X-Men Vignettes, Chapter Forty-Five (1992)

 

X-Men Vignettes #45 (1992)
"The Mission"
Writer - Ann Nocenti
Pencils - Dave Ross
Inks - Josef Rubenstein
Letters - Joe Rosen
Colors - Bob Sharen
Edits - Milgrom, DeFalco
From: Marvel Fanfare #60 (December, 1991-January, 1992)

Welcome back to... X-Men Vignettes?! That's right -- today we're in "lost episode" territory, taking a look at the story that was set to appear in Classic X-Men #45 (March, 1990)... but instead, sat in a drawer for a couple of years... until Marvel realized the final issue of Marvel Fanfare (January, 1992) came up a dozen or so pages short!

Huge thanks to Chris U. for letting me know this story exists... and for sending me on a merry hunt! I'm always looking for excuses to hit da bins...

Without any further ado... let's have a goo...

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Our story opens with a playfully peculiar Rogue sneaking up on Mystique to give her a skin-to-skin bop on the nose. This, as you might imagine, freaks out and annoys Raven... but, Rogue assures her that she only touched her long enough to steal a single thought. Not sure which one, but I suppose that doesn't really matter. All this is to establish is that Rogue's acting a bit reckless with her powers. Right off the bat, I'm really not digging this art. I know Marvel Fanfare (especially at the very end of its run), felt very much like the repository of inventory stories... which, ya know, this is one (remember, this was supposed to appear in Classic X-Men #45 some two years earlier) - but, add to that the rushed-looking art and it makes it feel even more like an afterthought. Rogue's facials in particular are rather unpleasant. The last panel on the second page looks like it's out of an old women's prison exploitation movie.

Anyway, Rogue tells Mystique that she's gotta "get her kicks" somewhere... and, by "kicks" she's talking skin-to-skin contact. Mystique isn't cool with this at all, and reminds her that they've got a big mission this evening. And so, we jump right into it. That night, Mystique and Pyro are waiting around for Rogue to show up... complaining about having to deal with an adolescent. When she finally arrives, Rogue is dressed... um, I think it's supposed to be "sexy", but it comes across in the art as more... skankily awkward? Anyway, she tells Pyro that he's lookin' hot, before Mystique starts giving the lay of the land.

The mission is... to spring some dude named Jason out of the McCarthy Medical Treatment Center and have him join up with the Brotherhood. To do so, Mystique is going to assume the form of one of the staff doctors... while Rogue's going to pretend to be a relative of Jason's who's really wanting a visit. The pair manage to make it past the first security checkpoint... which is to say, the first old man sitting at a desk -- however, aren't so lucky with the second. He, despite knowing "Dr. Forbes", still demands to see his identification card. And so, Rogue kisses and kayos him. Worth noting, Rogue seems really turned on at the sight of her "mother" shapeshifted into a fella.

After kissing the old man, our woozy Rogue shares the thought/memory she'd stolen from him with Mystique... and it's that he stole his mother's wedding ring and pawned it. From here, it's checkpoint number three... which is, well, another old man at a desk -- only, this one's got a gun! Rogue sweet talks him a bit before kissing him too. Mystique's beginning to worry that, should she keep this up, young Rogue's gonna lose her mind! And, indeed -- it looks like she's about to!

Finally, at this point, there's nothing standing between the Brotherhood and Jason Nolastname -- and so, Rogue lets herself into his solitary confinement gimmick. Only, she locks Mystique out -- ya see, she's still not done having fun. Remember, she's gotta "get her kicks" anywhere she can. Now, this Jason is... some dude... who, I'm pretty sure we never see again. He's sitting silently on a very modern-looking couch. Rogue approaches, calling him handsome (he's not), and asking if he likes her (he doesn't seem to).

She tells him that she's a freak, just like him... and goes to start giving him a shoulder massage, if the art's any indication. Still locked out, Mystique radios over to Pyro to command him to start melting his way through the wall... and so, he gets to sprayin'.

