthehell... with the Mount Rushmore of people he'd killed in that dunderheaded Heroes in Crisis... because, lest we forget... he killed a bunch of folks in that sham-show of a "story"! Here's the thing, gang... up until this point, we actually had some pages of Wally smiling! This actually felt... albeit fleetingly... like a Wally West Flash story!
Anyhoo... we're at Mount Rushmore, which means Jai and Irie are there too! We have, what could've/should've been a touching father and child reunion... but, I feel like I'm punch-drunk at this point, so it all falls flat.
We wrap up with Irie quoting her favorite Kidd Video song... You Better Run!
--
I tell ya what, gang... I never expected this little series to make me so introspective. Over the past few days of covering this, I've had many conflicted emotions... on one hand, I was happy to finally be dipping into my recent backlog... if for no other reason, to justify the thousands of dollars I've spent on these things over the past couple years. On the other hand, though... I'm sorta feeling like a thawed-out caveman... and this "new world" is something I only sorta recognize. And... I've only been "away" (as in not totally kept up) for a relatively brief time.
I started to think about why I still do this. Why do I still fill out my monthly order at DCBS? Is it simply out of habit? Am I afraid that these books will actually become "good" at some point, and I'll have missed out? Have comics just become my "security blanket"? Something I, for better or worse, can "count on" month after month? Maybe it's all of that. Or maybe my head is completely up my ass at this point.
One theory that hit me sort of like a bag of bricks, was... I'm trying to have the best of both worlds here. In continuing to buy these things, I can tell myself that I'm "keeping up" in a way... sorta making good on whatever "contract" I've made with myself. Does that make sense? Maybe not... I dunno, I'm trying not to be too self-indulgent here.
Now, in not actually reading these new books... the characters I love so much are kind of "stuck in amber", ya know? They're just how I last remember them. I don't have to accept all of the ego-fueled BS that "superstar" writers have put them through in order to raise their own value. Quick note, I have not read a single issue of Superman or Action Comics since Bendis used one of the two tricks he has up his sleeve (because he only has two...), and revealed the secret identity. So, in MY canon, the ID hasn't been revealed. It's a weird line to draw, I understand... and it's a weak as hell attempt at, I dunno, "plausible deniability"... but, it's all I've got.
So, I still buy this garbage... month after month. I can tell myself I'm "keeping up" without having to acknowledge anything that's actually happening in the books. Does that make even a lick of sense? It sounded good in my head...
Anyhoo... let's look at this issue, in brief, so y'all can get to the Snickers ad.
This issue... wasn't all that bad. For a brief moment there, it actually felt like I was reading a Wally-Flash story. Things were bright and hopeful... Wally was smiling. We had things explained to us, so we could actually figure out some of the purpose of fighting back the Dark Multiversal Matter. This was probably the strongest issue yet... though, that really isn't a high bar to reach.
Then... WHAM - we're smacked in the face by Heroes in Crisis. A little aside... I don't know if anyone reading this has watched that Tiger King series on Netflix... I'm assuming at least some have. In it, the "star" Joe Exotic was feuding with a woman named Carole... and, he couldn't actually say her name without prefacing with "That B*tch"... so, you'd hear "That B*itch Carole" a lot. I feel like anytime I say Heroes in Crisis, I want to preface it the same way... That B*tch Heroes in Crisis.
So yeah, Wally's smacked upside the head by That B*tch Heroes in Crisis, just to remind us why we're here. There will be no smiles... there will be no carefree adventure... there will be no hope. Welp, lemme tell ya... that "no smiles" mandate is contagious. I'm certainly not smiling after setting this book down... and I doubt many are.
--
Interesting Ads:
Flash Forward #3 (January, 2020)
"Chapter Three: Freefall"
Script - Scott Lobdell
Pencils - Brett Booth
Inks - Norm Rapmund
Colors - Luis Guerrero
Letters - ALW's Troy Peteri
Associate Edits - Harvey Richards
Edits - Paul Kaminski
Group Edits - Jamie S. Rich
Cover Price: $3.99
Before we get into it, if you're here to see a Snickers ad... I'm happy to report that we've got one! Also, a cute Svengoolie strip to boot!
So... who's ready for some more cranky and curmudgeonly Chris?