By now, Rogue's already removed her elbow-length gloves so she might... get her kicks. Jason, however, has a different idea -- sorta. He grabs her by her (bare) wrist, tells her he's not to be played with... and, tosses her across the room like a sack of laundry! Now, since there was skin-to-skin contact here... maybe Rogue sucked up a memory or thought? She's sat on the floor -- and knows that, for Jason, touch, is pain... I think?

At this point, Jasons demeanor changes... he softens. Telling Rogue that she wants to live... but, it's possible to live "too much". So much so that you become sealed off. Is this making sense to anybody else? He tells her she's lucky she can't touch... and they exit the cell together. I tell ya, it'd be a sweet scene... if it made any sense. Or, maybe I'm just an idiot.

This takes us to the wrap up... Pyro finally melts his way in, giving the Brotherhood (and guest) a clear path to escape... and so, they do. We close out with Rogue asking Mystique for help... and, we out.

--

It's kinda like riding a bike, covering these Vignettes -- it's almost like I already knew what to x-pect before even beginning. This was... an inventory story. It wasn't one begging to be told, it doesn't really change anything -- it's just a character-focused little ditty from the long ago... and another reminder that, despite her first appearance depicting her to be a woman in her mid-to-late 40's, Rogue was actually a precocious young teen when she got her start. I feel like this story really worked hard to (over)correct on that.

That said, however... was it any good? Ehh... being a man who still suffers flashbacks to X-Men Unlimited (the real X-Men Unlimited), I may not be the right fella to ask. I feel like I can smell an afterthought inventory story from a mile away... which, reasonable or not, does affect my enjoyment level. It's like, if the people getting paid to put this stuff out don't care -- why in the world should I? That's kinda how I'm walking away from this story. Add to that, the rushed and loose artwork... it's just a recipe for disinterest.

The only way this story can pay off (to me), is... and, this is going to sound odd... but, if there were more chapters of it coming down the pike. Who is Jason? Why is he so important? What's Rogue's "lesson" here? I feel like, had Nocenti been given more pages/installments... we may have gotten some of those answers. As it stands now, this feels unfinished. And, since it never will be (at least to my knowledge), we're left here scratching our heads wondering what the point was.

In the comments, the last bit of Vignettes were compared to something Marvel was doing over in Solo Avengers, where the backup stories included there, rather than being one-offs... became multi-part stories. I feel like there's a lot to this theory... and, had Marvel decided to keep the backup feature going, we would've probably gotten another 1-4 chapters of this Rogue/Mystique story spread out over then next handful of issues. It's really the only way a story like this makes sense (at least to me).

Overall -- it's kind of a worst of all worlds situation. As a two-part story, it's both too long... and too short. If Marvel were never planning on following up on this (and, as this is the final issue of Marvel Fanfare, it doesn't seem like they were)... it may've been just as well not to publish it at all.

X-Lapsed, Episode 335 - X-Men #9 (2022)

X-Lapsed, Episode Three Hundred Thirty-Five

X-Men (vol.6) #9 (May, 2022)
"The Rule of Three"
Writer - Gerry Duggan
Art - C.F. Villa
Colors - Marte Gracia
Letters - VC's Clayton Cowles
Design - Tom Muller
Edits - Amaro, White, Cebulski
Cover Price: $3.99
On-Sale: March 2, 2022

Once again, talking about that book that feels stuck between two Eras of X!  This time out, we sit in on three meetings: one on Krakoa, one on Phobos, and one on Marsarakko... and, it's even less interesting than it sounds.

But - Rogue and Sunfire actually show up in the book they're supposedly castmembers of... so there's that!

--

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Dazzler #3 (1981)

 

Dazzler #3 (May, 1981)
"The Jewels of Doom!"
Writer - Tom DeFalco
Pencils - John Romita, Jr. & Alan Kupperberg
Inks - Danny Bulandi & Armando Gil
Colors - Bob Sharen
Letters - Joe Rosen
Edits - Fingeroth, Jones, Shooter
Cover Price: 50¢

Ya know... I write a lot.

There's some hackneyed saying about writers (though I wouldn't describe myself as one), that they have so many "bad" pages in 'em before they finally "get it"... and everything just comes together. With me... I feel like it's kind of the opposite.

It seems like the more I write, the less gooder I am become with my grasp of the English language. It might sound like I'm kidding... but, I assure you, I'm not. I literally sit here trying to think up the right words to use... many, many, many times every article. I don't remember it ever being like that before. Maybe I'm losing my mind? Maybe I am become more dumber than was? I dunno... you be the judge... or something!

For now though, let's Dazzle!

--

Today's story opens with... Dazzler dropping a bunch of exposition. At least this time out, she's just thinking all of it to herself, rather than saying it all out loud. Anyway, she's getting bombarded by sound... which she is doing her darnedist to transmute into light. Turns out this is only a test... she's dropped by the Baxter Building, and asked Reed to give her mutant powers a goo. Johnny is a bit annoyed, having assumed she was there only to see him. Worth noting, poor Ben Grimm is doing that thing he always seems to be doing at home... carrying something huge and heavy from ova here-- to ova there. Wotta revoltin' development.

Since this is a Marvel comic, and we've got some guest-stars... it's not long before an outta nowhere action scene breaks out. Dazzled by the Dazzler, poor Ben drops the heavy whateverthehell on his favorite bunion -- Johnny has a laugh before going to prove that Daz can't do anything to best him -- so, she skates over to a wall and procures a fire extinguisher to shut him up. Sue then appears right in Ali's path, which sends her skidding off into Reed's oversized rubbery mitt.

With all the tea kettles now settled, it's time for us to find out what today's issue is actually going to be about. Johnny spies something very troubling in the newspaper... turns out, Doctor Doom's jewels (ew!) are going to be displayed at the United Nations. From here, we get a quick 'n dirty retelling of the events of Fantastic Four #200 (November, 1978), wherein Prince Zorba Fortunov of the Latverian Freedom Fighters wrested the crown of Latveria from Doom. Doom lost his throne... and his marbles. And now, the FF are worried that this exhibit might draw him out of hiding.

After a somewhat flirtatious farewell between Dazz and "Torchy", we shift scenes over to the United Nations, where the Doom Jewel Expo is about to begin. Latveria's mustachioed ambassador to the U.N., Dr. Arturo Frazen is present. He finds this entire to-do to be a sham. He also considers Zorba to be a weak and ineffectual leader. He mentions something about the crown jewels winding up on the international market... though, I'm not totally clear here on whether that's his goal... or his worry.

Over to Boss Hogg's, where Dazz is given her next gig. Much to her annoyance, it's a charity show for UNICEF. Now, she has no beef with the fine folks at UNICEF, it's just that -- she needs that chedda... she's about to be booted from her pad. She's also introduced to her new meathead manager, Lance Steele... who looks just as porny-creepy as his name might suggest. Lancelot tells Ali that they'll get on swimmingly... so long as she obeys his orders. I guess when you rely on a dozen of your super-powered pals to bully a man into offering you a talent contract... maybe don't expect to be given the cherriest of gigs?

With nowhere left to turn to, Alison decides to head home to visit (and attempt to make peace) with her father, Judge Carter Blaire. She is warmly met by Nana... and, initially, embraced by dad. That is, until she reveals that she's not exactly here to beg for his forgiveness. She hasn't changed her mind about going to law school, following in his footsteps, yadda, yadda, yadda. I'm not sure exactly what she's here for... probably help with the rent, and some cold cuts to keep her half-eaten box of baking soda company in the fridge. He gives her the boot... again.

Well, at this point we're eleven pages in... howsabout we get that dude from the cover into the story? We head over to a castle in the Bavarian Alps, where Doctor Doom is met by some red-cloaked messenger... who reveals that Zorba sent the crown jewels over to the United Nations... Doom's not worried nor impressed. That is, until he finds out that the Merlin Stone was among them! Doom decides he must act.