Nobody? Well, please read on anyway...
--
We open on Earth-43 in... the place that used to be Gotham City (what is this, Convergence?). We've got a bunch of civilians being dropped from a cruise ship that hovers around a mile over the city... and Wally does his darnedest to give them all a safe landing. One of the women he saves says she's glad he's not "one of them". What "them", you ask? Well, looks like we're going to be dealing with... Vampires. Oh Puke.
Wally fights off Vampire Superman (who is far less cool than President Superman, but just as cringy to actually call by name)... when suddenly, he's attacked by Vampire Barry Allen! We can spy that someone is watching these fights go down from a distance through some crosshairs.
The Flashes fight... and run... and fight... and run, for a bit until Wally notices that Barry's head looks a lot like his good (dead) friends, Gnarrk, then Roy Harper! Seeing this immediately takes our man off his game, and opens up an opportunity for Barry to take the upper hand.
When it looks as though Barry's just about to land the killing blow... er, bite... he's struck down by like a dozen red arrows! Before going "fwoosh" into a puff of smoke, Barry thanks Wally for putting him out of his misery.
Who he ought to have thanked, however, was the fella who shot all dem arrows... any guesses who that might've been? I mean, you've seen the cover, right?
Of course, it's Roy Harper. He and Wally share some uncomfortable introductions before deciding that, if they're going to take down the Justice League of Vampires, it'd be best for them to work together. They hop into the Speedy-Mobile, and head off in the direction of the Batcave to take on the big-bad. Along the way, Wally shares some of his Roy's history, but doesn't actually come clean about having killed him in that horrible piece of crap story a year prior.
After vibrating through a rock wall, they finally manage to gain access the Batcave... and whattayaknow, it's just loaded with that nebulous Dark Multiversal Matter!
Wally in't shaken... he knows that his handy-dandy Tempus Rod will take care of bidness here. Unfortunately, no sooner does he unsheath the thing (from wherever it might've been sheathed), than it's whacked with a 'rang! Vampire Batman ain't keen on these interlopers... well, interloping.
As Wally goes off to chase his rod... Batman swoops down and delivers a fatal slash to Roy's gut!
By the time the Bat turns his attention to Wally, he's already re-procured the rod. He delivers a blast to the Bat... and, ya know, saves the day.
Wally then attends to Roy... who is fading fast. He can't help but to feel responsible, because... lest we forget, people dying is Wally West's only defining character trait these days! I'm glad there are so many "genius-level" writers out there these days to inform our opinion on these legendary characters... while giving back nothing.
--
Full disclosure... these (so far) three issues of Flash Forward are the only "current year-ish" DC Comics I've read in... probably six months. With every single panel I read it'd become more and more clear to me that, maybe this just isn't for me anymore.
I mean, has there ever been such an agenda-laden character-assassination of a beloved character than this in comics? I used to look at Marvel as being ridiculously adversarial toward its readership/customer base... but, the way Didio's DC has handled Wally West? It's almost like a "screw you" to the readers on every single page. Am I being a bit too precious here? Maybe. Am I projecting? Likely. But, I can't apologize for the way this series (and the garbage fire that led to it) makes me feel.
Let's go back just four years ago... DC Universe: Rebirth. It was, for fans of DC Comics, a dream come true. A sign that it was "safe" to come home again... without telling the fans of The New-52! that they were "no longer wanted" (like the way Flashpoint told all of us to "screw off"). It was a "best of all worlds" situation... and the embodiment of all of that was, the return of Wally West. Well... talk about a Monkey's Paw wish, right? What we didn't notice back in ye old 2016 was, that paw was giving us a big ol' middle finger! When looking back at how he's been treated over the past half-decade, I'm can say with 100% certainty that Wally West was better off in limbo.
Over the course of these three issues, Wally has told people not to refer to him as "a symbol of hope", pretty much flushing the entire mandate of his return in the first place. He can't go more than a few panels without stopping to think about how he killed a bunch of his friends. This isn't Wally West. This isn't fun to read. This is a situation where you go hunting (not that I've ever hunted)... and instead of "cleanly" shooting a deer in the head, you get it in the throat... and have to watch it slowly and painfully writhe and gurgle itself to death. Heroes in Crisis was the bullet... Flash Forward is the "writhing death gurgle".