We rejoin Arturo Frazen, who's still gazing at the jewels at the U.N. As luck would have it, security is a bit lax right now, because... get this... that UNICEF concert is taking place right there! As the massive crowd begins to form, Frazen hires some goons in "punk rock attire" to help him swipe the loot. As the concert's getting set up, Lancelot Steele is giving the orders backstage. Looks like nobody really cares for him... nor takes him seriously -- and well, they probably shouldn't.

After busting in on Dazz's dressing room, where she hasn't even had the chance to (literally) let her hair down yet, Lance spots the "Punk Rockers"... and decides he's gonna serve up some knuckle sandwiches... no questions asked. Only, by the time he approaches them, he comes to find he's far more outnumbered than he originally thought. He gets his ass kicked. Lucky for him, Dazzler overhears this beating... and she just so happens to have a new analog iPod with which to pump out some transmuted funk.

She skates over to the meathead's rescue, PWAPing the baddies but good. Meanwhile, on stage -- the show has already begun. We see Boss Hogg off to the side wondering where his "personable and proficient protégé" may have gotten off to. If you were to guess that Ali was in the middle of like a 75 page fight scene, you'd be getting warm.

Okay, okay... it's more like a four page fight scene... but still, a tad bit too long in this idiot's opinion. Anyway, once the "punk rockers" have been soundly thwarted... Ali gets zapped in her shoulder. This, as you might imagine, manages to get her attention. She turns around to see that she's in the shadow of... DOOM. And, if the art here is to be believed, she's the only thing standing between him and the nearest toilet... and, lemme tell ya -- it's an emergency!

Meanwhile, lotsa pieces are falling into... and out of place. Lance pulls himself to his feet... but is in too much pain to really do anything. On stage, the act before Dazzler is about to wrap up their set... and, thanks to Janine from Ghostbustas, Boss Hogg knows that neither Dazz nor her Lunkhead manager are around. Right then and there, Osgood announces that Dazzler is off the show... and will, ya know, never work in this town again. Worth noting, (I think that's supposed to be) Johnny Storm is in the crowd waiting to see his new obsession in action.

Back to Dazz... as Doom, gentleman that he is, helps her to her feet so he can dollop some exposition into her dome. The Merlin Stone, ya see... is a gem (well, a collection of gems actually) imbued with some magical hoo-doo by the wizard Merlin himself to make its owner invincible. Doom had already sent the Fantastic Four back in time to track the jewels down... way back during his first appearance in Fantastic Four #5 (July, 1962). Only, rather than return to the present with them -- the FF brought back only worthless chain.

In the interim, Doom was able to procure one of these gems... and also locate the second (in a nearby dimension). He assumes that with two of the Merlin Stones, it'll be a cinch to track down the rest. As he goes to reclaim the one from the exhibit... Dazzler attempts to stop him! And so, well... you know... it's time for a(nother) fight scene! Dazzler does manage to get a few good shots in... serving a whopper of a dropkick to go along with her light show. Ultimately, Doom wins... because, well, he's Doom.

We wrap up with Doc loading Dazz onto his... frankly adorable little rocket sled/scooter... and flying into the night. He believes he might have use for her yet... and, perhaps we'll find out exactly what that is... next time!

--

From the crem de la crem of Marvel's heroic pantheon to... one of, if not the premiere villain in the universe. Dazzler just can't help but to fail upwards, eh?

Still having a really good time with this. I feel like, maybe we're overdoing it a tad with the action... perhaps even overcompensating with it. I wonder if there was a conscious decision to try and keep this book from being "too girly" or "too soapy"? I dunno about y'all, but... I mean, this is a character outta the X-Men... and, it didn't get much soapier than that... I think I'd be okay with Dazzler following in that tone. We are getting bits and pieces of "soap", in Ali's relationship with her father... and her day-to-day financial woes, so that's cool. It's also still very early in the run, so -- maybe the Bullpen is trying to establish the book in such a way where it's not dismissed as "slice of life" fluff?

I dunno... I'm probably thinking too hard.

The story we did get here... to use a phrase I tend to overuse... was a bit Dagwood Sandwichy. Lotta moving parts... many of which felt kinda unnecessary. Arturo Frazen's scenes were a bit confusing... his motivation wasn't made clear (at least not to a dullard like me) until the end... and, I mean... the entire robbery attempt wound up being a non-issue page-waster anyway. I dunno, maybe next issue will see some more hot 'n steamy Arturo and the Punk Rockers action?

The art was... uneven. Not bad... just not as good as it was in the first two issues. Romita's pencils were not helped in any way by Bulandi's inks... and the shift from John Jr. to Alan Kupperberg, while not jarring, was somewhat noticeable. It Marvel's banking on Dazzler being their premiere Direct Market exclusive (for now), it'd probably be best to keep the artwork consistent, at least for the first half-dozen to a year's worth of issues. At least in my opinion. Having multiple pencilers and inkers involved in a regular-sized issue reeks of running up against Dreaded Deadline Doom... and, makes the series feel like it's an afterthought.

Perhaps I'm being a bit harsh, as... like I said, the art isn't bad. But, for it only being the third issue... consistency needs to be key. Again, at least in my opinion.

Overall - another fun outing with Disco Dazz. I'm looking forward to seeing where this goes... and I hope you are as well!

--

Letters Page (wow, that was quick!):

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Dazzler #2 (1981)

 

Dazzler #2 (April, 1981)
"Where Demons Fear to Dwell!"
Writer - Tom DeFalco
Pencils - John Romita, Jr.
Inks - Alfredo Alcala
Colors - Ken Klaczak
Letters - Jim Novak
Edits - Jones, Shooter

Happy Sunday - Happy Mother's Day. Apologies for the lateness of this piece (assuming anybody out there noticed), I'm running a bit behind today. I seem to have been a little too overzealous with yesterday's "Anatomy of a Slap" piece... wasn't planning on publishing it until today... but, accidentally his the "Publish Immediately" button, and figured I'd just roll with it. Generally, I like to have tomorrow's piece ready to publish today... that's been the way I've operated for... well, as long as I've been doing this.

Welp, with today's piece... I'm putting it together right as it's going to go "live". Hopefully I'll be able to squeeze in some "double duty" in order to get back ahead of the game.

Add to that, Wordpress is having one'a those mornings... as in, it hasn't yet decided if it's going to allow me to upload my images. So, I'm looking forward to a couple hours worth of "negotiations" with my laptop... which hopefully won't end with me chucking it thru the wall. I guess if you're reading this... my computer still lives!

Anyway -- it's Dazzler time! With the novelty of the first ish out of the way -- it's time to strap in for the continuing story. But first, I wanna thank the folks who reached out to let me know they enjoyed the first Dazz-article! Really means a lot. I hope you'll pop back in with me for the rest of the run!

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As we open, Dazz's big break is about to... well, break! She's sat before her dressing room mirror, carefully applying her "facial makeup". I dunno why, but they refer to it as "facial makeup" several times throughout the issue. I'd think just plain "makeup" sounds a bit less stilted... maybe "facepaint", if they absolutely need to specify where the stuff goes? Anyway, as she's paintin' away, she's recapping the events of the previous issue... out loud. I know celebrities can be eccentric, but, Ali talks to herself (out loud) quite a bit during this ish. Well, we'll allow it for this scene, as poor girl's doing anything she can to fight off a bit of stage fright. It stands to reason that she'd be a bit nervous... this is her big debut (it's like a dream come true)... okay, I don't have the pipes of a Michael McDonald, so I'll just move on to some more reasons she's got a case of the nerves. Ya see, she's going to be singing before a star-studded crowd! Such as... Benjamin Grimm and Johnny Storm!