Nothing against Scott Lobdell, who is still one of my very favorite writers... and is largely responsible for my several decades of superhero fandom in the first place (which makes us both sound ancient)... but, he's playing the cards he was dealt. Sucks for him that for this hand of Poker, he was dealt UNO cards.
That all having been said... this wasn't great. This felt like a Convergence tie-in, which is to say, it felt 100% pointless, drawn out, and a complete waste of time. It only served to have Wally come face-to-face with "a" Roy so he could act all guilty and nebulously remorseful around him. It's almost appropriate that this was Roy, since... there was a story a fifty years ago that led to dictating the way he'd been characterized ever since. Didja know Roy did heroin? They might've mentioned that once or twice over the past half-century. Also, didja know Wally killed a bunch of his friends? They might've mentioned that once or twice per panel in this issue!
All I'm left with right now is... wondering why I'm still preordering so many DC Comics month after month? What a waste.
--
Interesting Ads:
Flash Forward #2 (December, 2019)
"Chapter Two: The Line Forms on the Left"
Script - Scott Lobdell
Pencils - Brett Booth
Inks - Norm Rapmund
Colors - Luis Guerrero
Letters - ALW's Troy Peteri
Associate Edits - Harvey Richards
Edits - Paul Kaminski
Group Edits - Jamie S. Rich
Cover Price: $3.99
So, we took a look at Flash Forward #1 yesterday... and, in case it wasn't completely clear, I was not a fan of the situation that necessitated it being "a thing". Yesterday's post was perhaps a little less unbiased than I try to be... but, hey... whattayagonnado? DC Comics ain't payin' my bills, I don't get giddy at the thought of a retweet from the pros, and hell... I don't even bother milking/exploiting a "__ out of 10" ratings system, so, nobody really has all that much use for anything I share anyway!
Decided to give the second issue of Flash Forward a shot today... hopefully with a little less venom, because... I really shouldn't have any scorn toward this book in particular. This book is trying to make chicken salad out of the chicken... stuff that was Heroes in Crisis.
So... in the interest of giving this a "fair shake", lemme get all my venom out before the dashes.
A-hem. Heroes in Crisis was trash. It's writer is a hack. DC Comics was pathetically lazy in publishing an entire cornerstone event series on the simple premise that "there will be death". Heroes in Crisis singlehandedly destroyed all of the goodwill DC had garnered in the post-Rebirth landscape, and people should have lost their jobs for being involved in it.
Whew. Okay, onto the book!
Oh! One more thing... if Flash Forward ain't your thing... there is a new Snickers ad at the bottom of this piece. Yesterday's Snickers ad seemed to be the highlight for many readers!
--
We pick up right where we left off last issue. Wally has arrived on Earth-23, and is right there with President Superman, who is in the process of passing out. Suddenly, Wally and the Prez are attacked by... uh, black versions of the Warwolves from Excalibur? Wally gets in front of the ailing Superman, and aims his rod at the wolf (getch'er minds out of the gutter). Apparently, Tempus Fuginaut gave him this magic rod... though, to be honest, I did not notice that last time out. Anyhoo, the rod does the trick and destroys the beast.
As the dust begins to settle... Wally finds himself surrounded by: The Justice League of America. This team consists of Batman, Wonder Woman, Steel, and a Vixen who can only seem to "Mew" and "Hssss". President Superman orders his team to stand down, and ensures them the Speedster is an ally.
The Prez continues, telling of the events that led up to the current situation. He fought the Warwolves... Dark Energy... Dark Multiverse... yadda, yadda, yadda. He reveals that Congress has authorized use of an "Anti-Life Bomb" to fight off the threat... and it will go off in around 15 minutes (killing millions), unless they can stop it. Wally then, get this, blasts the President with the Tempus-Rod-Gimmick, and speeds away!
As he runs, he chats up Tempus Fuginaut... who seems somewhat pleased with Wally's progress. He's also a bit sarcastic, which... him being a "cosmic being", I could do without the snark. He pushes Wally to continue running... and he does, right into the laps of... the fake-ass Avengers (of Earth-8)! Looks like there's going to be a fight! Also, back in the "Oval Office of Solitude" (which might be a little too cute for me), the League makes a discovery regarding their leader.
Wally spends the next half-dozen pages fighting and exchanging banter with the phony Avengers... before he manages to Tempus-Rod-away some more darkness. This somehow saves both Earth 23 and 8. Fair enough. Our man then sends the Avengers Retaliators back home.
Just then, President Superman is back on the scene... and he's already taken care of that Anti-Life Bomb. He thanks Wally for purging the dark matter from his body with the rod back in the Oval Office. I suppose that's convenient enough. Wally bids the JLA farewell, and hops back into the Quantum Leap Accelerator for his next adventure.
After a full-page spread of Tempus friggin' Fuginaut pontificating, we arrive at "Incursion Point Zero" in the Dark Multiverse. There's a sort of creepy Mount Rushmore on the horizon, depicting all of the characters Wally killed during Heroes in Crisis. This is somewhat surprising to a pair of inhabitants... as they weren't there yesterday.
We wrap up by meeting those two inhabitants... it's (duh) Jai and Irie.
--
Lotta fighting in this one, eh? Feels like this might be a four-part series that they're doing their damnedest to make six, dunnit? I really don't think we needed a third of this book to be a pointless fight with the faux-Avengers. I guess that might've been enough pages for Lobdell to ensure that we "get" the references. Though, when you a team is called "The Retaliators" and it's led by a fella wielding a shield, there isn't much "driving the point home" left to do. And yeah, in case you weren't aware, this is all out of the Grant Morrison Multiversity deal.
We get a better understanding of the premise of the series here. While we knew the nebulous "darkness" was the enemy, now we get to see what that "darkness" actually looks like. And it looks like... the Warwolves? Okay, fair enough.
Everything here felt just a little too convenient... and in most cases, I would assume this would be leading off to a big "zig instead of zag" sort of reveal. I do not have that same confidence here... and feel like this is mostly just going-through-the-motions. When this miniseries was announced, while I was very excited... I did manage to temper my expectations a bit, figuring that this would be a halfhearted attempt from DC to give us something Wally-related, but not really "get behind it". This way, when all of us pre-Flashpoint "fossils" started to complain about Wally's treatment, they could shove the failure of this book in our faces as proof that "Wally doesn't sell". To this point (that is to say, two issues in), that's definitely how I'm feeling.
Wally fan or not, there really isn't all that much of a reason to read this. The final two pages, with the reveals of Jai and Irie... was something. Probably the only thing in this issue/series I've cared one iota about... but, I'm not at all confident in the direction we're headed.
Overall... "eh". If you made it this far, please enjoy your Snickers ad below the dashes!
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Interesting Ads:
Flash Forward #1 (November, 2019)
"Chapter One: Incursion Point Zero"
Script - Scott Lobdell
Pencils - Brett Booth
Inks - Norm Rapmund
Colors - Luis Guerrero
Letters - ALW's Troy Peteri
Associate Edits - Harvey Richards
Edits - Paul Kaminski
Group Edits - Jamie S. Rich
Cover Price: $3.99
Lemme tell ya somethin'... I was dying to read this book. From the moment it was announced, I absolutely could not wait to get my hands on it. Finally... DC would do something to reverse Wally's fortunes after the garbage that was Heroes in Crisis. I immediately got this bugger into my preorders, and was just so psyched that Wally would be redeemed, and hey... maybe he'd even get himself his own series (or at least membership on a team with their own series) out of this!
Then... a couple months passed. DC Comics turned into a ridiculous circus that, honestly, I didn't want any part of. "Edgy" Black Label speculator-bait, whatever the hell 5G is/was going to be, more friggin' Metal series', Superman givin' up the secret identity, "Dark Multiverse" specials bastardizing old classics, Doomsday Clock still not being finished (at the time)... what happened to this company, that just four-years ago was all about bringing the hope and light back to comics? So many promises not kept... so many gimmicks employed.
And so, when this book finally reached my grubby paws... I immediately chucked it in the pile, and didn't give it a second thought. Why should I/we even bother? DC Comics couldn't tell you the difference between "wet" and "dry" these days, why should I put a single ounce of interest in a book, character, concept, and universe that they treat like an afterthought?