And the X-Men (including Angel, who if upcoming covers are any indication, Ali's gonna be making time with before long)! They're... where else? The Danger Room, where we get a bit more Kitty-continuity here, as she's still quite upset that the Prof won't let her take part in the training seshes.

Also, the Avengers! Wasp calls Cap out for wearing his shield under his suit jacket. C'mon, Jan, give a fella a break. I mean, Steve going to a disco ought to be enough...

From here, we jump to the Numero Uno Disco and see just how packed the place is. Tony Stark's here... also, Beast -- in his full-on Eddie Munster look. Man, earlyish blue-Beast was kinda ugly, eh? Also, Romita, Jr. appears to have been a hyooge fan of widows peaks.

So, Dazz takes the stage, and starts belting out some disco funk, bathing the entire place in Ali-Orbs (still looking for a better name for those things, if anybody wants to help a fella out). Behind the scenes, the Enchantress... who apparently now lives in the Disco, goes about making her move. In the crowd, we see a very seventies-ed out Peter Parker trying to make time with, in his words, a perfect "10"... hmm... perhaps a nod to the potential cinematic-Dazzler... Bo Derek? Even though the gal Pete was lingering around looked more like Mary Jane.

So, Dazzler's singin' while Enchantress is doin' some spooky stuff with her fingers, yes? The hoo-doo that she do, turns out to rapidly age Ali... to the point where she very nearly dies!

Ali lets out one last blast... firing at the disco ball spinnin' from the ceiling. This is, somehow enough, to undo the Enchantress's spell. Imagine that, being undone by a disco ball? I'm actually surprised this didn't become a running joke anytime the Enchantress shows up. Then again, that would assume that anybody writing comics a) knew this series existed, and b) read it past issue one.

So, y'all got enough story for now? Cuz... we're kinda done tellin' one. From here, all the heroes in the crowd rush to the bathroom to change into their "workin' clothes", while Enchantress calls forth some generic trollish monsters from... I dunno, maybe Asgard's "other side of the tracks"? She refers to them as her "Hateful Harbingers of Horror and Holocaust", which sounds like a killer band name. Anyway, the battle rages for the next several hundred pages. In a cute bit, Kitty tries to get in on the action... but, decides to powder out at the last minute, leading the baddie to smash his dome on a wall. Wolverine approves... before "busting loose".

As the melee roars on, Dazzler finds her way backstage to confront the Enchantress... who, she calls "mama", like she's A.C. Slater or something. There's a lotta "mama" in this ish, by the by. Maybe Tom D. knew I'd be discussing it here 31 Mother's Days later? Anyway, Enchantress decides to summon yet another "grisly messenger" for Alison specifically.

Which our gal is able to fight off with one massive dollop of disco funk.

Enchantress is all "eff this noise", and bugs off back to Asgard. As the dust settles, the heroes assemble. Dazzler is worried she just blew her big debut... though, Spidey says she ought to be proud of how she handled things. Ya know, I wonder if there were ever any plans on hooking Pete and Ali up? Stranger things have happened...

Just as Alison is at her lowest point... an old man crawls out from under a toppled table tent. He's Joseph R. Ercoli, a (um) music publisher. He wants to hook her up with some Boss Hogg lookin' agent, named Harry Osborngood. He hands over his card... which is the size of a small piece of paper.

That Monday morning, an Avengers quinjet shows up to take Dazz to the agent. Turns out, even with the card, she can't get a meeting. Janine from Ghostbustas tells her it's a no-go. And so, Eddie Munster shows up to provide a distraction. Janine is flaggerghasted, and assumes this blue fellow is Ali's "exotic pet". Is that offensive? I feel like it might be. I dunno. Anyway, while Janine tries to figure it out, Alison's able to slip in to chat up Boss Hogg.

... and, well... he throws her out. He doesn't wanna hear or see anything outta her. Unfortunately for him... outside his 39th floor office window, nearly a dozen of Marvel's Finest are there to apply some pressure. Even an oddly smirking Wolverine... who, I thought for a split second was Batroc ze Leepair. I gotta say, I love how Thing just calls this dude a creep. Benji's not one to split hairs. The heroes... uh, bash their way through the safety glass to further put the screws to our man. I wonder if Ali's contract (should she be offered one) will be binding... like, will it be like a coerced confession or something, that'd get tossed outta court? I dunno...