I still continued to buy the thing, because a) I'm an idiot, and b) I'm part of the problem. And they stacked up... along with every issue of all the DC Comics I still haven't had the constitution to actually "quit" yet.
Well, today I'm going to finally give this one a look. Readers beware, there's likely to be some venom in the next several paragraphs.
--
We jump out of the pages of the absolute horseshi... err, abomination that was Heroes in Crisis and meet... Tempus Fuginaut! We've actually met this fella once before! Can't help but to feel like this is a Peter David character due to the punny name (sadly, it is not). Now, Tempus is lamenting the fact that there's an anomaly out there... a dark anomaly, which threatens to bring forward a Dark Multiverse. Throw in some garbage about the "Source Wall" and that might be the most "current-year DC Comics" sentence ever put to digital paper. Tempus monologues for four entire pages (like 20-25% of this issue) about how he (and the Multiverse) needs a hero... perhaps even the last one anyone (who didn't read the title or see the cover) might expect!
And so, we shift scenes to a flashback... from Heroes in friggin' Crisis. It's weird how cramming surface-level concepts that you'd learn in during the first few weeks of PSY101 into a comics story gets you lauded as a bulletproof genius online, innit?
Anyhoo, this is a flashback of Wally West. He's locked up in the SuperMax Prison, Blackgate... and just having a grand ol' pity party. I suppose if I were a character who'd been chewed up and spit out by creative over the past several years, I'd feel the same way. After a near-stabbing in the mess hall (he's actually "saved" by Murmur... who just doesn't want Wally's suffering to end quite just yet), Wally gets a visit from Linda Park. She's a reporter, natch, and is really only there to report the story... and tell Wally he's a doofus for deciding to drop his legal council.
We get a brief interlude of a winged character named Tarkul (of Edya 12) happening across the Mobius Chair somewhere on the cusp of the Multiverse. He dares to take a seat... and, well... it doesn't work out so good.
Back in Blackgate, Wally is... once again, flashing back to Heroes in Crisis... we mustn't forget this story happened (no matter how badly we may want to)! His flashback is interrupted by an attack from Girder and Tarpit. They bribed some guards to have their power-dampening collars removed... making this quite the uneven little fight.
At first, it looks as though Wally's just letting them beat the holy hell out of him! That is, until, a kick from Girder crushes Wally's own power-dampening collar.
Wally proceeds to take care of bidness, only to find himself greeted by... Tempus Fuginaut!
Tempus kind of just sits there for a bit, reacting to the "corruption of the Multiverse", before telling Wally that he needs the fastest being in the Multiverse to destroy the dark anomaly. Wally hems and haws a bit, claiming that he's not quite as fast as Tempus might think... and so, the weird golden fellow blasts him with his boom-stick, which manages to "unmoor" him so he might reach his full potential.
We wrap up with Wally forcefully busting through the Multiversal boundary and arriving on... Earth-23!
--
Ya know, outside of my discussion of the first part of Superman: Grounded, I don't think I've ever had such an urge to break my "no cursing" rule here on the site... and it's not because of the actual issue we're looking at. No, it's the circumstances that necessitated this issue being written that really get under my skin. I don't blame Scott Lobdell... if anything I'll give him a ton of credit for "playing the ball where it lay". Lesser writers (or writers higher up on the pecking order who don't have to follow any rules) wouldn't have been able to do that.
It's Heroes in Crisis that brings us here. An absolute sham of a story that only sold on the premise of shock and outrage. This wasn't a good story... it wasn't a story that added any value to the characters within. That series only sought to raise the stock of a single stakeholder... and unfortunately, it wasn't one of the actual characters.
So, without rambling any further on rubbish (because I definitely could), let's talk about this issue.
It... was fine, I guess. Couldn't care less about Tempus Fuginaut, and the Dark Multiverse borders on chore and absolute bore. I read this for Wally. As much as I know that I'm building myself up for a massive disappointment, I still care a lot about this character! I "grew up" with the guy... and he was (and always will be) my Flash.
Maybe we'll take a look at the next issue tomorrow. Then again, maybe we won't. Sorry if this here discussion veered toward the negative... something tells me, I'm not alone in feeling this way about contempo-DC.
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