All that matters for now is, Ali's getting her audition. Wolverine (oddly) plays master of ceremonies, bowing and introducing the disco queen... while Iron Man's armor pumps out the jams. I almost wish that word balloon was going to Logan... I'd like to picture him beatboxing and rhythmically drumming on his belly or something. Maybe Boss Hogg has an empty jug he can blow into?

Turns out, Dazzler's able to rock Osgood's socks off... and she's immediately signed to a contract. None of the heroes seem to feel all that bad about, ya know, forcing him to do this -- and so, it's high-fives all around. But, with the good news, comes some bad -- our next issue blurb promises that Dazz' about to cross paths with... Doctor Doom!

--

Ya know, the "first issue" shine might be behind us... but, we're still so early into this little reading/writing project that I'm still having quite a good time with it. Yeah, that might not seem like high-praise just two issues in... but, trust me when I say that it is. Not only is this fun to read... but, reliving it in the writing is also kind of a blast. It's not too serious... but, it's not completely off the wall silly either. Well, I suppose our disco ball mileage may vary, eh?

This was a great issue to establish Dazzler's connections to the wider Marvel Universe. As it stands, this issue was only her sixth appearance. She hasn't had all that much time to hob-nob. Now, it's like she doesn't even have to! Everybody knows her... and, I think that's probably for the best. Saves us a lot of awkward introductions and that forced bit'a fighting before friendship. I mean, this is Marvel, after all...

Ali's show was a pretty organic way of having all the heroes together in one place. Rather than having a lightshow emanating from the Numero Uno, which just happens to grab the attention of heroes who... just happen to have been passing by - we get a nice, natural build. The Enchantress, has never been all that interesting a character to me... though, in fairness, I do seem to have that Asgardian allergy. Her motivations here made sense though. Here, we have a woman who's able to... well, for lack of a better term... "dazzle" those around her with her beauty, and she's been upstaged by our gal Ali. Naturally, she's going to wanna get a bit of revenge. Summoning the Asgardian (?) hordes was a decent enough way to serve up a meaty action-heavy middle portion of the ish. It gave the heroes the opportunity to show their stuff, while lifting Dazzler up to their level.

The bits about Ali's career... were weird, yes? I mean, intimidation is one thing... but, having a dozen heavy-hitting heroes force a man to give you an audition? Sure, it's played for comedy... but, it's really not a good look, izzit? Like, what would'a happened if Osgood still refused to let Dazzler sing? Would Wolverine had gutted him? Maybe Iron Man would'a vaporized him? Perhaps strangest of all -- Captain America was hear leading the charge. You'd figure Cap wouldn't abuse his authority in such a way... and for such a silly reason.

Oh well... I suppose it told the story it needed to tell. Like I said a few paragraphs ago -- this book isn't as deadly serious as some... so, I guess if we're going for fun-n-dumb, we gotta accept that this story might go in a direction or two that don't entirely "square up" with our expectations. That, or... ya know, I'm thinking wayyy too hard about something that doesn't really matter. Well, that is kinda my gimmick.

Overall, I had a really good time with this one. Story was good, dialogue was... interesting, and the art was mostly a treat! John, Jr.'s widows peak-abuse aside, this was a really good looking book!

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(Not the) Letters Page:

Here's an interesting inclusion. As we discussed (at great length) last time, Dazzler #1 was Marvel's first Direct Market exclusive publication. Stands to reason that some folks may not have been able to procure their copy! Don't worry none, though -- as we know, there are like a half-million of 'em floating around out there! Even nowadays, Dazzler #1 is among the easiest issues of this volume to happen across! Try finding the Michael Jackson Thriller homage issue in the cheap-o bins... that one'll elude ya, lemme tell ya!

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